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Twilight - A Reality.

Sela Locke · 2008-08-22T06:32:24Z

I'm not looking for nitpicks, but opinions on the 'big picture'. Have fun reading! ^^ ---- I had managed to get through the enormity of the day without incident, thankfully. Now, as I walked to biology, a sense of foreboding hung in the air-- Brushing it away, I stepped inside the small classroom, hoping not to make of fool of myself in front of all the other students. Everything seemed to be going fine until I saw who my partner was, and my heart only just managed to keep beating. Edward Cullen! Eyes flitting away from his perfect form, I shifted them to the seat I would be occupying, struggling to breathe normally. Don't do anything stupid, Bella , I thought desperately. At least if I do, it won't make too much of a difference. No one like him would notice me, anyway. "Alright, class is starting, everyone! Quiet, please," The teacher requested - I hadn't caught his name, too absorbed with not letting my eyes wander anyplace in my partner's direction. "Now, to begin, the--" "Excuse me, sir," A wonderful voice to my right breathed, full of respect and flawless precision. The middle-aged man glanced up, looking just slightly put out by the interruption. "Yes, Mr. Cullen?" "I'd like to speak with my partner outside -- it won't take more than a moment." If Edward had said it any other way, I was sure our teacher would have denied him this favor, but as it was... "Yes, of course. Make sure to keep close-by - I'd rather not have students of mine wandering the campus," he warned, seeming to slur his words compared to the boy I sat next to. "Thank you, sir - we'll be right back." What can he want with me ? I wondered, sifting the fantasies away as I stood, and wobbling slightly before turning to follow Edward out of the room. People stared as we passed, especially the girls. They, I saw with something dangerously close to satisfaction, looked on enviously. He opened the door, holding it for me with a quiet smile - mockingly? It was hard to tell. "Thanks," I mumbled lamely, sure the other students was laughing silently from behind. "Sure." Hoping he would just say whatever it was and be done, so that I could scurry back inside, I leaned against a faded white wall just outside. Edward sighed, looking me straight in the eye as our classroom door thumped shut. Something seemed - wrong about this, but I wasn't confident that I'd be able to figure it out. Suddenly, those frighteningly dark brown eyes lit up, and he offered a hand to me. "I have something to show you - it's in the woods by your house, actually. Come on, it's very interesting." For some reason, instead of being stunned, I quickly weighed the possibilities. Could he be serious? Mentally, I shook my head at the idea. Whatever this was about, I had to refuse. What would Charlie say about me ditching on my first day of school? "But... I can't just leave. We could get detention!" I loved saying 'we' instead of 'I', as if the two of us were part of the same club. It was a pathetic connection, but for now, I didn't mind. "Don't worry. I can drive - it's not like you're that far away from school. I'll think up a good excuse - is it likely you could break or sprain something out here in the hall?" He sounded amused, as if the idea wasn't a likely one. I knew different. "Easy," I said, smiling abruptly. Desperate for this one chance to be with him, I forced myself to forget Charlie; and everything else. "Then, come on!" I took his hand, not caring much that it was cold and hard - muscles and a cold day could cause that, right? I assured myself it was nothing out of the ordinary. "Just around this building -- no, no one's around, see? I told you we wouldn't get caught." We were in the parking lot faster than I thought possible, standing beside a sleek silver Volvo. I knew very little about cars, but somehow I knew this one couldn't have been cheap. "Don't worry, she's fast. We'll be there and back like lightning!" He laughed, voice almost supernaturally beautiful. What had I done so right? As he swung the door open for me, I decided it must just be a prank. Then I'll enjoy it while it lasts , I thought determinedly. As we pulled away from the curb, I started to tell him a little about Charlie and my first impressions of the school. Somehow, it seemed impossible to be shy in front of the flawless boy. "I hope you like it here in Forks, Isabella. It really is a nice place, once you get used to the cold and fog." He winked and smiled crookedly, and somehow I knew he could hear my heart speeding up again. But just as I started to wonder what this could really be about, he parked the car at the fringes of a startlingly green forest, practically jumping out with excitement. "Here, it's just a little bit into the trees here. I know you'll love it, Bella." I had quickly told him he could call me that, and my stomach lurched as his perfect voice caressed the name. For some reason, I hardly remembered getting out of the car, or the walk through the woods. It could've taken minutes or days, but the moment his hand grabbed mine, nothing else mattered. All worries seemed to flee as I felt his cold skin brushing my fingers. "Almost there.. ah, here it is. Isn't this place beautiful?" It was a green meadow, full of flowers and fresh dew. Even on this dark, cloudy day, the place was breathtaking. At any other time, as I shuffled into it through the fringe of trees, I probably would've made a complete fool of myself by tripping and falling - but with Edward leading me, that didn't seem possible. "Here, sit down and listen..." Awe filled my face as I did his bidding without question, closing my eyes as he settled beside me. What I heard was, if you could put it simply, Nature herself. I easily forgot myself in the breeze, the birdsong, the swaying of the trees. The excitement I had so recently felt was replaced by peace, scents of calming quiet. I could hear mice scuttling through the underbrush, wing playfully ruffling the grass. It would've been easy to stay all day, to just mix silently with unquestioned happiness... Something cold brushed my lips, and I soon realized how different Edward's plans were going to be. No - way. This really must be a dream. Eyes snapping open, my arms flew instinctively around his neck, clutching tufts of bronze hair with desperation. I knew I would wake up soon, but why worry? It was all so perfect... Too perfect. As his lips found their way down to my neck, I began to stutter random things, hoping to catch his attention. All of a sudden, everything about this supposed adventure seemed off, somehow. "... As if that wasn't enough, she took away my favorite CD! Debussy, if I still remember right." Of all things to be distracted by, this did it. He looked up, surprised, his intense eyes interested in the ending of this completely random story that had popped into my mind from a few years ago. Relief flooded through me, and I shrugged. "Really? You like classical music, too? If only I could've taken you to my house first; I could've played a piece of his for you," he said, only slightly regretful of the way things had turned out. Before I could reply, he kissed me again. I tried not to respond at all, but it was impossibly hard. I wanted to; so badly. And yet - I didn't like the way he'd said that, as if now, he wouldn't ever get a chance. Not the best of implications. His mouth was back at my throat, and I was just about to protest his behavior when-- "Thank you for coming so quietly, Bella. Really, thank you for coming to Forks. Since I know I never would've gone to Phoenix, and so never would have met you otherwise. It's almost sad, how a kind act could lead to such a selfish one... if I wasn't what I am, I might feel pity for Charlie, for you, for Renee." Why? Sorry for what? He hasn't done anything, and he won't... will he? "Edward," I whispered, as his lips slowly made it to what I knew was the main vein of my neck. Could this be happening? "Edward!" "What, Bells?" If it was distracting to have that coldness on my neck, his voice certainly didn't help clear my mind. "Well, now that we've seen the meadow," -- and even now, being included in that 'we' seemed pleasurable -- "shouldn't we be getting back? Not that I haven't enjoyed this... adventure, but--" "You're afraid I'll do something stupid, is that it?" I could only nod, hoping not to offend the flawless man before me. Loosening the grip he had on my waist, Edward looked directly into my eyes, only this time - something burned in his own. Something too close to lust, to passion. "Oh, you mustn't worry, Bella. When you've lived as long as I have - and, unfortunately, you never will - you learn to think things through. I've got my whole alibi figured out thoroughly." I had messed up, and this time there was no second chance. Maybe it didn't matter why he wanted to end my life - no, it really didn't. And finally I realized that this was a blunder I wasn't going to recover from. He gently tugged one of my hands from its place around his neck, causing them both to fall loose. Carefully picking it up from the grass, he took a deep breath of my skin. "I can't resist this wine, child. I am no human, but a predator. Does the lion think of what family the lamb might have before he devours her?" I could not answer, only tremble uncontrollably. The look on his face was so soft, and infinitely kind - but it was only a mask. His mouth lowered back to my neck, and I took one last breath as he answered for me, as his fangs sank deep into my throat. "No, child."

