Married Student Housing

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Married Student Housing

“Well, err . . .” Mr. Golding, the head admissions officer was caught off guard by the question David asked him. If he were honest with himself, he’d admit that he had been a bit uncomfortable for the whole interview. When David and Jenna Noland had called him in his office at Central Texas College and asked if they could do a joint-interview for their applications, he didn’t think much of it. He was happy to see them too; both of their applications had been extremely impressive, with distinction in the essays. David’s was about secularism and why it was hurting society, and Jenna’s was on the subject of management versus self-regulation in the workplace. He didn’t mind having them both do an interview together.
When they had come in, David was dressed in a simple collared polo and boot-cut jeans. Jenna wore a pretty white blouse and a floral-embroidered knee-length skirt. He shook both of their hands, and they sat down in the twin leather chairs in front of the desk. It was only after the two sat down, when they held hands, and he noticed his plain silver band and her Celtic cross band, that he had realized they were married. The interview had been going on for about 10 minutes now, and he should have been ready for the question, but for some reason, it threw him off balance.
“You do offer housing for married students, right?” David repeated, leaning his head slightly closer to the large oak desk.
“Yes, we do have apartments available for students who are marriage partners.” He suspected that he sounded slightly less sure than he should have been, but he was confident he’d gotten his point across.
David and Jenna both smiled, and their hands seemed to grip more tightly. “That’s good. We looked over quite a few of our choices, and this was the best place we could find that offered it,” Jenna said.
“Well, glad I could help you out.” He adjusted the red and gold patterned tie around his neck and took a few sips from his glass of water.
“Any other questions, Mr. Golding?” David prompted.
“Ah, yes. So, what fields do you both plan to go into?” Golding asked the young couple.
“I have interests in communication and engineering. I’d like to go into broadcast radio,” David answered.
“I’ve always wanted to be a teacher,” Jenna said. “I worked as a Residential Assistant at the Johns Hopkins CTY program, and I love working with kids.”
“Very nice, those are both admirable goals.” Mr. Golding noticed that they both seemed to enjoy working with other people. That was a good quality. All of their answers to this point had even sounded more mature than most applicants, simply in the tone and confidence of their speech. Part of it was likely due to the fact that they were both 20 years old, and had more life experience than most applicants.
The rest of the interview went off without any problems. Golding was even out of his discomfort towards the end. They were no different than any of the numerous people he’d interviewed in the past week, other than the rings they both wore.
After the interview was over, they both stood up at the same time from their seats. “Well, thank you very much for having us, Mr. Golding,” Jenna said, nodding her head modestly.
“No problem, it was wonderful hearing from you both. I wish you luck in the rest of the application progress.” Golding shook David’s hand again, and watched as he walked out with his arm around his wife’s shoulders.
Golding fell back into his comfortable office chair. He looked around at all four of the walls of his small office. There were framed pictures of him receiving awards, shaking hands with all sorts of people, students and teachers and faculty and such, and his own personal photos of him with his wife and two daughters in several countries. He’d been working at Central Texas College for 27 years, and he’d seen a lot of things in here, but never had he interviewed two married students applying to his college.
Golding smiled as he thought of them though. They were both very nice people, and he was sure they would do well in college. But he had no awareness of the couple’s problem, which had almost made them decide to not even come to his office on that day. It was August 1st, the one month anniversary of Jenna’s pregnancy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It wouldn’t be terrible, if you decide you want to do it,” David said, gently cradling Jenna’s hand in his own. “Everything would work out.”
