Sweet Tainted Lie...

She dances like an angel:
So beautiful, and graceful;
Arms outstreched towards the skies,
Shimmering hair and deep, dark eyes.

White cloths draped on her shoulders,
Light booties on her feet.
Cheeks are blushing rosily
in the cozy heat.

A smile is painted luciously
on deep-filled blood-red lips,
While an audience claps, eagerly;
believing what they see.

Her eyes can tell her story,
But nobody can see;
For who would look that closely
at perfect, tainted beauty...?

WOW! wicked the first one of your happy poems lol it's really good i love the but where you put here eys tell a story, it's dead good loving it ssoooooooo much keep it up emma. you could probabily tell a bit of the story behind her eyes or would that ruin it your choice really!!!! xxxx

This is really good emma. its really insightful ! keep it up xx

I knew it. You write beautifully. This seems so perfect for the holiday season especially.

I was looking for a nitpick but I honestly could not find one. So this will be a rather unconstructive review. Oh well.

Emmzziee wrote:She dances like an angel: A colon introduces a list of thing. ( I am sure you know that.) You can get rid of the colon and put a period. Also you may want to reword the first line.
So beautiful, and graceful; Here again if you keep the colon from before this should be a period
Arms outstreched towards the skies,It would be more poetic if you said her arms were reaching for the skies. Some thing along thoughs line.
Shimmering hair and deep, dark eyes. This is one of my favorite line from the poem.

White cloths draped her shoulders, This makes it sound as if she has line pieces of cloth just laying on her shoulders. I don't if you were going to that.
Light booties on her feet. booties seems out of place in this poem.
Cheeks are blushing rosily,
in the cozy heat.

A smile is painted luciously,
on deep-filled blood-red lips. Also deep-filled doesn't make sense.
While an audience claps, eagerly;
believing what they see.

Her eyes can tell her story,
But nobody can see.
For who would look that closely
at perfect, tainted beauty...?

How is she tainted. My point is the poem is based on how she is basically fake, but you never say Why.

I really enjoyed this poem, however the rhyme scheme needs some work. Seems as if you just threw in words that rhyme here and there. It makes for a bumpy rhythm. Your punctuation was a little off in places also. I really liked it though. Its almost there, just work a little more.

I really liked this, i read the first line and wanted to read so much more, seriously good and keep it up