why write a poem about not liking writing poems there is no point
Know that she's back in the atmosphere I'm afraid that she'll think of me as a plain old Jain told a story 'bout a man who was to afraid to fly so he never did land. ~Train
Why? Because writing is habitual and if you want to get good at it, you must do it even when you don't particularly want to.
In my opinion, it's more important to try writing and to fail than to not try and never know. Think of all of the things that wouldn't be published today if the author had never just sat down and wrote. Yes? No? Maybe so?
Also, I never said I didn't like poetry. You made that impression. Which is okay because poetry is always open for interpretation.
"Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass." - Anton Chekhov
Greetings I'm LastPaladin, I'm sorry to say I didn't like this, but why you ask. Well it tries to be witty and it's not. It's not creative it's being navelgazing. Sure there is some lovely images. But nothing caught me about this, nothing really made me feel. And if laughter is what you wished then you didn't get that. You can elaborate on each of these images and maybe it could be strengthened but right now this is just a few lines that does nothing for readers. Believe it or not there is a thing called being too subtle and you are definitly to subtle.
So, cut comedy, quit being cheeky and expecting laugh, and do more to this. It's saving grace is this, the lines are pretty original. Which shows you have skill, trust me you can do great if you put your mind to it.
Hope this helps.
You poor take courage You rich take care This earth was made a common treasury For everyone to share All things in common All people one We come in peace The orders came to cut them down
Your imagery is effective and surprising, but why write a poem about not wanting to? You have such excellent potential for this poem, but it ends up being a waste of time to read when we find out that the author isn't really interested in the subject matter. Now, you may personally feel differently, but if you wanted the reader to walk away thinking otherwise, I suggest you change the wording in order to make your feelings more clear. Also, the title of the poem seems disconnected with the actual poem; but then again, leave it to me with my eyes blind to abstract connections.
Really, I think you should change the ending, but all of this is subjective. Only the artist can make that decision. Regardless, best wishes and keep writing!
–antimelrose
Sabbatical isn't the right word, but it almost is. loves like a hurricane/i am a tree/bending the weight of his wind and mercy/dcb grace finds beauty in everything... makes beauty out of ugly things/U2
Sealegs, again, you nailed it. Short poems like this are tricky because EVERY word has to be perfect, and so does the title. And actually, I once published a poem about having difficulty writing poems, so don't be so hard on yourself. This short form allows you to have colossal strength... you just have to find it, and in this one I feel it, the sea legs and coals are a perfect pair in the first stanza.
