Ch2 Part 2

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Ch 2 Part 2
Chris then shows her the upstairs bathroom. The bathroom has a tall shower with different types of showerheads. Then there is also a Jacuzzi tub. The bathroom counter has two sinks one for Chris and the other is his mothers. The wall behind the Door is a cabinet that Chris and his mother shared to put their bath products. Chris and Kaelynne then go to his room.

Chris’ room has Royal purple walls and a Dark green carpet. On the wall to the right of the door Chris has a flat screen TV. To the left of the door is Chris’ bed which is just a plain wooden bed and a wooden dresser for his clothes. Kaelynne gets as far as the door and is frozen in place.
“You can go in you know.” Chris says.
“Oh, sorry I was just shocked by see your room I’ve pictured your room over and over in my head so see it is a total shock. Your room is definitely not what I pictured. “Kaelynne states.
“What did you picture my room of looking like I’m curious?”
“I pictured the walls a dark shade of blue or black and the carpet to be the same as your mom’s red but blood red. Don’t ask me why because I don’t know. Also I pictured your room to be much bigger. Your bed is perfect it’s the same as I pictured it, and I love it. “Kaelynne explains.

“Wow, I like your description of my room better than my own room. Except I like my royal purple walls, better than blue or black.” Chris tells Kaelynne.

“Do you want to sit; you can sit on my bed.” Chris informs Kaelynne.

“Sorry if I seem like I’m uncomfortable in your room. It’s just that I’ve never been in a guy’s room, and I definitely haven’t sat a guy’s bed.”

“You seem fine; I know this is new to you. Do you want to watch a movie or something on cable?” Chris asks.

“Sure lets watch TV. Gilmore Girls is on. I don’t need to watch it I’ve seen every episode more than once. Is there anything on that you want to watch. “Kaelynne says.
“We can watch Gilmore Girls I don’t mind. Come sit near me at the top of my bed.” Chris says.

Kaelynne then moves up towards Chris and leans against him and watches Gilmore Girls. Chris rubs Kaelynne’s arms and back and tries to relax her. Kaelynne begins to relax and cuddles up with Chris. They watch the episode in season two when jess and Rory study together and jess and her get into an accident while they were going to get ice cream . Rory breaks her arm and her mom Lorelai freaks out that Jess got into an accident while Rory was in the car. Afterward they watch the movie ponyo. The movie is about a fish that turns into a human girl. Kaelynne sit together with Chris and wishes it could last forever.

“I wish I could cuddle forever in your arms. You make me feel safe in your arms like nothing could ever hurt me again even myself.” Kaelynne whispers to Chris.

“I wish you could too, I will protect you from all the harm I can protect you from and I will try as hard as I can to save you from yourself.” Chris Whispers to Kaelynne.

Kaelynne then starts and Chris wraps his arms around her tries to calm her down. When he calms her down enough to where she is only sobbing he says. “I love you so much Kaelynne a few years ago I would have never thought I was even worthy of anyone. At the beginning of this year I did not plan to fall in love with such an amazing girl. But I did and I’m extremely glad. I believe we can get through a lot. You can tell me anything, and I will tell you I love you and your beautiful every day. Even when others are near, I’m not like any of those guys who are afraid to day things in front of their friends or family because they don’t know what others will say.”

“I love you too Chris Alpine, every day I wonder how I can deserve someone so caring, sensitive, and understanding. My whole life I never believed I would fall in love, and now that I am I don’t ever want to let you go. I’m also not afraid to tell you I love you front of others. I don’t care what others say that I’m too young to be in love. I love you more than I love myself.” Kaelynne announces.

“You deserve a lot more than you think you do. I wish you would love yourself more because everyone needs to love themselves. I am going to change your opinion of yourself by telling you that you are extremely beautiful. Whenever you need to talk to someone either call me or come see me and I will be there for you.” Chris informs.

“I am also available for you twenty-four /seven if you need to talk to me . I will listen to whatever you have to say don’t be afraid to tell me anything. I love you and I don’t care what you do or say I will still love you no matter what.” Kaelynne says.

Kaelynne and Chris just sit on his bed for hours talking and not talking. They just sit there and stare into each other’s eyes. They also start to make out and Kaelynne tells Chris it can’t go any further than kissing because she is not ready. Chris tells Kaelynne that he is not ready either, he tells Kaelynne he will do nothing if Kaelynne doesn’t want to or is not ready for yet. When Ponyo ends they decide to just listen a CD. Chris put a Linkin Park CD in and they just kiss and listen to Linkin Park until five o’clock.

At five o’clock Kaelynne and Chris go to his family’s diner and order supper then they go to the park and eat their food that Chris had his mom put in take out containers. Chris and Kaelynne find a big tree and sit under the tree and eat. Chris and both got Pancakes and eggs to share for supper. Kaelynne and Chris eat and talk for while.

“I love pancakes for supper if I could I would eat then every day. You and pancakes go together, but sorry pancakes I love Chris more.”

“I feel so special I am loved more than pancakes.” Chris cheers.

“Are you making fun of me? I do love you more than pancakes but they are right behind you.” Kaelynne says.
"Love is only a chapter in a guy's life , For a girl its the whole book <3 "




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I love your story! It filled my heart and is so amazing to read!

Also I love when you wrote,
You and pancakes go together, but sorry pancakes I love Chris more.”


That was funny. :lol:

Don't forget to private message me when you write more! cant wait!!

-Lily <3
Be yourself
And no one else
dance to the beat
and loose control
Never forget who you are
Be an unforgettable shining star*




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Points 2020
Reviews 87
The story starts out good when you are describing the rooms that they go into. There were a few places though that I thought could use some work:

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:Then there is also a Jacuzzi tub.


When I read this sentence I thought that it sounded awkward. I suggest removing the 'Then' at the beginning of the sentence, or combining this sentence with the one before it to make it sound better.

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:To the left of the door is Chris’ bed which is just a plain wooden bed and a wooden dresser for his clothes.


It sounds weird to have 'bed' twice in this sentence. Possibly rewording the beginning part of the sentence when you are describing the bed to make it flow better could help.

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:“Oh, sorry I was just shocked by see your room. I’ve pictured your room over and over in my head so seeing it is a total shock. Your room is definitely not what I pictured. “Kaelynne states.


1) End the first sentence after 'room'.
2) In the second sentence 'see' should be 'seeing'.

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:“What did you picture my room of looking like? I’m curious.


Make this quote into two sentences. End the question after 'like', and make 'I'm curious.' a statement.

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:Your bed is perfect. It’s the same as I pictured it, and I love it. “Kaelynne explains.


Start a new sentence after 'perfect'.

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:“Sorry if I seem like I’m uncomfortable in your room. It’s just that I’ve never been in a guy’s room, and I definitely haven’t sat on a guy’s bed.”


Just missed the word 'on' :)

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:Kaelynne then starts and Chris wraps his arms around her tries to calm her down.


Starts what?

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:“I love you so much. Kaelynne a few years ago I would have never thought I was even worthy of anyone.


End the first sentence after 'I love you so much.'

Whitedwarf3821 wrote:“I love you too Chris Alpine, every day I wonder how I can deserve someone so caring, sensitive, and understanding.


Again start second sentence at 'Every day'.

Well, this was all I could find that was wrong. It's nothing that a little re-reading can't fix. Other then these things I though that the story was really well written. It has a very good story line. I enjoyed this piece very much.



If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.
— Oscar Wilde