My current favorite that I've written

3 posts
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Gender Male
Points 890
Reviews 28
Oscillating:

In the Booth, sweating away,
As kids raise balloons to the sky,
They choke the birds;
The first of the children to go.
I talk into the phone
As they rise higher,
And higher, and higher, and higher,
I hang up the phone
I've gotta get away.

On our knees, on the escalator,
We got our hands tied together.
We got our eyes closed.
The hymn of the motor sings.
I hear a ring from my pocket,
And my hands don't budge an inch.
The motor drags us up to the top,
And we'll be pulled into the machine and diced away.
Spliced, our limbs will then be pulled the bottom.
Falling fast, they'll swiftly start to be pulled higher.
And higher, and higher, and higher,
You hang up the phone.
I've gotta get away.

If a pharaoh whose soon to die
Would rather be buried in the streets,
Would the pyramid still be built to the sky?
Well, if it were me, I'd simply lay there
Then on the top floor, I'd crush the walls.
Crushing the walls to see the sky,
Crushing the walls to see the birds.
But soon enough they won't be flying.
And weary, I'll walk out the tomb.
I'll find those birds and rip there limbs,
The one's who don't deserve to be buried,
And throw them higher, and higher, and higher.
But for now, I'll get back to you,
I'll call you back.
I've gotta get away.
"Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of one's own mind" Ralph Waldo Emerson




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 2016
Reviews 81
i feel like this poem is supposed to mean something, but i don't really get it. it is very well written in terms of language; it is very poetic. but as i said, seeing as i dont really get it, i cant say much about it.

but dont be discouraged, becuase that could just me my problem. i often have trouble figuring out what poems mean, and it usually takes me forever, like reading it over a thousand and once, but i don't really have that kind of time now.

nice job though.
"Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody." ~ the catcher in the rye




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 1999
Reviews 106
I like this poem in vocabulary, but when it comes to meaning, im drawing a blank... Could you please explain in the end what it means? or add more meaning and detail in the poem.. Because i am totally confused.. But it is very well written.. cutos to you for that!!!!!!!!!!! Please pm me and explain the meaning.. I loved the way you wrote that!
I came into this world wrinkled and ugly. And no matter how much I accumulate here, it's a short journey. I will go out of this world wrinkled and ugly. So I enjoy life.



Deal with the faults of others as gently as with your own.
— Chinese proverb