Jenna scooted slightly closer to David on the old green couch in the small family room. She laid her head on his shoulder with a sigh. “I know, but I just don’t know if I have the strength to go through with it. I don’t know if I could handle the stress.”
David kissed the top of her head, brushing her shoulder-length brown hair out of her face. “You know I love you to death, Jen,” he reassured her. “I’ll support you through whatever you decide. It is your baby after all.” He laid a hand on her stomach, feeling the bulge it was starting to take on.
“It’s our baby,” Jenna corrected him, laying her hand over his own. “And we have to make this decision together.” They shared a soft kiss, and Jenna laid her head back down.
David had been worried about her ever since Jenna told him she was pregnant. He had always toyed with the idea of being a father, but he’d never really anticipated it coming this soon. At the time they had married, sex was just sex; neither of them had conceived the idea of conceiving a child. But in all honesty, both of them had started to love the child already.
Jenna had been overcome with excitement when her doctor had first told her she was pregnant, but it was quickly overcome with a sense of worry. She wasn’t sure if David and her could care for a child if they continued living at his brother Drew’s house. Bless his heart, he was a wonderful man, but his landlord had increased the rent on the apartment since they had moved in, and David’s job as a DJ for hire around the area wasn’t bringing in enough money to pull their weight.
That was why they had applied for college, so they could get their degrees, move out and ease the pressure on Drew, and get well-paying jobs to take care of their baby.
But as they were going through the application process, the young couple had been wary about going through college with a child. They might not be able to keep up with the demands of student life, and manage to be good parents at the same time. And through this new thought, they had been giving serious consideration to . . . other procedures.
But Mr. Golding had been good to them, and suggested an option for them: he offered them the chance to take their classes mainly online, with the opportunity to sit in on any of them in person on-site. They were both extremely thankful for the compromise, and happily moved in as soon as they received their acceptance letters.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“And there we go, the last box, unpacked,” Jenna breathed out, exhausted from all the unpacking and stacking dishes in the cupboards. Between money from their partial tuition scholarships they earned when applying, and their student loan, they were able to afford one of the furnished apartments on campus. After moving all their belongings in, David and Jenna rested on the sofa of their large, green-walled living room.
“So, what do you think, baby?” David asked, putting his arm around his wife’s shoulder as she crossed one leg over the other.
“I think this is perfect,” she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “We can make this work.”
The apartment they had moved into was a one-floor building with an entrance hall, a family room with a couch and a television, a small kitchen branching off from the family room, and two bedrooms: one queen and one twin. The queen would be for them, and the twin would be perfect when the child came. It was good for the money they had paid, and hopefully they would have no trouble paying it off.
“I’m glad you think so.” David smiled at her, and they kissed. They spent several minutes kissing, then lay back leisurely on the sofa.
“I love you so much,” David said to her in the gentlest voice he could muster.
“I love you more.” Jenna snuggled up close to him, and smiled as he laid a hand on her stomach; the home of their baby.
“So what did you decide?” David asked, rubbing his hand around slowly.
“Well, I really want my degree, and a good job that I’ll like.” Jenna looked down at her stomach and placed her hand over David’s. “But I want to be a mommy.”
David laughed. “You’d be a wonderful mommy,” he told her. He felt her hand grip his as she smiled back.
“And you’d be an amazing daddy.” She kissed him once, and their hands moved together on her stomach.
