Defiance (Chapter 1)

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This is a story for my lovely little brother Declan. Most of the story is his idea, so if at times it sounds cliche, I'm blaming him.

NOTE: The title has changed! :)

"Thoro, get your work done. Just show us some magic, for god???s sake."

The kid huffed, and crossed his arms. He shifted uncomfortably under the professor's exasperated glare, and looked away.

"I can't, sir," said the kid. "You know I can't. Stop hassling me."

The professor clicked his tongue, disappointed.

"Well it's about time you did," he said, "your grades count on it. How can a teacher mark you if you haven't developed any magical powers yet?" The question was asked to the air, as if somehow the professor would be able to get an answer from it. He stalked off, upset, to attend to another student's needs.

Thoro stared back down at the oak table. A daisy flower, small and delicate, rested on the table. Today's afternoon session was supposed to be spent using each student's imagination and magical abilities to transform or create something special and unique with the flower presented to them. The student on Thoro's left, a thin, mousy-blonde boy, swooshed his hands around his flower, making it change colours. The student on the kid's right, a freckled, slightly chubby boy, however, was red in the face, trying to make the flower sing a lullaby. For all his efforts, the flower wasn't doing want he wanted: instead of humming a harmonious tune, it was screeching in pain.

The freckled boy lowered his swishing hands and the screeching stopped at once. The flower, which had once been upright on its stem, flopped back to the table like it was exhausted. The boy took a few deep breaths, rubbed his forehead, and nudged Thoro.

"I don't know why I can't make it sing. It keeps screaming at me."

Thoro leaned his crossed arms over the table. "At least you can make it do something," he muttered, and blew a long strand of black hair out of his face that had fallen there.

The freckled boy crunched his teeth together awkwardly, aware that he had said the wrong thing.

"Maybe I should try make it talk??? maybe it might talk."

"Do whatever, Box. And least you won't fail." Thoro turned away to the window to observe the delicately clear-blue sky.
Box said nothing, unsure of how to answer. He decided to ignore the comment, and continue on with his project. Raising his hands, he focused all of his willpower and magic on the one flower. The daisy sat up, coughed, then suddenly burst out into a round of foul swearing. Thoro giggled into his arms.

"It's not funny!" whined Box, who immediately dropped his hands to silence the flower. To his horror, the flower didn't stop. In fact, it seemed to be enjoying itself, and did a dance around the table, hollering a display of terrible, dirty words. Thoro went from giggling to full out laughter.

"Box!" boomed the professor from across the room. "Shut that flower up!"

"I'm tryin', professor, really, I'm tryin'!"

Box shaked his hands in a frenzy, but his attempt was worthless. He just wasn't magical enough in his current state to stop the noise.

He swallowed, knowing what had to be done. Blushing, he closed his eyes, and a sparkling pair of pink fairy wings came unrolling from his back. The wings unwrinkled themselves with a few shakes and raised themselves in the air.

Immediately the class roared, pointing and jeering at him. The freckled boy's face went a deeper shade of crimson. His wings shimmered, and finally the flower froze, like thief who had just been caught stealing.

Thoro???s own laughter seized. He didn???t appreciate bullying in any form, especially if it was aimed at one of his mates. He scanned the room, becoming increasingly furious with every laughing face he made eye contact with.

But when he saw the teacher laughing along too, a rage boiled in the pit of his stomach. Humiliation from the teacher just wasn???t right. He stood up and slammed his gloved fists on the table. The long, blue-streaked fringe that had been tucked behind his ear fell out again.

???Shut up! Just because you don???t have wings, doesn???t mean you can be mean!???

At once, the students nearest Thoro mumbled something about it being funny. Some snorted, and some made side comments just loud enough for Thoro to hear they were saying something, but not loud enough for him to catch the words.

If the sudden stop of laughter was thought to make Box feel better, it did the opposite. He groaned softly and quickly hid his face under a mask of chubby fingers.

???And you!??? Thoro yelled at his professor. ???Why are you laughing????

The professor drew himself up and wiped away his expression of hilarity, to replace it with a sly smile.

???The same reason why you can???t produce any magical powers, Thoro Tor.???

A synchronised ???Ooo??? rumbled from the class. Thoro???s stomach twisted in embarrassment, but he persisted.
???Teachers don???t bully students, Mr. Dactyle. Thought you knew that, being a teacher. Guess not.???

An ???Ooo??? again from the class.

Mr Dactyle sniggered. ???Students don???t answer back to teachers, Tor. You can hang back after school. You deserve punishment for that snide remark.???

-x-x-x-

Stupid Mr. Dactyle. Stupid class. Stupid everything. All I want to do is to go home.

Thoro kicked a loose pebble from the cobblestone ground. He was leaning against the outer wall of his classroom, waiting for Mr. Dactyle to return. In a line just to his right was an array of thick, deep purple bushes with light, scarce tops, that swayed with the breeze. Out of curiosity, Thoro lifted his leg and kicked it tenderly. The bush???s spiky leaves cut into his flesh and Thoro pulled back his leg with a surprised cry.

