I Will Follow You Into The Dark

Embroswyn15 · 2008-09-14T10:19:08Z

The woods were dark and forbidding, though the moon shone in little rays of pale light piercing the canopy of trees. The greenery still showed its color despite the lack of illumination needed to show its true beauty. The path wove into the forest and around the trees like a snake slithering around obstacles in its path. I know that most people would have been uneasy about being in a place like that in the middle of the night but I wasn’t “most people”. “Where are you taking me, Jake?” I asked as he pulled me deeper and deeper into the dark. Thank god I had built-in, natural night vision or else I’d be stumbling around like an idiot. “You’ll see,” he replied, looking back at me quickly with the impish grin that I had fallen in love with. I stopped in my tracks so quickly that he nearly fell back, stumbling instead and regaining his balance just in time for him to see me cross my arms in defiance, or just plain stubbornness as he called it. But I couldn’t frown at him for too long. It had always been hard to be mad at Jake. He was just so damn loveable. “Aww, come on,” he pleaded, batting his eyelashes playfully. “It’s supposed to be a surprise. You don’t want me to ruin it, do you?” I couldn’t help it. I smiled and gave in, shrugging my shoulders in defeat. “Why do you have to be such an—“. “Amazingly handsome and charming man?” he finished, cutting me off. “I was going to say an annoyance but whatever,” I said with a smirk. His grin never faltered as he pulled me close by the waist, his hand on the small of my back as he moved me, until I was close enough to smell the blood running through his veins, to hear our hearts beating as one, thumping heavily against our chests. Being as tall as he was, he had to tilt his head downwards to meet my gaze. I never got tired of his eyes, which made me even dizzier than I had been as he gazed lovingly into mine. I tilted my head back so I could meet it and we both smiled. “My annoyance,” I added. He rolled his eyes and replied, “Well, who else would I annoy if it wasn’t you?” We laughed simultaneously, his deep chuckle mixed with my high-pitched soprano. “I love you Jacob Black,” I murmured seriously, as I got lost in his dark eyes. “I love you too, Renesmee Cullen,” he replied softly. “ And I always will.” “Forever?” I asked in a muted, slightly raspy voice. He nodded his head. “Forever.” I had to stand on my toes to kiss him but it was worth the effort. And he was such a good kisser. I had loved him all my life and I never would stop as long as he loved me back. But I wasn’t worried about him finding someone else. I knew, for him, there would be no other woman and that I would always be his. That he would always want me. Forever. After our lips parted, he grinned again and grabbed my wrist, pulling me through the forest with such ease that only a werewolf and a vampire hybrid would pull off. We leapt in unison over logs and sped along too fast for the human eye to see anything other than a blur. I watched as the moonbeams hit our hair as we moved, shining on his black crop-cut and my lengthy bronze curls, and felt one with nature as well as my soul mate. We moved in the same steps, as if one of us were a mirror reflection of the other. I didn’t really pay too much attention to it anyways, wondering instead where Jake was taking me. “Just a bit further,” he said, pulling me closer to him. When he saw my grimace he added, “Don’t worry. It’ll be worth it when we get there. Trust me.” And I did, as always. If there was one person I trusted more than my own parents it was Jacob. Ever since he’d imprinted on me when I was born, I’d known I’d loved him. Before I could even speak, I felt a fierce devotion to him. He was what woke me up in the morning and what made me want to go to bed as late as possible at night. Each second I spent with him, I never wanted to end. In the end, I’d die for him just as easily as he would die for me. He was my everything. Suddenly, out of nowhere, we slowed and came to a halt. “Are we finally here?” I asked, hands on my hips. “Almost,” he said, looking at me in a way he’d never looked at me before. He continued looking at me like that for a good thirty or so seconds. “What?” I asked impatiently, tugging him out of whatever fog his mind had been enveloped in. He smiled and turned me around, hands on my waist, sliding up my abdomen until they reached my face. As he moved his hand up, I felt myself shiver, eyes closed to try to make the feeling last longer. Then I felt a cloth go over my eyes and I pushed it away. “What the hell, Jake?” I snapped, not used to being blindfolded. “Is this really necessary?” “If you want it to be a surprise…” he shot back and I knew he had a point. I sighed and submitted, allowing him to put the blindfold over my eyes. Then he twirled me back around and got in back of me so he could steer me in the right direction. His hands poised comfortably on my hips, he guided me along a pathway for a few minutes. Then, I heard something I didn’t expect to hear: the echo of rushing water. Finally, he removed my blindfold, stopped me and put his lips to my ear. “Open your eyes, beautiful,” he whispered as I felt his breath tingling on my earlobes. The sight I saw caught my attention so intensely that I gasped, putting one hand on my chest and the other over my mouth in astonishment. The waterfall wasn’t huge but it was still magnificent. It must have been roughly twenty or thirty feet high, cascading down in an endless veil of water at the front of a small alcove behind it. The water fell into a moderately sized pool that looked to be quite deep from the shades of blue in its center. But the water was crystal clear and there were pathways made around the pool leading to the space behind the waterfall. As I stood in pure awe, he saw