Saved from herself *Title needs to be changed*

Well this is something I've been trying to get down on paper for a while now so I don't really know what everyone will think of it. It's kind of rough at the moment so any thoughts and critiques are very welcoming. Tell me if you think I should carry on.

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There she was again. Gabriella Kelly had been coming to the coffee shop where Dave Cousier worked a lot recently. She always sat in the same chair, looking out at the rain running down the glass wall as she waited for her two friends Mylee and Cady to join her. They were the terrible trio and were always giggling or whispering together, but recently it'd all change. Gabriella always looked upset now and the girls were always trying to comfort her and when she was on her own she always looked lost in her thoughts as if something was eating away at her from her insides.

Dave always got caught up by how gorgeous she was, her amazing chocolate brown eyes where perfect even though at that moment so much sorrow was locked inside them. Her tanned skin looked out of place in their hometown country of Wales where it rained, pretty much all the time, her long brown hair hung way past her shoulders and it looked so smooth and soft. There was one word for her, one word with seven letters, she was perfect.

It's pretty good so far; however I should tell you that, sometimes, very, very short posts are just as daunting as very, very, very, long ones. There's not much to work with in those few short paragraphs; and it's a little difficult to get the feel of a story this short. Of course, taking into consideration six-sentence stories and flash fiction, that's not always true...
But you get what I'm saying, right? the end sentence

jessiica-x wrote:There was one word for her, one word with seven letters, she was perfect.

was pretty amazing. And yeah, the title does need to be changed :P
I would say, however, that even though we are seeing this more or less from Dave's point (3rd person limited) they're should be something going on; like
Dave watched her tears flow as he opened another bag of Argentinian coffee beans, scooping them absentmindedly into the espresso machine while his eyes drank in her pain-stricken face.
Or something. It's your story; do what you want with it.
By the way, you're from Wales?! That is beyond cool!

Thank you, yeah I'd been trying to get this idea down for a while and that part just basically seemed to write itself so I'll be adding to it soon
Yeah I've got a lot of more ideas to put into it and that bit you suggested was fantastic! Thanks so much
Yeahhh I'm a welsh girl thanks x

Erm, yes, the title does need some love. That can be looked at later, though, or even when you've finished. I'll concern myself with the little you've posted. Be warned, I have nitpicked, and even though it might look like I found a lot I didn't like, this is such a short extract that it's impossible to judge. I'll just point out a few sentences that you could tweak to make your opening as brilliant as possible.

Gabriella Kelly had been coming to the coffee shop where Dave Cousier worked a lot recently.

Oh, I love the opening sentence, by the way. I might even drop this sentence to a new paragraph to give that one line more emphasis.
Anyway, I'm not overly keen on your second sentence here. Do you really need to introduce your characters like this, as in, including their surnames? To be honest, it's not going to hurt me as a reader if I never even know their surnames, assuming that this isn't a crucial plot detail or anything like that. Maybe Dave refers to Gabriella as Gabriella Kelly, so that's not too bad, but to drop in his second name too - especially when this appears to be primarily told from his POV - is overkill. I'd cut it.
Also, I was a little confused. It sounds like Dave worked a lot at the coffee shop recently, rather than Gabriella coming to the coffee shop a lot recently. I'd maybe consider rearranging this.

but recently it'd all change

changed, with a "d".

her amazing chocolate brown eyes where perfect

"were".

Her tanned skin looked out of place in their home country of Wales where it rained no comma here pretty much all the timefull stop. Her long brown hair hung way past her shoulders and it looked so smooth and soft.

I've put in my corrections here. You should probably check your work a little more thoroughly before posting it here, because it makes you look more professional as a writer.
As for this description, I'm not too keen on it. It's a little bit bland, especially the "it looked so smooth and soft". Does Dave want to touch her hair, to run his hands through it and let it sneak through his fingers? Let us see this, rather than just tell us it looks "smooth and soft". Give your work a little more life and show, don't tell!

There was one word for her, one word with seven letters, she was perfect.

I find the mention of "seven letters" a little odd. Maybe include "lucky seven" or something, to make it seem more significant. This last sentence will have even more impact, though, if you cut the first use of "perfect", which was back somewhere in this paragraph.

Well, this is far too short for me to judge the whole story, but I think you need to liven up your style a bit. Give us a few more unique phrases. As I said at the beginning, most of what I've said here is nitpicking, but I hope I helped. Good luck with this, and PM me if you have any questions. Or, y'know, ask them on this thread. I don't mind.

Hiya! Starting off, I super duper like your story (I'm totally giving it a star or liking it or whatever it is) but there are a few things-

Her tanned skin looked out of place in their hometown country of Wales where it rained, pretty much all the time, her long brown hair hung way past her shoulders and it looked so smooth and soft. - I think that's a runon sentence Well, even if it is grammatically sound, longer sentences are harder to read.

I agree with Jetpack- you should separate the very first sentence into its own paragraph- it is is vary nice sentence and deserves more attention. (well, that sounds hoey... whatev.)

Hometown country? name a city in Wlaes ( I don;t know any, so I'll just do a ___) so it goes more like, hometown of _____, Wales.

Well, I like you story alot even if it very, very short. Godd luck on whatever else you write! Look! a pirate!