You Created It All

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Hello Everyone,

I know I haven't posted a new piece in a while, so here's a poem I wrote last Sunday.
I hope you enjoy it.

Cheers!
-thevoiceinside



You Created It All

Looking at the world through doubled pane glass
I sit and wait for the time to pass
The sky seems endless like a melody
Some day, my child, you will see
Your words; a quenching sound
Like rain to dry ground

A song bird’s sweet lullaby
A newborn child’s innocent cry
The color of trees in an autumn scene
The mountains so lush and green
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, my King

Your gentle hands created it all
Nothing insignificant or too small
Heavens’ warming beams of light
Your truth fades away all fright

The velvet touch of a butterfly wing
The simple joy a smile can bring
An icy brook under a winters’ frost
The plea of a tiny lamb that’s lost
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, my King

Looking at the world through new eyes
I sit and watch as the time flys
This day, my Savior, I did see
Through everything Thou has created for me
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, and my King
Last edited by thevoiceinside on Tue Jun 21, 2011 6:42 pm, edited 2 times in total.
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."




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Hey! It's me. I am glad that you are back and you wrote another good poem. I really like it. The poem is peacfull and pretty but can you please tell me what The plea of a tiny lamb that’s lost meens?

Great job, awsome and coolio. I hope you will continue writeing!!!
Blood is red
But Heaven is blue
The Devil will fined out
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hey there!
i really liked this. this is a good poem. :D
i guess that's all i have to say...
Didn't find any grammar mistakes, neither i would change a thing.
:D
As you captivate my interest I'm going to read some more of your works :D
Piglet: How do you spell love?
Pooh: You don't spell it. You feel it.

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thevoiceinside wrote: Hey thevoiceinside

I like it. You get your point across and you do it in a charming way. It reminds me of a hymn that I can't remember the name of... but it's a good hymn, so all is cool.

There's some pnickitin' wots a'needin of doin', though...



You Created It All

Looking at the world through doubled pane glass 'double paned glass' is what it should be
I sit and wait for the time to pass
The sky seems endless like a melody Hmmm... A melody ends, though.
Some day, my child, you will see
Your words; a quenching sound
Like rain to dry ground I don't really understand this bit...

A song bird’s sweet lullaby
A newborn child’s innocent cry
The color of trees in an autumn scene
The mountains so lush and green
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, my King My favourite verse!

Your gentle hands created it all
Nothing insignificant or too small
Heavens’ warming beams of light
Your truth fades away all fright 'fades away' is a bit wierd. Some other way of saying it gets rid of fright. Outshines??

The velvet touch of a butterfly wing
The simple joy a smile can bring My favourite line....
An Icy brook under a winters’ frost
The plea of a tiny lamb that’s lost
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, my King Okay, so I lied, THIS is my favourite verse.

Looking at the world through my eyes Well, obviously you are looking at it through your eyes. You need a different line.
I sit and watch as the time flys *flies
This day, my Savior, I did see
Through everything Thou has created for me
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, and my King


Yeah. So, I like it. It's uplifting. You do just list all the things you like about the world, and some people are not going to like that, but I think that by listing everything that is amazing you've put across how you feel about it all.

Tis gurd, yarr.
I just hit my computer
Because it was being slow
I need my daily Smallville fix
And it will not load the video.




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Hey there!

This poem reminds me of a mix between How Great Thou Art and Heavenly Father Loves Me (aka Whenever I hear the song of a bird)

Raimunda pretty much echoed my thoughts. I love this verse the best, too:
The velvet touch of a butterfly wing
The simple joy a smile can bring
An Icy brook under a winters’ frost
The plea of a tiny lamb that’s lost
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, my King

I love how you allude to different things inside the poem, like the lost lamb. It's really a gorgeous poem! Thanks for the great read!

--Anna
"Man needs music, literature, and painting--all those oases of perfection that make up art--to compensate for the rudeness and materialism of life." -Fernando Botero




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Thank you to everyone that has posted a reply!! I really appreciate it :D

It seems like everyone loves this verse:

The velvet touch of a butterfly wing
The simple joy a smile can bring
An icy brook under a winters' frost
The plea of a tiny lamb that's lost
You are my Redeemer, my Savior, my King


Truth is, this was the hardest verse to put together, so I'm glad everyone enjoyed it :)
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."



cron
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.
— Martin Luther King Jr.