*wink wink*
But I won't tell you who...It'll ruin the surprise.
Happy Reading
**Edited as of Sept. 21**
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CHAPTER THIRTEEN
I find myself struggling in school, my mind too consumed with the Coven to concentrate on what I need to be doing. Carmen watches me closely, staying close to my side throughout the day as well as Michael. They are both wary, afraid that Rebecca might do something rash. I don’t think she would dare attack us in the middle of the school day but Carmen insists that we be prepared for anything.
Philip has yet to show any ounce of fear, participating in the events of the Coven as if nothing is wrong. I can sense Carmen’s anxiety on the matter, washing over me in waves of emotion. I fight against it, already too overwhelmed with my own worries to let his become mine. He sees this but seems unaffected by it.
I enter Baking on Wednesday, feeling drained. Isaac sees my loss of energy but has yet to comment. He is still the same optimistic person and I let some of his joyfulness seep into me, lifting my mood. He greets me with a smile that lights up the room and a cock of his head in sudden seriousness. I smile weakly back, not able to resist the temptation and he still doesn’t ask about my odd behavior. It seems as though he is respectful of my privacy and lets that distance remain un-breached
Which disappoints me.
I want to be able to confide in him. I want to share my thoughts and feelings with him because I know that he will understand; I know he will be there for me. And yet I know I can’t. He would never look at me the same way again if I ever told him about my Coven, about my way of life, about…me.
I give myself a mental shake, jerking myself back to the present. I catch Isaac watching me closely, his eyes ever vigilant yet soft and compassionate. I wish I could enter his soul and my mind ponders over the idea that maybe he is resistant to us…that maybe my kind does not have the same effect as it does on other humans. I can’t help but test my theory, knowing the threat that if I go too far I will expose us. But I believe in my control and so begin.
Catching Isaac’s eyes, I hold him. I notice that his body freezes like a deer caught in the full glare of some vehicle’s headlights. I can just picture my eyes transforming into an earthy green—gentle, angelic, harmless. His eyes soften, the guard weakening and I realize that he is just as vulnerable as the rest of the humans.
I make myself stop then, breaking the trance I had put him in. Isaac seems temporarily stunned and shakes his head, his brown hair falling into his eyes. Then he peeks up at me, confusion clouding his Nordic-blue eyes. “What just—“ he cuts off, shaking his head again. I breathe deeply, ignoring him as though nothing is wrong. “Sophia?” He speaks my name, and I look to him. He opens his mouth to speak, looking like he is reading to tell me something important, but Carmen appears, his lean form coming into view.
“Sophia,” he greets with a tight-lipped smile. I can only guess that he had been watching my little show. “Isaac.” Isaac just nods his head, still befuddled. Carmen moves closer to me. “Ooo, those little pies sure look tasty.” His eyes are glowing as his lips land near my ear. “Mind if I have one?”
“No, not at all,” I say stiffly.
He reaches for one at the same time hissing in my ear, “Don’t you ever pull a stunt like that again!” I nod, as if were talking about the weather. Carmen flashes me another warning smile before leaving, taking the pie with him. I spot Michael watching from the other side of the room. I glare at him, but he just shakes his head as if I have disappointed them both. I did nothing wrong, I defend silently, Just a little test, that’s all. No harm done. I glance at Isaac who is dutifully finishing off the last pie. He licks his fingers clean of the cherry-flavored filling and smiles at me, a true, genuine one, and I know that he is no longer confused from the trance I had over him only a few seconds before.
See! No harm done.
* * * *
After school, I leave the building, emerging into the fresh spring air. The trees are budding with new life and I hear the harmonious symphony of the local birds as they chatter to each other from neighboring trees. I hug my one textbook from math closer to my chest and descend into the parking lot. I soon spot Carmen’s red Honda Civic. It’s coat of paint shimmers in the sunlight and I soon spot the owner leaning nonchalantly against the hood. His head is cocked to the side and he grins thinly when he sees me. “Sophia, done playing games?”
I snarl. “I wasn’t playing games. I was…curious,” I state, hurrying to the passenger side and jumping in. Carmen hops into the driver’s side turning the key in the ignition. He zooms from the lot, cutting off many students who honk in anger; I frown at him. “Curiosity never hurt anyone.”
“Yes, but you sure as hell are shooting that fact down.”
“I can’t believe you are freaking out over this.”
“Well, believe it because I am,” Carmen snaps frostily, his eyes deadly.
“Don’t get crabby with me,” I warn, “You know that your anger can get away with you.”
Carmen sighs but his muscles loosen. “You know that my anger is reasonable.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Well you should! This isn’t some game, Sophia. Our Coven is in danger, our way of life hanging by a thread and yet you find it amusing to play with some human’s mind in the middle of class!” His words hit me with the force of a bullet and I cringe openly.
I feel my own anger rise now. “I know all this! And I wasn’t ‘amusing myself’. I was just—“
“Curious?”
“You don’t understand,” I mumble, crossing my arms forcibly over my chest and glaring out the window.
“You know, Sophia, I never understand you! And I don’t think I ever will because you never give me the time of day! I see the way you are with Isaac…and I know now that I have been replaced.” The air leaves my lungs in a whoosh. Carmen’s immaculate face, worthy of the gods, is pinched in raw pain. It is so visible, so unbearably clear, that I clutch at my gut. I know that his feelings are washing over me, becoming my own and I push him out. I see the shock on his face and then it smoothes back into that painful expression before hardening into anger. “I’m right, aren’t I?”
I swallow hard, struggling to comprehend all that has conspired in only a short amount of time. I had never thought of replacing Carmen, of seeking another. Carmen has always been my friend, my listener, my shoulder-to-cry-on. I couldn’t picture my life without him. But lately he is true in his assumption that I haven’t really spoken with him. I mean, really spoke with him. I have been so caught up in all that is happening that I forgot all about my friends, my brothers and sisters of the Coven and now as I look at him, his usually golden eyes a-light with fire, I fear that I have lost him. For real this time. Before it had been my own stupid selfishness because he was being Bonded with Nora. Now…it might be something more.
Something that might not be fixable.
I breathe deeply. “Carmen,” I whisper, “I could never replace you.”
“So you say,” he huffs, turning his eyes back to the road as we pull onto the gravel driveway.
“Why would I lie about something like this?” I wonder with forced calm. “Carmen, you are my friend! I would never, ever replace you.” He slams on the brakes, almost throwing me into the dash. His eyes pierce mine. “Sophia, I believe you, no matter how insane that is at the moment.” He pauses for breath. “But I can no longer deny the…lust you have for Isaac.”
“Lust?” I practically screech; I can just picture my face, wide with shock and embarrassment.
“Yes, lust. I don’t mean in the physical aspect…but in the mental, you do. You need what I used to give you.” Carmen’s face dissolves into that painful look again and I feel his emotions seeping into my being again. “And I can’t give you that anymore. Nora is…is…” He stops, his eyes swimming with some unknown emotion that I can’t recognize. “She’s my Blood Mate. I can’t keep baby sitting you. Nora and I will be Bonded in a month and I can’t keep—“ he cuts off again, clearly at a lost for what to say.
But we are saved when Nora appears, her beautiful face crowding the driver’s side window. I see Carmen’s face split into a smile, and I sigh. The love emitting from that one twitch of his lips is enough to prove to me that he isn’t lonely and now I think that maybe he’s wrong. It isn’t me deserting him.
He has replaced me.
I was a little bit confused about the part with Isaac in a trance, but I got it afterwords... just a little slow today ha ha. You wrote Sophia's emotions so well, and I could feel her sadness.