Sharp. Just like the rest of the school. Sharp, and boring.

If you could imagine the coldest, simplest room, and then imagine it full of wooden tables and a class of pre-adolescent, lower-class students, and then count another fifty rooms to make up the whole school, then you???ve just imagined Lower Larak Primary.

Thoro loathed every inch of the school. He would have much rather attend Dash West Primary. Every inch of that school is an unreachable dream: From the waterfall cascading off the barrier off the cliff the school rests on, to the luscious, gigantic maple trees engulfing the school???s barrier, to the force field around it that keeps in its students and its eternally-perfect weather. But a), Thoro???s family are barely able to scrounge enough money for food, let alone a fancy prep school, and b), the school would never accept a non-magical student. All of its pupils are of high-class magical bloodlines, or naturally gifted. No place for a reject like me.

Thoro glanced down at his leg. A bubbling red rash of sorts had blossomed across his skin where the bush had cut him. A throbbing desire to itch it like mad pulsed through the infected area. He used his nails to scratch it, but the contact with his fingers transferred the rash there.

So it???s a magically poisonous bush. Super. Why would they plant a magically poisionous bush in a school, anyway?
He needed to put water, or ice, or something on it. He started to jog to the medical ward, but an unseen force smacked him in the face and knocked him off his feet.

Rubbing his forehead with one hand, and itching his leg with another, he glanced up at the piece of sky that had suddenly decided to hit him. It flickered in the light slightly, and at once Thoro groaned.

He completely forgot that when Mr. Dactyle said stay put, he wasn???t asking. Thoro was literally confined in a force field of the teacher???s own doing.

A chuckle from behind him made him rigid. The force field disappeared with a shimmer and pop, and Thoro heard approaching footsteps from behind him. He craned his head to peek at the forthcoming person, and immediately scrambled to his feet.

???Sarahine!??? he breathed with a wide grin.

The woman named Sarahine took long steps and crossed the distance between Thoro and herself in a matter of seconds. She winked down at him and smiled, revealing a piercing on the inner skin of her lips. Her towering height forced Thoro to look up just to see her face. A ripple of dark brown hair glided past her shoulders as she was forced to do the opposite and look down at him.

???Hey, champ!??? she said, with a playful slap to his shoulder.

???Sarahine!??? he repeated. ???What??? I though Mr. Dactyle--- what????

???Careful there, bud. Don???t strain yourself. I was asked to watch over you for a while, just until he returns.???

Thoro frowned. ???So??? you???re not taking punishment????

???Unfortunately, no. But I???ll chill with you until he comes.???

Sarahine walked to the classroom door and swung it open.

???Come on inside, Thoro,??? she asked sweetly. She glanced down at his leg. ???We???ll get that cleaned up.???

???Sure,??? he replied, ecstatic.

Sarahine was Thoro???s only adult friend, and the only teacher on the world that Thoro had respect for. She was ever so kind to him, and didn???t treat him like a freak or an outcast.

The other month, Thoro was roaming the schoolyards in a terrible temper. He had had a rowing fit with the herbal and flora teacher about the importance of technology, and the teacher had ended up calling Thoro names just to get him upset and distracted from the argument at hand. Sarahine had caught up with him, and demanded to know what was on his mind.

He had explained to her that he was fed up with being labelled an outcast by the adults, and fed up with the unprofessionalism the school displayed. He just wanted to get his powers already so it would stop all of the ridicule.
Sarahine told him to sit down at the nearest bench, because she had something to tell him. She broke out into a story of her childhood.

Sarahine knew exactly how Thoro felt, to an extent. She hadn???t received her magical abilities until the age of eleven, a year later then it is medically accepted to occur. The doctors called her abnormal, and couldn???t comprehend why she wasn???t developing. She did get them eventually, and it did end all the jeering, but she???d never forgotten the pain and humiliation.

Thoro immediately understood why Sarahine had always been so sweet to him. She sympathized with his situation. And ever since then, they had been pretty close. Despite the fact that Thoro was a couple of years older than Sarahine was when she received her powers, he still greatly appreciated her support.

Thoro followed Sarahine inside. Already she was muttering to a floating ball of blue energy cupped in the palms of her hands.

Thoro smiled, and leaned against a wall until she had finished speaking. Of course, he would have much rather use a cool ball of energy himself to make communicative calls. But no, he got stuck with a technological device he liked to call a connector, because not only was he not magical, but technology was a lot cheaper to run then hiring a professional pixie to enchant you with the bonus permanent ability.

Too bad a pixie couldn???t just give me a power in the first place. Maybe then I???d actually be accepted.

It???s not that Thoro didn???t like technology. He loved it. In fact, he was brilliant with it. He???d always repair his classmates??? tech toys or games. It was for this reason that most of his peers didn???t personally pick on him. If you laugh, he used to say, then you???re daft, because I won???t fix it. But it just would have been so much more awesome to have a ball of energy.

Sarahine???s energy ball dissolved into the air.

???Thoro, I???ve called the medical ward for a soothing cream. Seems like they???ve had a few complaints about rashes similar to yours this week. What did you cut yourself on????

