Music In Me - Chapter 2

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Here's chapter 2!
As you can see below, I'm changing the style of writing.
That is, I will be changing point of views between the main characters.
So everyone chapter will alternate between Claire & Julian.
Also, whatever happened in the past, like this '4 years ago' thing,
Is usually written in present tense, but otherwise, it'll be in past tense.
Hope it's okay!
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4 years ago…

Julian.
“DUDES! She totally said yes! I have a date with Jodie Adeline Houston!” Gabriel comes galloping down the hallway towards Felix and I, not caring when he bumps into students.

“Haha, relax bro! Running in the hallways will get you detention!” Felix laughs.

“Who cares?” Gabriel waves his hand airily. “I’m going out on Saturday with Jodie! Now all is right in the world.”

“Congrats, Gabe.” I mumble absentmindedly, focusing on my book.

“Gabriel has had a crush on Jodie Houston for a year already! We should totally celebrate, Jul!”

“Yeah, sure, whatever. Though I feel the need to tell you that the fact that you know Jodie’s full name, is totally freaky.”

The next thing I know, my book is being snatched out of my hands and ending up in Felix’s.

“Give that back, you dolt.” I hiss, annoyed.

“Who the heck is this ‘Bach’ dude?” Gabriel asks, peering over Felix’s shoulder and at my book.

“That dude, just so happens to be one of the most accomplished musicians of all time, with over five hundred compositions to his name. And for the record, the ‘ch’ in his surname is pronounced like a ‘k’. He’s German.”

“Haha, he sounds like a dog. Bark, bark.” Felix sniggers.

“Very funny.” I snap, irate.

“Back off, Felix. We shouldn’t mock those dead dudes we don’t know. Jul totally respects them.”

I cannot help but wonder why they are my best friends, at times like this. I snatch the book back and shove them into the classroom for fourth period Biology.

Though I may not be a genius, Biology is one of the subjects I do not really worry about. The hour flies by as I chose to ignore the teacher’s lecture and focus on an analysis of Handel’s composition, ‘Messiah’ instead.

Lunch is once again, uneventful. Felix flirts with the cheerleaders and Gabriel talks to the other guys about his date with Jodie, tactfully leaving me to read my book in peace. I take a bite out of my apple and suddenly, in pops Jodie, settling herself to Gabriel’s right.

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against Jodie. She is the one of the few cheerleaders who aren’t complete dunces and supercilious. However, I would rather not hear Gabriel and her going all lovey-dovey, distracting me.

Jodie’s friend, what’s her name? Oh right, the brown hair, blue-eyed Claire, sits down on my left, much to my discontent. I scowl at her briefly hoping she understands that I am warning her not to disturb me.

I hear my name inserted into the conversation. “The little boy next to you, is my other best friend, Julian Phillip Summers. He’s on the debate team.”

Idiot. Gabriel and Felix get a kick out of calling me little boy, because unlike them, I have yet to hit puberty. Not that I mind. But I look like a little boy next to them; short, thin and very boyish. I overhear my middle name being used.

I glower at Gabriel, who chuckles in response. “Stop saying my middle name, you twit.”

“Hello Julian.” Claire acknowledges me courteously.

“Hello person.” I reply and glimpse at her for the slightest of moments.

Forgive me for being so ungentlemanly, but I have no time for small talk. Learning the playing styles of the different composers will help me improve my performance. She becomes silent, but I am still aware of the conversation they are having.

I hear Claire stammer “Umm… well, I’m in the choir. I sing.”

I manage to hold back a snort and mutter to myself, “As if the choir does anything other than singing.” Thank you for pointing that out, Captain Obvious.

“Claire is being too modest.” Jodie pipes in. “She also plays some drums, guitar and is quite handy with the piano.”

For the first time, Jodie’s best friend captures my attention, “You play the piano …Claire?”

“Y-yes.” Perhaps I will finally find someone who is on the same intellectual level as me in piano. I find it hard to discuss my favourite topic with my friends when no one else in school seems to truly comprehend me.

“How good are you?”

“I’m learning grade five currently.”

