Tired

Of this mundane life.
One of anonymity,
liberating at first,
but becomes a part of the soul as time passes.

This life was meant to be lived in light, not in shadows,
but I chose my paradise in darkness.

Now my life is defined by my invisibility,
my past contorting everything in present to unrecognizable
horrors.

I am tired of being twisted, abused, and mistreated.
My discontent has grown to hatred, to scorn for those who have led me to this path.
To this darkness I now know as my reality.

I am tired of this place, this unforgiving world,
with no love, no compassion for another soul.

My life means nothing to those mindless creatures.
To those who rule our realm with an iron fist.

I am tired of their tyranny,
their ignorance,
and every intolerance we see before us.

I am a shadow though, a ghost,
and in this life i can do nothing, but watch as they destroy everything I love.

I really like this I can relate to how you feel. The first three lines confused me, but other than that it was amazing. Pm me if you write anymore.

sorry about that. look at the title, and then read the first line. your supposed to read the first line right after. Its a technique I use.

I agree that the first verse is kinda confusing, I just don't get it. The rest is good though, and I got the message really clearly. Remember that you don't have to necessarily put commas and periods where you would in a story, because poetry's a little different. In poetry a period, comma, etc. signifies a break, so only stop it when you need to. Other than that, nice poem.

Those breaks were intentional. And as for the first stanza you are supposed to read ti with the title. Like Tire of, together.

Also thank you both for your comments they really help.

I really liked your poem.I loved the second stanza.

Just about everyone is tired of life in one way or another, and I felt tired of this poem from the first line, since the topic was cliche, and it was not explored in any new or innovative way, and thus made the poem a bit of a chore to read.

So - firstly, for what you were writing (and then how). This makes me wonder why I read poetry - to escape the world, or to find my place more firmly in it? The narrator of this poem is depressed. Fine. Why do I care? The poem is likewise depressed. The narrator cannot find a more intriguing manner of saying they're depressed other than saying it - mundane, tired, shadows, darkness, invisibility, horrors, twisted, abused, mistreatment, discontent, hatred, scorn, nothing, mindless, tyranny, ignorance, intolerance, ghost, destruction - this reads like one great big list of synonyms to me, none of which is particularly exciting, or adds a deeper layer to the one before it. It's just meh.

The way it was written was...dull. So the narrator is sad of this life, sick of it, tired of it, hates it. And? What's the point of that? What did I gain from reading this that I didn't already know? There's no interesting spin to keep me hooked, no interesting imagery to drive the poem - just a series of ramblings on the part of the narrator that are totally grey as far as I'm concerned.

I'm sure there are better ways of addressing this topic. You don't need to address depression by sounding depressed. In fact, if you put it in a more different light, or string it along with an overarching image, that might work much better than just stating the facts. Since I really feel nothing from it...except about as bored of the poem as the narrator is bored of life.

I don't really care if it's dull to you Navita. Seriously if you take the time to write such a long comment to insult me then I must be doing something right. The thing is this poem has already been published in a magazine so your opinion does not really matter on this poem. If you are not going to leave constructive criticism then don't leave any at all. It's fine that you don't like it, but please don't waste my time with such vague criticism. If you want it "better" then tell me more of what you would like to see in detail.