Thoro grimaced, and pointed out through the window. ???Those purple bushes outside.??? The sudden reminder that the rash was there made him scratch it again.

Sarahine nodded, and then aahed, as if an unspoken question had been answered.

???Gardeners planted those the other week and gave them growing spray. Maybe that???s why they???re poisonous. Growing spray's side effects can be pretty nasty.???

Thoro knew this. His own father had used the same stuff on the trees out in his own backyard when he was ten. The trees soon after turned out to develop hideous wooden warts.

The pair of them heard a whoosh that was punctured by some crack and snap noises. Sarahine quickly hurried to the door to greet a floating ball of white energy that carried in its centre a jar full of green ooze. She removed the jar and the ball dissolved.

The woman opened the jar with her long fingers, and passed it over to the kid, whose leg was propped up on a chair.
Thoro took one sniff of the cream???s fumes and gagged. ???Eww.???

???Trust me, it will help,??? Sarahine assured him with a little smile.

Holding his breath, Thoro dove his fingers into the goo, scooped some of it up and slopped it onto the rash. At once, a hissing sound emitted from the rash, and a line of steam rose up into the air. Thoro sighed in relief.

???That???s heaps better,??? he said, spreading the rest of the concoction around until the rash and the cream vanished, leaving a pinkish tinge behind. ???Thanks.???

???No worries, champ. Just tell me you won???t go touching unknown bushes from now on.???

???I promise.??? Thoro passed the jar back to Sarahine, who screwed the lid back on again. With a swoosh of her fingers, she conjured up another ball of energy that was pure white, just like the one that carried the jar here. She placed the jar in the centre and whispered to it. The energy ball then shot through the door- past the figure standing in the entrance.

???Mr. Dactyle,??? Thoro said dully.

???Obviously,??? Mr. Dactyle said, the word laced with sarcasm. ???Miss Mor, you are dismissed.???

Sarahine nodded. ???Yes, Dactyle.??? She scrambled past Mr. Dactyle and left the room without another sound.

???Now, Thoro, we have some discussion to do.???

Thoro was about to answer back, but he froze. Something was wrong. There was a malice glint in his professor???s eyes, and in his teacher???s hand a glowing ball of flame was forming.

???But I don???t want discussion, Thoro. I???m sick of you.???

Mr. Dactyle moved a step closer.

???I was rejected for the teaching job at Dash West Primary. And you want to know why, Thoro? Because of you, I was considered an ineffective teacher. Ineffective? I???ve been wanting that job my whole life, Thoro. My. Whole. Life.???

Thoro???s eyes darted around. Mr. Dactyle was blocking the only exit from this room.

???And you know what else I was thinking? I was thinking how useless you are. You???re not magical, and your family???s dirt poor and broken. Who???s going to miss a worthless runt like you????

Thoro made a run to the window, but a flame shot past him and the wall behind him instantly caught on fire.

???I want to kill something, Thoro. I want to kill you.???
Last edited by Maddy on Tue Feb 15, 2011 8:18 am, edited 2 times in total.
-If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you!
-"Careful with that light at the end of the tunnel, it might be another train coming."

This awesome post bought to you by me. :)




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This story is AMAZING Maddy! I truly love it! Although there were a few things that weren't quite right. Nothing major, just a few little errors.
Maddy wrote:...his gloved fist on the table. The long, blue-streaked fringe that had been tucked behind his ear fell out again.

I think you meant ear and not hair... because you don't really tuck your fringe behind your hair.
There was something else, I think you said 'then' instead of 'than' somewhere...
Anyway I loved how you used 'the kid' and 'the woman' even after we already knew their names.
This piece is very creative. I truly love it! :)
Congrats Madz, keep going with this story 'cause it rules!
Smashles
We all have moments of desperation, but if we face them head on, that's when we find out just how strong we really are. - Mary-Alice Young, Desperate Housewives




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Hey there, Maddy!

I swear, little brothers can come up with the most interesting things. Sure, there is some cliché in there, I’ll give it that, but it’s still sweet.
And sometimes it’s more about execution than anything else.

I won’t nitpick (I’m too sleepy to nit pick so it would just be back for you) but I will say that somewhere in there, for whatever reason, your dialogue marks turned into ???
Overall, this reminds me of the tv shows that I used to watch on Saturday morning. A little bit of this and a little bit of that with a dash of Harry Potter in the middle. But it’s rather refreshing to read. ^^

One thing to be careful of is that everything, wording wise, is clean. Always take time to read it out loud or have your bother read it out load/read it to your brother. That way you can both hear if there are any mistakes.

Lastly, make sure that you set up clear, definite rules about the world that you’re writing about. Otherwise, it can get a good deal confusing. What kinds of powers can people have? At what age do they get their powers. Things like that. And write them down so when you write something, you can double check that it stays within the rules of the world.

Overall, though, it’s a nice start. If you have any questions, feel free to send me a PM or a message or whatever.

~lilymoore
Never forget who you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.



My tongue must tell the anger of my heart, or else my heart, concealing it, will break...
— Katherine, The Taming of the Shrew