Love have hope for me

Love have hope for me

Love have hope for me,
Let this heart find peace,
Lost solace in thy spirit,
To this soul’s release.

Love have hope for me,
Despite the days of bitter frost
And sad nights of shadow,
Where all else seems lost.

Love think not of me as gone
When others stroke and kiss,
For our love surpasses all,
A passion all others miss.

Have hope for me, Love,
Even now as we’re apart,
Like wind to the willows,
These words echo my heart.

Love under open skies we settle,
In view of long ago,
Two souls united in a love
Only we will ever know.

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PaperMoon wrote:Love have hope for me,
Let this heart find peace,
In realms of thy love
To this soul’s release.

Remove one love. Please. The rhyming is going good so far. Thanks

PaperMoon wrote:Love have hope for me,
Through days of bitter frost
And sad nights of shadow,
Where all else seems lost.

This stanza is a little bit of a tongue twister. I almost choked.

PaperMoon wrote:Have hope for me Love,
Even now as we’re apart,
Like wind to the willows,
These words echo my heart.

Have hope for me, love (or Love). In this kind of case, you must put a comma before a subject you're talking to.


Nice, very well structured. Rhyme is also doing well, and I think the only floss of this poem is (maybe) the flow. The flow it's kind of sloppy, and because of that, it ruins the reading. I suggest you take a look at the syllables-count them and try to work it out somehow, make them be the same, or at least similar. That will surely help. Oh, and you're talking about love in general, but we actually don't know what's this all about-be more specific.

--WOO-HOO! (Homer...Simpson)

This is a pretty good poem. It seems like you know what you are talking about (if you don't then shhhh). However there were a few things I think I should point out.
The repetition of "love" in the first stanza should be corrected as previously stated.
I also agree that it doesn't flow all that well. It reads as if you just put rhyming phrases together without actually considering it at times.
I also didn't like how it went from "Love have hope for me" to "Have hope for me Love".

All in all a decent poem, you got your message across. Use this as a foundation poem and build from there and I believe it would be even better.

Okay, well, I'm not a poet, but I do enjoy to read it although I don't know all the basic mechanics. I have to say I liked this one very much, it's simple and I don't know about anyone else, but I love simplicity. Other than the things the people before me pointed out, I must say Great Job and definately keep on writing. <3 bElL3

Hi!
The poem is a nice one. It is simple and I really enjoyed reading it.

I agree with darko.demark666, especially about the second stanza.

Its good but you can definitely make a few improvements here and there as stated above.

Keep writing!

This poem is very deep, i like the use of similes and relation to nature. very descriptive, paints a picture.
yup idk what else to say im only 13 lol