Hey everybody. I decided to put this part (and just this part) in Jack and Callie’s perspectives.
Jack.
I pushed Hayley away. I didn’t want her at all. How could she even think I would want her after my heart had just been ripped out from my chest? It wasn’t like Callie to do something like that. She wouldn’t go that far with somebody she barely knew. Even if at this point she wanted to, I was determined not to let her. I would go up there and stop it.
I ran upstairs, afraid of what I might see. The door was locked. Damn. I knocked hard.
“Callie!” I said. Then, I heard her scream my name.
“Jack!” she said. She sounded truly terrified.
Without thinking for a second, I tried to thump the door until it opened. I kicked and punched until I succeeded.
“Get your damn hands off her!” I roared. The anger in me was unbearable. How could he be so sick as to do something like this to my girl? I thought. I ran over and knocked him off of her. I was way stronger and bigger than him, I took it as an advantage. I punched him in the face with force. I kicked him hard into the stomach while he yelped on the ground. His black eyes looked shocked, as he pulled up his jeans. He didn’t expect to get caught. What a creep.
“Jack! Jack stop! Come on can we please just get out of here?” she cried. Her dress was pulled down, she did it back up quickly. The sound of her voice was so much different than her usual perky self, obviously. Her expression was scared and upset. She had her arms wrapped around her beautiful body. I hated this guy for what he had done. He would pay.
I left him there on the ground with blood running down his face, holding onto his stomach. He choked.
“Come on,” I said to Callie. I had to get out of there. If I didn’t there was no way of knowing how badly I would hurt him. I just got in and out of there fast. Though I knew I had already damaged him, I wanted to do more.
She was so shocked. Her hazel eyes were wide and red from tears. Her lower lip quivered as she tried not to cry.
Jane rushed over to her immediately when she saw her.
“Callie! Are you OK? What did he do to you?” she said, not giving Callie the chance to talk.
“Nothing,” she whispered. She had the same expression on her face.
Jane looked at me, her green eyes filled with nothing but concern.
“I didn’t do anything. I’ll tell you another time OK? I have to get her home,” I told her. I wanted to just tell her right away, but I was sure Callie was in no form to hear it.
“Can’t I come with you guys?” she asked. All she wanted to do was help her friend. I admired her for it, but it would be best if she didn’t come.
“Sorry Jane,” I said in a kind voice. I was surprised it didn’t shake. “I don’t think it would be a very good idea. I’ll tell you about it tomorrow. You just stay here for a bit. You have your car don’t you?” I asked her, still using my polite form.
“Yeah I do, I guess that’s fine. Just make sure you tell me right away tomorrow OK?” she said. The concern in her expression was very noticeable.
“Yeah,” I said. I was surprised that Jane was the only one of the dancing, drunk teenagers that came over to see what was up. Although, she sure as hell was not drunk. The music was so loud.
I took Callie out of the house. We got in my car and sat for a while.
“Callie, are you OK?” I asked. This seemed like a stupid question. Of course she wasn’t OK. Why should she be?
She didn’t reply. All of a sudden, tears spilled down her soft pink cheeks. She held her face in her hands. I reached over and hugged her tightly.
“It’s alright. I promise I won’t let him away with it. It’s all over now,” I said softly.
Although this was technically true, I felt as if it was my fault. If I hadn’t been trying to make her jealous, Mathew wouldn’t have gotten jealous and took her up there. There was no denying it. It WAS my fault.
She just cried into my shoulders. It killed me seeing her that upset over him!
I took her home right away. I walked her up her avenue, trees swayed softly in the wind. Representing peace and tranquil that was not around. The house was surrounded by colorful flowers.
Her Dad was not home. I told her I would come pick her up tomorrow so that we could talk, if she wanted to.
She nodded and went inside her white house, silently. She still had the same traumatized look on her face. The awkwardness and tension that was between us earlier, seemed to be the last thing on the planet that mattered. I just wanted to help her, but I had no idea how.
Callie.
Maybe it was all just some nightmare, a nightmare with no Freddy Krueger, only worse. Maybe I could just get somebody to splash cold water on me and then I would wake up. But things are never really that simple . . . are they?
But yet, even though what had happened had shaken me, I was considering myself very lucky that somebody had saved me before it went way too far.
When I eventually woke in the morning, I saw my dad sitting at the table, like he did every morning. I decided I would not tell him. Maybe if I didn’t talk about it, it would all just fade away. I would run from my problems like a frightened little girl.
“Good morning Dad,” I said, struggling to compose my voice.
“Good morning sweetie, are you feeling alright?” he asked suspiciously.
“I’m fine. I just feel a little sick,” I lied. I did feel sick, but that was all I felt. Other than that, I was numb.