“So, we’re not backing out of this?”
“Never. We’ll go through with it, together.”
“For better or worse,” David said, hugging her tightly.
“Till death do us part,” Jenna agreed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Starting the college year turned out to be more stress than they thought, as it had been a while since they had finished high school and gotten married. David’s parents and Jenna’s parents were both sympathetic, and often came to visit them to help with household chores and such, but they couldn’t stay for long, and David and Jenna began to get a good glimpse of married life.
When David had homework, Jenna would have to do the grocery shopping and the cleaning. While Jenna worked on assignments, David would pay the bills and handle the accounting to set money aside for their loan payments. When either of them attended a class on-site, the other would watch the apartment and take class over the computer. David also managed to get a part-time job as a secretary for a hospital in Fort Hood, a nearby city, which paid much more than what he used to make. With some smart saving skills, they started to have some money for themselves, and began painting and carpeting what would become the baby’s room.
They chose a light green wall with a simple white shag carpet. It was relatively unisex, and there was room for change depending on the baby’s gender. They were very proud of their work as married students so far. Their performance in their classes stayed consistently at A and B test and quiz scores, and as the bulge in Jenna’s belly grew larger, David resolved to be an even more caring and patient husband.
Their classmates were a little uncomfortable at first with married students among them, especially with Jenna’s pregnancy. But in time, they were welcomed and accepted into the community, and many of the students even admired them for such commitment to their marriage and their little one on the way. They became something of a campus legend, and there was even a headliner article about them in The Lone Star Junior, the weekly school paper.
One Friday evening, at 9:00, David came home from a class he attended, and he was concerned to see Jenna lying tiredly on the couch. Her hair, which she always worked to keep neat, was unruly and unkempt, and her eyelids drooped over bloodshot eyes that had barely any energy to greet David as he entered.
“What’s wrong, babe?” David asked, sitting down next to her on the sofa.
“Uhh,” Jenna moaned, managing to sit up with much effort. David caught her as she fell against him. “just had a late night last night, and I’ve been swamped with work, and just . . . you know.” She put her hand on her stomach and David got the message. It had been about six months, and she was now almost at full bulge.
David put Jenna’s rice bag in the microwave, heated it for a moment, and brought it back to her. She gave a small nod and put the warm bag on her forehead. It soothed her, and she reclined onto the large, puffy couch cushion with a sigh.
David sat close by her, holding her hand gently. “Should I call your teachers and tell them you need some, err, maternity leave?”
“No, I don’t think it’ll last the weekend. I’m sure I’ll be better tomorrow. Besides, I’m going in for an ultrasound on Sunday. We’re finally going to see our baby for the first time.” Jenna’s eyes seemed to brighten at the thought of seeing her child.
David looked up at the ceiling with her and adjusted the rice bag so it wouldn’t slip. “We’re really doing this, aren’t we?”
“Yes, we are. We are.” Jenna looked over at David and hugged him. “We’re making it through. And it’s all going to work. I know it.” She coughed away from David and lay back again.
“It may not seem like it, but these are some of the best years of our lives,” David attempted to reassure her in a cheery voice. He touched her shoulder and rubbed it gently.
“Maybe for you, but I’m still looking forward to the nights I can sleep easy again.” Jenna chuckled to herself lightly, but still didn’t breathed slowly in and out with exhaustion.
David helped her up off the couch and half-carried half-supported her as they slowly made their way to bed. He helped her lie down, kissed her on the top of the head, and left so that she could get some sleep. Besides, he’d be up for a while longer anyway, he had homework for Mr. Long in health class.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