how still I stood and, standing behind me, lovingly wrapped his big arms around my shoulders, my bronze curls cascading over them, and rested his head on top of mine as we both gazed out at the scene before us. “Incredible, isn’t it?” he began, grinning widely. “My mother took me here as a kid to go swimming, just me and her. She loved it here. We would go behind the waterfall, “—he pointed to the small alcove—“ and we’d jump into the pool, running through the wall of water and getting completely soaked.” I didn’t say anything as I tried to comprehend the significance of this place for him. How much it meant to him to be back there and how major it was that he chose to bring me there. This was a special thing, I realized, what was going on today. Suddenly, I felt cool water hit my legs and realized it was Jake near the pool’s edge, splashing water at me. I hadn’t even noticed he’d left my side. Shrinking back from the liquid by reflex, I saw he was smiling slyly at me. “Well are you just going to stand there or are we going to do some swimming?” he asked, taking off his shirt to reveal his smooth russet skin stretching taut over the muscles of his abdomen. I gulped and sighed in desire at the same time; tilting my head to the side as I admired him, remembering that all of that was mine and no one else’s. The smugness showed on my face and Jake saw it, smiling playfully. “Are you checking me out, Ness?” he questioned, looking back at me as my eyes shot from his body to his face, trying to hide the fact that I was indeed checking him out. God, I felt embarrassed. A strong blush entered my cheeks as I smiled at him, sauntering over to him, pulling my shirt off at the same time. “Now why would you think that?’ I asked, taking off the rest of my clothes until I was wearing nothing but my bra and panties. It was so worth it as I saw the look on Jake’s face. Then, I winked quickly at him, and dove into the water. Without surfacing, I swam underneath the waterfall and into the small alcove behind it, not realizing until I did surface that Jake had beat me there. I found myself emerge right next to him, my body against his. While still in the water, he pulled me closer by the waist until I was right up against him and kissed me hungrily. I didn’t object, putting passion into the kiss myself. It wasn’t until we had to take a breath that our mouths parted. “Well, that was nice,” I murmured. “Nice?” he asked, putting on a shocked look. “That’s all I get for that mind-blowing kiss? Nice?” I shrugged nonchalantly. “You’ve done better,” I said plainly. He looked stunned, his jaw dropped in surprise. I smiled at him and swam closer again. When I got nearer, I laughed. “I was only kidding,” I assured him. He smiled back, looking at me as if he’d never seen me before…as if he was taking in my face for the first time. “I know,” was all he said as he stroked my cheek with the back of his hand, his dark skin contrasting on my fair complexion. I looked at him in confusion, turning my head slightly as I furrowed my brow. “What is it, Jacob?” I asked silently, touching his face to covey my question. He didn’t shrink back. Without saying a word, he jumped up onto the stone floor of the alcove and just stood there, looking back at me, obviously waiting for me to follow. I leapt up and straightened my back, standing to face him, soaking wet and half-naked. Dad would have killed me if he’d known I’d let Jake see me like this before being married. He was, after all, kind of old fashioned. Still, Jake said nothing. “You’re sort of freaking me out right now,” I said as I watched his face, turning from awestruck to slightly nervous. “What’s going on?” He didn’t say a word as he walked to the edge of the water, dipped his hand into it, and pulled something out. It was wrapped in a plastic bag so he removed it to reveal what it held. A small, circular box covered in dark blue velvet sat poised in his hands. A ring box. I gasped, putting my hand on my chest to brace myself. Everything clicked. Why Jake had brought me to such an amazing place with so many fond memories for him, a place so special. Why it had seemed like he’d planned everything out. Why he had been looking at me to strangely. Why he was holding a ring box. He was proposing. I gulped as he gazed down at me, opening the box to expose the simple but stunning antique diamond ring inside. I looked quickly from the ring to his face to the ring and back again. Taking the ring out and breathing in deeply, he began to speak. “I have loved you since I first saw you. You have been the only thing that has given my life purpose and you are, now and forever more, the only woman I will ever love. I can’t live without you and I don’t plan on it.” I was speechless. “Will you, Renesmee Carlie Cullen, have my hand in marriage?” he asked softly, slipping the ring onto my finger to find that it fit perfectly. I think that was when the first tear fell from my soft brown eyes. But I was smiling and, without even having to consider it, I knew my answer. “Yes, Jake,” I managed as I kissed him, letting the words come out each time I took a breath. “Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!” I kissed him like I’d never kissed him before and he picked me up by the waist, lifting me into the air and twirling me around before he set me down on my feet. His kiss was deep, the rustic, sweet scent of him intoxicating as our lips were entwined. Suddenly, I pulled away as a thought came into my head. “Jake, you know how old-fashioned my Dad is,” I began shakily. “You did ask his permission to marry me, right?” Silence. This was going to be one hell of a week. The beginning of the rest of my life with Jacob. My seventh birthday. And my father, murdering my fiancé when he finds out about our unapproved engagement. Great. I was going to be a widow before I even got married.