Grade five? I am almost done with grade eight already. She will not be able to identify a modal piece of music yet. I can only discuss few limited things with her. In disappointment, I snort and murmur, “Amateur.”

Upon disposing our leftovers, Felix, Gabriel and I head for fifth period Algebra. We still have quite some time left before the lessons starts. Somewhere in the back of my head, my guilty conscience takes its revenge on me, for my inexcusable behaviour previously.

I force myself to close my book. “Hey Gabe, Felix, I want to apologise for my rude behaviour and everything this morning. Sorry.”

Gabriel pats my arm, “Don’t worry about it, little man.” I let the ‘little man’ insult slide. “We know how passionate you are with your piano and stuff.”

Felix punches my other shoulder lightly, “Yeah, it’s alright, bro. You’re usually like this before your competitions. We’re used to it. We’re used to your caustic personality after all these years.”

Abruptly, Gabriel’s eyes narrow at me, “Jul,” He questions in a low voice, “Did your dad make you stay up late to practice again?”

Damn. I was hoping that Gabriel would not notice the dark rings under my eyes, but he is known to have a sharp eye. If only they would just disappear.

“Kinda.”

“Julian…” Felix warns.

“I practiced for an extra hour because my staccato effect was not satisfactory and my dad came in and told me to play for another hour.”

“I swear, you and your dad are going to be the death of you!” Gabriel groans, slapping his forehead.

“You can’t die of excessive piano playing. Besides, if I want to win, I’ll have to perfect my staccato then work on my dynamics! Haven’t you heard that practice makes perfect?” I defend myself.

“You can die of exhaustion, Julian. We already promised us that you would tone down on your piano playing. You need to relax!”

“Don’t get all hysterical on me, Gabe! Piano IS relaxing.”

“No, it is not. You have to think when you play piano. Eventually, its going to seem like a chore and you’ll know that you’ve finally gone overboard.” Felix argues.

“Yes, but pardon me if I’d rather not be a fool and waste my time on something mindless. Furthermore, I highly doubt it will ever become a chore, so don’t get your hopes up.”

“I’m going to make you my pet project.” Gabriel declares. “I’m going to help you loosen up. Also, we’ve got to do something about your attitude.

“Good luck with that. And what’s wrong with my attitude?”

“Dude. You were totally not nice to Claire at lunch. In fact, you’re like that to everyone you don’t know well enough. So not cool, Jul.”

“Hey! That rhymes!”

“Shut up, Felix.”

“Whatever, Gabe.”

“At least try to be more sociable around strangers. You’re in the popular crowd for goodness sake!”

“Gabe, I don’t see how being sociable relates to being popular. Anyway, the only reason I’m popular right now, is because I’m rich and live in upper class Maybloom Boulevard. It wasn’t my choice to be rich or live there.”

“I WILL make you less uptight and more gregarious, Julian Phillip Summers. Just you wait and see.”

“Stop calling me by my full name and don’t bother wasting your time.”

“You know what you need, Julian?”

“I don’t need anything, Felix.”

“You need a girlfriend. True love and whatever mushy crap the girls love to talk about.”

“Haha, great joke Felix.” I roll my eyes, “But seriously, I don’t need anything.”

“I’m being perfectly serious, Jul.”

“Firstly, it would be more prudent of me to focus on getting into my dream college first. Secondly, I’m still young and my dad would totally kill me. Girlfriends are distracting and therefore a hindrance to my piano progress. Thirdly, I wouldn’t find my ‘true love’ in this school. Unless you can find someone who understands and loves the piano like I do.”

“You’re pushing yourself too hard, Jul.” Gabriel sighs.

“I’m not. I will know if I am. Just give up already, guys. I appreciate your concern, but there’s nothing to fuss over.” I answer him firmly. Felix opens his mouth to speak, but I silence him with my end-of-discussion glare.

I know they will continue to press the matter. I try to divert their attention by asking Gabriel about Jodie, switching the topic, but before I can speak, the shrill bell rings and I heave a sigh of relief. At least I’m spared for the moment.
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Wow. That was really good. I'm actually really fond of Julian's attitude and determination- I hope you don't take that out as it progresses! He's a great character and I might just become a fan-girl of his. Hah.