On Sunday, Jenna indeed did feel much better, and was feeling perky and energized as they drove to the hospital for her ultrasound. When they arrived, Julia, her primary nurse for the duration of her pregnancy led her to the room where they’d hooked up all the equipment.
Jenna and David both greeted Dr. Kressel as they entered, and Jenna took her seat on the hospital bed next to the sonogram. He placed the sensor on her bulging stomach while David sat by and waited. After a moment of pushing buttons and clicking that David had watched aimlessly, accepting that he had no idea what any of it did, the monitor powered up, and they were able to see a gray, black, and white image of the fetus in Jenna’s stomach.
Jenna looked up and gave a large smile as she saw the image. David stepped up to the bedside and looked too. “That’s our little one,” he said without taking his eyes of the screen.
“Yes, it certainly is,” Dr. Kressel said, pushing a few more buttons. “And it looks like it’s a little baby girl.”
David looked down at his wife and put his hand next to the ultrasound sensor. “So, what are we going to name her?” He asked.
Jenna looked up at David and grinned. “I was thinking, and I like the name Misty,” she offered.
“That’s perfect. Misty Noland,” David said, liking the way it sounded when he spoke it. He took her hand and held it firmly.
She squeezed his hand back. “I’m going to be a mommy!” She said excitedly, shifting a bit in the hospital bed.
“I’m sure you’ll be a wonderful mommy and daddy,” Julia the nurse said, patting Jenna on the shoulder.
“Thank you Julia, you’ve been so good to us these past few months,” David thanked her, shaking her hand.
“It’s my pleasure. I love working with soon-to-be parents. Oh, and now that we’ve passed the six-month mark, it would be my recommendation to have these with you.” Julia handed them each a small device with a button. It was on a string, presumably to be work around the neck.
“These are medical buzzers. Since we’re now into the seventh month period, we have greater chances of labor happening when we can’t predict. You should be okay Jen, nothing looks out of place.” She turned off the sonogram and removed the sensor from Jenna’s stomach.
“But just in case, if you ever feel it coming on, just press this button, and we’ll send an ambulance to you,” Julia instructed.
“Thanks so much!” David said, shaking her hand again. Julia laughed and nodded to him.
Jenna got up from the hospital bed, nodded to Julia and Dr. Kressel, and walked out to the car with David. They both wore one of the buzzers around their neck, and those buzzers wouldn’t see any action for a while.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Into the third trimester of the year, everything started to calm down. David and Jenna both had all their schoolwork under control, and everything was going well in the household. Jenna even started an after-school activity where she talked about marriage, pregnancy, and parenthood. The turnout was incredible, and Jenna had a class of 30 or so girls every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday evening from 4:00 to 6:00 pm. Some of them had boyfriends, but most were single, eager to hear an opinion of relationships from a married woman.
Of course, when Jenna started to talk in-depth about married life in the second week, of course, a lot of the girls had the question of what sex was like. Jenna laughed when she heard it, and told them that it was a wonderful experience, and it was best to enjoy it when you’re married.
“You’d better not say anything embarrassing about me over there!” David called from the kitchen when she was finished with her answer. Everyone laughed at that.
They spent a long time asking Jenna questions about the baby: what were they going to name it, what was their plan for taking care of it, what type of room it was going to have, and things of that nature. David, who was washing dishes, threw in a side comment every few minutes, and was always greeted with several laughs.
David and Jenna went to the hospital on April 23rd, to hear a prediction from Dr. Kressel on when the baby would be born. After Julia checked them in, they went upstairs to his office.
“Well, good afternoon, both of you!” He said jovially, running a hand over his gray comb-over hair the way he always did when greeting.
“Hi Dr. Kressel,” Jenna replied. David nodded to him with a smile.
“Well, the computer’s finally finished working, and we’ve given an estimate that the baby will be born on May 8th,” he said, looking over some papers on his desk.
“Alright, that sounds good!” David said.
Jenna smiled and put a hand on her bulging stomach. She couldn’t wait for their child to be born.
“Remember, you have the buzzers, so if anything starts, just push the buttons, and we’ll send an ambulance your way. Julia and I will be dispatched with it, in case we don’t have time to make it back to the hospital,” he explained.
“Well, thank you very much, Dr. Kressel, we’ll be ready.” David stood with Jenna and shook the doctor’s hand.
