Oblivion's Circus--prologue

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This is an extremely random prologue for a story I have been to write for a long time. Neither of these two wonderfully dashing entertainers are the main character, as the main character is rather different. But I hope you would have fun reading this and questions/comments/suggestions are always appriciated. Hope you enjoy!



The night was cold and clear. The stairs gazed down from their perch in the heavens at the dark and silent world below them. From the city by the sea, to a town nestled in the mountains, darkness was triumphant and all was still ...

A branch deposited a heavy handful of snow into the bank on the ground, though in the silence, the muffled thump seemed more like a clap of thunder. Finnabar shivered, drawing the thread-bare pale green cloak tighter about his narrow shoulders as he slowly picked his way through the deep snow. In the midlde of the Minth forest, there was no one to hear him but the wolves, howling sleepily in the distance. But Finnabar was moving carefully. It seemed that everytime he made a noise too loud, the trees frowned down on him and as there was a particularly loud crunch from beneath his worn boots, he flinched. Tighting his hands around the small lute he had in one hand.

"Goodness, Finn, I thought you would never get here." A drawling voice suddenly rang through the forest and Finnabar nearly jumped a mile, catching himself on a nearby tree and half-ducking behind it as a scarlet figure, pale in the starlight dropped down from the tree where he seemed to have been waiting a long time.

"Well, I-I came as quickly as I c-could." Finnabar replied with a hint of nervousness that he tried to push away as he inched out from behind the tree to face the young man, who was now examining the gold stitching on his sleeve. "B-But I'm s-sorry to keep you w-waiting, Gabriel."

Gabriel gave a small wave of his gloved hand, as though brushing the matter aside. "Don't stutter, you know how it bothers me. How is Ptolemy?"

Finnabar swallowed, looking around for something to ease his nerves, that seemed irrational and panicked all the same. After all, he had known Gabriel for years ... "He's fine." he replied at long last. his fingers finding the strings of his lute and absent-mindedly plucking out a well-known tune. "Worried about you, though."

"About me?" the minstrel couldn't tell if it was anger, worry or surprise that was in the young man's voice, though his eyebrows raised ever so slightly. "Whyever would that be?"

"Well you know, you have been a little ..." his confidence had been growing as his music became a little louder, but he was abruptly cut off by the scarlet young man.

"A little what?" Gabriel shouted, without warning, his handsome face became contorted with rage and he leaned forwards, blue eyes blazing. Finnabar tried to focus on the strings and not on the normally calm acrobat. "What have a been lately? A little angrier? A little touchier? I little more crazy?" Finnabar's fingers hit a wrong note and the woods were silent again, with only the echos of Gabriel's anger mixed with the sour note of the lute fading into the night.

Finnabar looked up to see the scarlet dressed acrobat leaning back against the trunk of a large spruce tree, breathing heavily, his eyes closed. "Hush, Gabriel." he said, his nervousness was growing as in the back of his mind, he thought he heard a whisper. Felt a cold brush against his neck and he shivered, looking to the ever-watchful stairs. "You'll wake the spirits."

Gabriel gave a low chuckle, enough to make the minstrel's skin crawl. "Why should I fear the spirits of this place?" he said, taking a step towards Finnabar. His eyes had taken on a new kind of coldness that seemed to deepen the chill of the night. "There is nothing I need to fear..." he laughed again, and turned around, he seemed to be looking up at the silver stars as he spoke in a low voice, intense with icy fury. "You tell Ptolemy that I haven't forgotten him. But if he tries to interfere, it will be only the worse for him."

"Gabriel you don't know what--"

"What I'm saying? Oh, I do. And I mean it too..." he whirled around, reaching out and seizing Finnabar by the shoulders. The minstrel had to fight the urge to pull away as he was forced to look into the blue depths of what he was now almost certain was madness. "The world is my enemy now, Finn. Ptolemy, Oblivion, Jezebel, Calliope and even Foxfires are all my enemies. But you aren't, are you? You're my friend...."

"Of course." Finnabar replied, trying to keep his voice steady, and in the back of his mind feeling like he was about to cry.

"Good, now don't forget..." he released the minstrel, and Finnabar stumbled backwards, nearly landing in the snow. "Give Ptolemy my message." Gabriel started walking away, through the snow and deeper into the forest. "Don't forget." Was the last thing Finnabar heard him mutter before the darkness swallowed him whole and the minstrel was left alone in the shadows of the night, clutching his lute and feeling as though morning would never come.
"With all due respect, sir. I distrust your hat entirely."-- Jae Marquis




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That was a really interesting prologue, I can't wait to actually read the first chapter! The only thing I could pick out there was in the first few sentences. Did you mean 'stars' instead of 'stairs'? Anyway, as I said, it was really interesting, and good luck for the rest of your writing!
Most people see what is and never what can be. - Albert Einstein




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That was very interesting.

There were few grammar errors I noticed. PM me when you get the first chapter up If you do. I would love to read it!
When life hands you a BAD ROMANCE, pick up your TELEPHONE, call ALEJANDRO and JUST DANCE!




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Nice story. I can't wait for the next chapter!
"You may not be educated well in the areas of etiquette and the like as a princess, but you do throw some bashing good parties!"
Not all princesses are pink sparkles.
Exhibit A



Uh, Lisa, the whole reason we have elected officials is so we don't have to think all the time. Just like that rainforest scare a few years back: our officials saw there was a problem and they fixed it, didn't they?
— Homer Simpson