On a more important note you might want to elaborate on more detail instead of keeping just about everything in their speaking. They don't need to explain everything, you can do it for them, or a thought would be good as well.
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Sweet Meep:)! You have created another masterpiece. :D

“Very funny.” I snap, irate.

I had to look up that word. It really doesn't sound right there. Maybe irritated would be a better choice there. I'm not sure. That is my opinion. If you like it, keep it. Also there, change the period to a comma right after funny.



I cannot help but wonder why they are my best friends, at times like this.

I am pretty sure you don't need that comma between friends and at.

That is all I found. I might be totally wrong on this though. During English, I almost fall asleep everday. That's why I do all my writing during class so I won't fall asleep. Sorry if I am. :D
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Nope, i think you're right :)
I don't really pay attention in English class either.
:D
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Hi! :D I really like this, it's a great start. I'm not sure if I like Julian or not LOL his attitude pisses me off a little but i think I can understand him. About Claire I think i can understand her, but she too pisses me of a little not speaking her mind and take his bad manors in silence. I play the piano (still learning), and I think I know how I'd felt if a person who plays better then me (that's easy) would tell me that. I would totally beat him up. but again I'm not her. Anyway, I love it! Keep writing and please PM me when the next chapter is out!
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Pooh: You don't spell it. You feel it.

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Is it just me or is there always someone who is pissed off at a character in my stories? T.T
Anyway, haha, Julian's attitude might be explained further into the story.
As for Claire, maybe it's her personality? She could be soft spoken? :D
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LOL You're right! xD
Anyway, it's your story and you do as you like! :D
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Pooh: You don't spell it. You feel it.

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Erm, you should refer back to chapter 1, and read the latest comment I posted,
Because I am shelving this story. Reasons explained there.
Sorry :(
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Okay, so I have just read your first chapter of your other story and I have to say... I like the other one just a tad more than I like this one. But, I have only read the prologue for your other piece, so I suppose it's not really fair. To add, it seems there isn't much farther this can go besides the average cliche route of Julian falling for Claire or vice versa. I understand why you would start another story.

This piece was quite good, but it didn't over-rule my love for Blind's prologue. Julian seems to be an interesting character, and though I'll miss him, Nathaniel seems to have potential to take his place.

I think you need to add more development to your girls. The boys in your character outshine your girls by far, but that might just be me. They don't seem that intricate, so maybe you could add more secrets to their lives or something. Just spice it up! :D

These were the lines in your writing that I liked:

“Very funny.” I snap, irate.

This was perfectly placed with the perfect words. I admire your consistency with staying in the same tense. Present tense is something I have difficulty sticking with.

“Dude. You were totally not nice to Claire at lunch. In fact, you’re like that to everyone you don’t know well enough. So not cool, Jul.”

“Hey! That rhymes!”

“Shut up, Felix.”

These lines just seem so normal and it reminds me of me and my friends. There is always someone that's going to say something stupid. :)

Lines I didn't like:

“At least try to be more sociable around strangers. You’re in the popular crowd for goodness sake!”

This just sounds a bit awkward to me. Why, if they are in the popular crowd, would they say goodness sake?

That was the only line that really bothered me. Your characters in this piece are so prim and proper and it shows in your writing and how they speak. I like it how you add those extra words in, like causitc. Now it's my new favorite word! :)

I also enjoyed reading about Julian's dad, because it explains his personality. I was just wondering how it might have affected him if you continued this story... That would have been interesting.

Well, I'll be looking forward to Blind's next chapter!
:)
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Haha, thanks SeleneForeverDream.
You've analysed me very well :D
I'm shelving this because it is in essence, the hate-love kind of story,
But there's no excitement.
'Blind' has a plot sorted out already,
And there will definitely be more surprises and more character development (I hope)
More secrets, like you've said.
You read my mind!!! ...or have you been stalking me?! :)
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Act in the valley so that you need not fear those who stand on the hill.
— Danish proverb