“No problem. And here, take this note from me.” He handed a folded yellow piece of paper to each of them. “Doctor’s note, excusing you from class in the case of childbirth.” They all laughed at that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Alright class, pick up your pencils and begin testing,” professor Wilson instructed.
Jenna took one of her sharpened #2 pencils and began to look over the questions on the test. The first section was multiple choice, no problem for her, and she answered all 20 of the questions in just a few minutes.
As she started on the essay portion, the door of the class opened, and Mr. Golding entered. Jenna recognized him as the who’d interviewed her and David. He whispered something to professor Wilson, and she nodded.
As Jenna was halfway through answering the first essay question, she dropped her pencil. She felt convulsions in her stomach.
“Jenna, are you alright?” Mickayla, one of her classmates, who was also in her activity whispered.
Jenna felt more tremors, and struggled to find her words. “Mr. Golding!” She managed to call, right before he walked out of the door.
“What is it, Jenna?” He turned around and noticed her uncomfortable fidgeting.
“Go get David please. Tell him the baby’s on its way.” As Mr. Golding ran out of the room and down the hall, she heard all of her classmates gasp and look around nervously. With tremendous effort, and increasing difficulty to move her arms, she raised her had and pressed the button on her buzzer.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was May 1st. David was sitting in on his biology class, and Jenna was taking a test in her psychology class. They were both on campus, away from the apartment, and the two rooms they were in were in different buildings, but they felt as if today was important enough to both of them to show up in person.
David had just answered a question that professor Olson had asked, and was noting the diagram being written on the board, when Mr. Golding, the man who’d interviewed him and Jenna burst through the door of the classroom, his breath coming in heavy heaves, like he’d been running.
“David Noland,” he said, gesturing to David.
“What is it, Mr. Golding?” David asked nervously.
“It’s your wife. She’s gone into labor!” He said.
Amidst the gasps and nervous glances around from the other students, David hopped up out of his chair, handed his doctor note to professor Olson, and bolted out of the room in a mad dash for the campus infirmary. He knew that would be the first place they’d take her before the ambulance arrived.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jenna was thankful to see Dr. Kressel and Julia arrive in the infirmary and run up to her medical bed, bringing with them, a team of doctors with an array of equipment that she didn’t understand, but was comforted to see nonetheless. She was even more grateful when David burst through the door of her room and come up to her as well.
“I’m here,” he said softly, kissing her forehead.
“She’s coming,” was all Jenna could manage through the pain of her contractions and convulsions. She gripped David’s hand tightly, giving him a little sting as her fingernails poked his skin. But he wouldn’t dream of letting go.
Dr. Kressel talked all of the doctors through the process calmly and levelheaded, and David and Jenna were both comforted to see him handle everything so easily. After a few minutes, Dr. Kressel gave Jenna the proverbial “push” command, and like all the movies, the baby was out and crying for the first time.
Jenna deflated and fell back onto her cushion after giving birth. She was awake, but barely, as she heaved for breath until it came easily again after a few minutes.
Dr. Kressel and his team bathed the child and wrapped it in a soft blanket. David and Jenna, who were alone in her room now, anxiously waiting to see their child.
“You did it, babe,” David said to his wife softly. “We did it.”
Jenna smiled and looked at him through half-open eyes. “Now we have to be good parents.”
“We can. I know we can.” David squeezed her hand and she squeezed it back.
In a moment, Julia entered the room smiling. “Your child is perfectly healthy.”
“Thank you Julia, thank you so much,” David praised her. “You’re a wonderful nurse.”
Slowly, but with newfound energy, Jenna sat up and looked at Julia. “Where’s my baby?” She asked. “Can I see my baby girl?”
Julia nodded and left the room. She returned in a moment with a little bundle in her arms. “You two have a happy, healthy baby daughter.” She handed the little girl to Jenna, who gasped as she saw the little face with brown eyes and wispy hair.
“Oh my god,” she managed to squeak out through her joy.
David smiled just as big when Jenna handed the baby to him. “Hi there, Misty,” he said, touching the baby’s stomach with a gentle finger. She giggled, and he smiled even wider. He handed Misty back to Jenna.
“You were wrong David,” she said, chuckling.
“About what?”
She looked up at him and held up Misty. “This is the best day of our life.”
Would you kindly?