AllyyyAlwayyys

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Mon Oct 06, 2008 8:01 pm

AllyyyAlwayyys says... · Mon Oct 06, 2008 8:01 pm

Wow
this was great
though as a lot of people before me have stated,
E.(I don't know how to spell her name sorry) isn't much like how breaking dawn set her up to be.
As for this sentance:

Embroswyn15 wrote:After our lips parted, he grinned again and grabbed my wrist, pulling me through the forest with such ease that only a werewolf and a vampire hybrid would pull off.

a hybrid is a offspring of genetically differant parents
and isn't E. half vampire and half human?
and jake as for him isn't just a werewolf?
just wondering if you ment it to be like that
or not
but overall I think that this is one of the better twilight fanfics that I have read
XD

"The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting. Could it be that we have been this way before"
-Fall for You by Secondhand Serenade

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DarkAngle11

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Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:38 pm

DarkAngle11 says... · Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:38 pm

I loved it. Thats all I can really say. At first I had no clue it was about Twilight but then it kinda fit but besides that, I LOVED IT!!

TWILIGHT MOVIE 11*21*08
~Molly and Jake~

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dianis97

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Wed Oct 15, 2008 1:12 am

dianis97 says... · Wed Oct 15, 2008 1:12 am

it was really good!!
I really liked it!
it kind of reminded me a little bit about Edward and Bella, the relationship between them, but, you did have a few mistakes, they are all corrected tough.
Well, there are just a few things, as I told you before, they reminded me of B/E, I think you forgot to think as a vampire, remember the mind powers and everything, it was more like a human relationship.
But, overall, it was a good job!
I really liked it!..continue practicing!

"It's a wonder I haven't abandoned all my ideals, they seem absurd and impractical. Yet I cling to them because I still believe, despite everything, that people are truly good at heart" Anne Frank.

Diana!

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niccy_v

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Wed Nov 05, 2008 6:43 am

niccy_v says... · Wed Nov 05, 2008 6:43 am

I loved it ... the next parts are amazing too!

Okay one thing - the bra and undies thing felt so pedophilia to me - but that's only because i find it hard to imagine jacob seeing his once-true-love's daughter almost naked. Kind of creepy.

Otherwise i love it, the writing is pretty amazing, very good description. You've captured Stephenie Meyer's writing fairly well i think.

Definitely continue!!!!! Or i might feel inclined to kill you XD
... hehhehhehehehe

Writing gives my life purpose

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Mars

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Fri Nov 14, 2008 5:18 am

Mars says... · Fri Nov 14, 2008 5:18 am

i don't think i can find much to say that hasn't already been said, except that it actually seems kind of in the stephanie meyer-style (author of twilight). i don't know if you did that on purpose--if you did, that was a cool touch for a fanfic, and if not, you are just a great writer.

(and i love jacob.)

'life tastes sweeter when it's wrapped in poetry'
-the wombats

critiques // nano

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SeleneForeverDream

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Sat Nov 15, 2008 1:58 am

SeleneForeverDream says... · Sat Nov 15, 2008 1:58 am

There were actually very few mistakes. Also, the flow was really nice, though occasionally interrupted, I felt like when I was reading the excerpt of Midnight Sun and I was grinning so broadly that I was near tears. This is very Stephanie-Meyerish and I will be so happy if you add more to this. It will be as if Stephanie Meyer decided to finish and publish Midnight Sun (I wish!).

Got YWS?

You judge others upon their actions, but you judge yourself by your intention.

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Spiffygirl

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Fri Nov 21, 2008 7:45 am

Spiffygirl says... · Fri Nov 21, 2008 7:45 am

Quite wonderful! I was suspicious at first that it would be out of character, but the characters do correspond to the book quite well. Nessie's is the one you can't be sure of, but Jake's falls right into the happy-go-lucky boy. And it's so him to not get permission like he should have.

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LOLLIPOPGIRL030

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Sun Nov 23, 2008 5:40 pm

LOLLIPOPGIRL030 says... · Sun Nov 23, 2008 5:40 pm

I agree with KJ about the whole mind-pictures thing. And I really can't see Renesme saying yes, yes, yes....., but I really liked it. You really had me picturing everything; the waterfall and alcove. The ending was fantastic, so keep up the good writing! I look forward to reading more.