About love

When night time comes and heat is gone
And all you see is him alone
It's than when you just realise
That it's the time, and there's the right.

He takes your hand, and you forget
All that you had is just a mass
Of things and thoughts and nothing's worth
The time you spend in his alcove.

The moon will whisper with the wind
And you will hear cicada sing.
The verse that blows away all fear,
And leaves you open and sincere.

Hi there,
I like the cadence of this piece. It flows nicely. Actually, I just like the whole poem. It's tone is serious, yet romantic, and the imagery is sound, but not over-the-top, and the diction is thoughtful. My only complaint is that the second stanza is a little vague, or the flow between the last two lines in that stanza is off or something. However, I could just be tired. Also, "realize" and "then" are spelled wrong in the third line of the first stanza. Thanks for sharing this piece!

elephantwalrus wrote:Hi there,
I like the cadence of this piece. It flows nicely. Actually, I just like the whole poem. It's tone is serious, yet romantic, and the imagery is sound, but not over-the-top, and the diction is thoughtful. My only complaint is that the second stanza is a little vague, or the flow between the last two lines in that stanza is off or something. However, I could just be tired. Also, "realize" and "then" are spelled wrong in the third line of the first stanza. Thanks for sharing this piece!

I know i have some problems with spelling, as I'm always writing in the night, when I'm tired, it's the best time when my mind is really clear and I can write true things and thoughts.
But anyway I'm happy that you liked my piece Thank you.

Hey! I really like this poem. it has a really nice flow to it. I like the sensory to it. Great job.

Hey there! I love the simplicity of your writing and the beauty that comes from just a few chosen words. There are a few spelling errors, but you've got it going for you! Great work!

Kool!
Sorry! I don't know what else to say! I'm really bad at writing reviews!

Wondergirl59 wrote:Hey! I really like this poem. it has a really nice flow to it. I like the sensory to it. Great job.

Thank you very very very much)))))

Butterfinger wrote:Hey there! I love the simplicity of your writing and the beauty that comes from just a few chosen words. There are a few spelling errors, but you've got it going for you! Great work!

Thank you very much. I know i have mistakes, but as i wrote above, i usually work at night....

skebe wrote:Kool!
Sorry! I don't know what else to say! I'm really bad at writing reviews!

Don't worry! Any review makes me happy