“OK then. I’m going to work. Maybe you should go for a walk to clear your head?” he suggested. The thought of going out shook me.
“No. I’m not going anywhere OK? I’m just going to stay here until I feel better,” I said, snapping just a little bit.
“Alright calm down. Call if you need anything. Are you sure you’re going to be OK here on your own?”
I nodded once. Then he left, and I was alone. I hated it. Anything can happen to you when you’re alone.
My whole body became freezing, I started to shake uncontrollably. I let my body fall to the cold tile ground. Was I having a panic attack? I sat there on the ground, shivering. The numbness of my body was horrible.
I remembered what Jack had said about calling over, it made me feel a bit better. He was the one who saved me. I wouldn’t have to fake around him. Just then he rang the doorbell.
“Hey,” he said kindly when I opened the door. He came in, guessing I didn’t want to go out.
“How are you feeling?” he asked, after giving me a hug.
“Not good, numb,” I said honestly. My voice . . . it didn’t sound like mine.
“That’s OK. Look, I know you might not want to talk much but it might help you,” he said. His brown eyes were trusting.
“Nothing can help me,” I replied with no emotion. I felt no emotion, nothing.
“Right, do you want me to leave?” he asked trying to help just a bit too much. I feared being alone.
“No!” I almost shouted. “Please, stay,” I said blankly, instantly in a different tone.
“Of course I will,” he said. He hugged me again and stroked my hair. I felt a little bit safe when I was with him.
“Thank you,” I said.
“Tell me something, how are you honestly feeling?” he asked.
“No matter how hard I try to close my eyes, to just think of something else for a fraction of a second, I can’t block it out. When I speak it’s like I’m not hearing my own voice,” I said. I was still blank, not one trace of emotion was in my voice or expression.
“It’ll be alright, I swear,” he promised me. But nothing meant anything to me right now. It had only been a day, but it had effected me deeply. “I’ll stay with you for as long as you like,” He said.
I hugged him tightly, letting one or two tears onto his brilliant white shirt. Even if we were not going out, yet, I still could use a friend who made me feel safe.
We sat down on my blue couch, and turned on the TV. He thought that it might take my mind off things. It even worked for a few minutes, but after a while I got bored. I needed air. But I would only go for a walk down the country road, which was at the left way of my house.
“Can we go for a walk?” I asked, realizing I had said no to it when I was talking to my dad, but knowing that I refused because I was afraid to go alone.
“Yeah sure,” he said getting up from the couch. I got my jacket and we left.
We walked silently for a while, enjoying the peacefulness of the cool air brushing against us.
“Not to be nosey but, uh, have you told anybody?” he asked.
“No, I don’t really want to either,” I said blankly.
“Jane still wants to know what’s up,” he said. He knew I wouldn’t want her to know.
“Don’t tell her, she’d just insist I tell my dad too,” I said. I felt cold. I felt bad not telling her. But, I wouldn't let some creep ruin my life, or make my friend worried. He may have shaken me but I would get over it. I was a fighter, my dad always told me.
“Why don’t you want your dad to know?” he asked. He really had no idea.
“He wouldn’t care. He would just leave me on my own and wouldn’t allow me to see anybody,” I said. I really didn't believe this, but it was the only thing I could come up with.. I was afraid he would make me see a councilor.
“OK,” he said. He looked down at his hands and started fidgeting.
There was silence.
“Hey look. . . I know you probably don’t want to hear this now but . . . about before, I’m sorry,” he said sincerely. I was in no place for fighting now.
“It doesn’t matter,” I mumbled. I meant it too. Nothing seemed to matter to me.
“You really do mean a lot to me, what I said to the guys that time. . . I was just being an idiot,” he said.
“It really doesn’t matter anymore. Thank you for helping me,” I said. For the first time in ages, and I don’t mean since last night, I allowed myself to feel pain. I allowed the tears to stream down my face without trying to hide.
Jack cuddled me into his chest, comforting me. This stupid, ridiculous argument we had been having meant nothing anymore. Then, I did something and I don’t really know why I did it. I was confused.
I leaned forward to kiss him, but he shrugged me off.
“Callie, I like you a lot, you know that don’t you? But you are really upset and I wouldn’t want either of us to think I was taking advantage of you,” he said. He was right too. I would rather it if I kissed him because I wanted to, not because I was upset. I probably wouldn’t have tried if I had been my normal self.
“Yeah, you’re right . . . sorry,” I said. I smiled a little bit.
I think this piece was more of an improvement from the others, you presented Callie's feelings well too 
Also, I'd maybe explain how his eyes looked shocked instead of saying they were shocked- like widened in shock or something like that.
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