Rain Dance

Snuggled in the backseat by the left-hand window
Feet tucked under me and eyes half closed,
With the open half of my eyes
I watch the window.
The other occupants of the car talk monotonously,
Voices rising and falling, and the talk
Is synchronized with my slow calm breathing.
I don’t have to listen. My ears have closed.
The sound of the rain tap-tapping on the roof
Throbs on my eardrums, a steady, never-ceasing rhythm.

Droplets the size of a pea or a small glob of toothpaste
Land on the windows, quivering slightly
As they make contact with the glass.
Already present are smaller drops,
No larger than the dot on a lowercase letter i.
These pinpoint-sized drops don’t quiver.
They are almost part of the window,
Just something to over look, to gaze through
When gazing at the landscape flashing by.

After getting adjusted to their new perch on the car window,
The droplets immediately begin to run.
They race across the glass,
Leaving trails of water in their wake.
They almost have tails
Like some kind of watery tadpole.
Yet unlike tadpoles, the tails drop off,
Leaving the drops naked and quivering,
Again, only on a new spot on the window.

The drops race by other drops, ones of their own kind.
Cousins, brothers, friends, who knows?
They don’t seem to care about their family relations.
Completely unfeeling, they swallow up their brethren
As they race by, destroying every drop in their paths.
The result is a slightly bulging drop, much bigger than before,
For they have eaten their brothers, tails and all.
And rain continues to splash against the window.

Hello RSwriter3,

I really liked your Poem, it captured the beauty of rain. I do not usually do poems, so the only thing I can help you with is the Grammar.

Snuggled in the backseat by the left-hand window

This line needs a comma at the end.

Is synchronized with my slow calm breathing.

Maybe you should put a comma between the "slow" and the "calm."

I don’t have to listen. My ears have closed.
The sound of the rain tap-tapping on the roof
Throbs on my eardrums, a steady, never-ceasing rhythm.

I know what you mean by "my ears have closed," but perhaps you should rephrase that if you are going to say that you can hear the rain.

I like the way that you capitilize the first letter of every line. Like I said, I really don't know anything about poetry, but I like the way it looks.

Just something to over look, to gaze through
When gazing at the landscape flashing by.

Do you think you could use another word instead of "gaze" or instead of "gazing" to avoid repitition?

Yet unlike tadpoles, the tails drop off,
Leaving the drops naked and quivering,
Again, only on a new spot on the window.

I think that there should be a period after "quivering," instead of a comma.

That is all, except maybe you could change the ending to make it close the poem better. But that is just my personal preference.
aren't you glad that GOD made rain such an interesting subject? That was a Beautiful poem.

Very discriptive, I think you could make it more interesting and not as slow though.

Such a nice poem! I love the subject and the description of rain. It's one of my favorite things to listen to.
Some of the lines could flow more easily together, but overall I think its a beautiful poem