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Reviews 33
Oooh, this was really good. Now I'm not the grammer police or spelling nazi but this was really good. You took a lot of time on this and that's what makes it look good. I liked it. Are you going to write another one? This is really good and I liked it. I just think you moved too fast. What is David and Jenna's back ground? Where did they come from? Who's going to take care of Misty when their out? Marriage is not rainbows and butterflies. I would reccomend some fighting between the two, or David's reaction when Jenna told him she was pregnant?

Just a thought.
Good job and keep writing.

-Soggy.
Life isn't like a box of chocolates. Life is more like a jar of Jalapenos, what you do today might burn your rear tomorrow!




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Reviews 18
This was quite good, though I have to agree with SoggyPoptart there. Marriage isn't all rainbows and butterflies. There would be conflict, and most couples don't see eye to eye about everything.

Now, for the nit-picking. There were a few spelling errors.
There were framed pictures of him receiving awards, shaking hands with all sorts of people, students and teachers and faculty and such, and his own personal photos of him with his wife and two daughters in several countries.

This seemed to be a run on sentence to me, but then again, it's just my thought.

Also, at one month, there would NOT be a bulge. Not even close. From my Parenting class, I learned a bulge doesn't begin to appear until the 3rd month.

neither of them had conceived the idea of conceiving a child.

You have the same word here within the same sentence, just different tenses. Try something else. Instead of conceived, try "neither of then had thought of the idea of concieving a child."

then lay back leisurely on the sofa.

That should be laid, not lay,

Also, once more, most people can have an ultrasound by the 4th month to see the baby and determine the sex, but that's just a small thing. Some people opt out and have one later.

David and lay back again.

Once again, should be laid.

I think there's more, but I couldn't remember. Overall, the story was quite good, though the time frame moved a bit fast for my taste. Couples fight, show some vunerability to these two. There's no way they don't fight. Unless they are Barbie dolls, who are perfect. And we don't want characters that seem perfect, other wise they aren't too likeable. Well, I hoped this helped!

<3 Megan




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Whoah, Socks, are you seriously a 14 year old guy?! Sorry, this just seems like a very... mature, and very... well, girly peice. Not girly, that's not the right word... hehe... oh, don't pay attention to that I'm just kidding...

But onto the review...

Okie dokie, young people, having a baby and going through school... it's kind of like vampire stories, you have to do it right. And, look, this wasn' t bad, but... something was missing. I can tell you what was missing. Conflict. David and Jenna were SO happy ALL the time... gah, it was annoying! (sorry, I find happiness obnoxious) Another thing I could use a boatload more of: emotion! Not just emotion, but, like, what's going through their heads? Like, how did David feel about having a girl? Had he wanted a boy? Was it exactly what he wanted? Also, I didn't get much freaking-out from Jenna or David when the baby was coming...

Okay... well... in conclusion I liked this, but I was kind of disapointed that the main emotion in this story was happiness. It would be a really stressful situation... Jenna should throw something, David should kick a whole in a wall, and they should both cry their eyes out (those are just suggestions ;))

I think you could make this even better... I hope this helped!

--

Tabby




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I really like this story. The plot is good, and the characters are very believable. I wouldn't mind spending an afternoon with them. Please bear in mind that this is one of my favorite stories I've read on here when I go on to tell you what I think is less than stunning about your story.

1. Your dialogue sounds a little superficial. He's always happy, she's always happy. They sounds like the sort of idealistic family that just doesn't exist these days. Maybe if you added some less-than-overjoyed feeling to this (And that bit where Jenna is really tired/exhausted doesn't count), it might come across as more realistic.

2. The couple never fights. Not even about the name of their baby, for crying out loud! In my mind, that should be a matter of much discussion. They should have to persuade one another to go with a name. Having him just agree right away seems to perfect.
Also, maybe they could have some sort of small tiff about who gets to go to class on a particular day, or about who needs to run to the store for groceries. If you still want to keep this a happy story, it could end with her bursting into tears and running to him for comfort.

Now to some smaller issues. Please bear in mind that these are just my opinions and feel free to ignore them all.
~Really? 'Misty' for the name of a kid? If I had a horse, I might name it that. But for a baby girl? Plus, how would it sound when she got in trouble? Let's face it, she would get shouted at some time. How does it sound if someone says, "MISTY! Get down here!" Right, it sounds wrong somehow. I understand that you are going for a beautiful name, probably something elegant and refined, but not sounding like it belongs to a 75 year-old woman. Why don't you try Tanya, or Amelia?

~ HOLY CRAP! Are you really a 14-year old guy? I go to a public school with a class of 400 kids in just my grade, and I have NEVER met a guy mature enough to write this. Ever. Matter of fact, I didn't know there was a guy who could write this mature. Wow... Hope to read more by you!

OVERALL:
This is a very good story. There are a few elements that need refining, but other than that this is something I would love to read. If your other stories are of this same quality, maybe you want to consider submitting them to a magazine or website? If you are interested, send me a message or leave a note on my profile!
Colossal Compendium of Complications and Confusion = MY LIFE



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