He looks...

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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 6
I love the way that I can't look away
When you turn, your slender face gleams in the light
Your pale white skin glowing at the beach
Your rough hands twirling my hair
Then I look into your eyes and I realize
That your the one Ive always wanted

The him, the it, the mine....

Even as I sit here now
Talking to you face to face
You don't seem to get that I want you that way.
When I see you looking at her
Wondering why she won't take you
I understand that I will only be your best friend
Nothing more to you.

Your still my him, my it, and your mine...
Last edited by lulu_daisy_101 on Mon Jan 19, 2009 12:36 am, edited 1 time in total.




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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 23
Wow. I think that this is a really sweet poem, but you know what would make this poem a gazillion times better? If you added on. I can tell that the girl really loves the guy, but you don't get the extent of her feelings for him! I think that it would be ten times more powerful if you added on! :D
Please PM me if you do! I would really like to read more!
Yo, ho, haul together,
hoist the colors high.
Heave ho, thieves and beggars,
never shall we die."
- Pirates of the Caribbean 3, At Worlds End




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Gender Female
Points 790
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One word girl, Wow. I love your depth to it! It is wow. I love it! Your so expressive and neat! PM ME!




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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 47
Wao. Good. In the beginning it reminds me of twilight, with the skin gleaming in the sun and the pale white face. O_o
So yeah. That is all I really wanted to say, I guess . . . I like how it is sad in the end. Boo hoo. Nice work!
Post more stuff, man! Jees. :D hehe sorry.
Be crazy, be wild, be silly...
Because life is too short to be cool.



A person is more than their experiences, stacked up like stones... Our best moments are the foundations we use to reach for the sky.
— Yumi and the Nightmare Painter by Brandon Sanderson