Should there be more?

Yes! Bella should become a vamp.: 26; 68%

Eh, no thanks. Good work, though!: 12; 32%

: Total votes : 38

Celticmusicgirl

Gender

Points 4449

Reviews 82

Wed Oct 13, 2010 2:11 am

Celticmusicgirl says... · Wed Oct 13, 2010 2:11 am

lemme start off by saying good job on this it really makes you think "wow what if edward hadn't been brought up as a vegetarian vampire?" it was pretty cool. i love the whole series and this is an interesting piece go ahead and write more. Just remember it is best to have fun when you are writing something like this. If you enjoyed writing this then readers will most likely enjoy reading it.

"No life is forever. We found and fought here. We loved and died here... The crops whither and the bones of hunger walk the sunken roads... The land has failed us... In dance and song we gift and mourn our children. They carry us over the ocean in dance and song.
-American Wake by Riverdance

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Sandvich

Gender

Points 600

Reviews 32

Wed Oct 13, 2010 4:44 pm

Sandvich says... · Wed Oct 13, 2010 4:44 pm

Magicweaver14 wrote:That was some crap!!! I hated it im going to put my story on here and put urs to shame!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahhahahhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhaaaaahahahahaha!!!!!

Im not mean i just love writing!!!

Unsuccessful troll is unsuccessful.

Anyway, it took me a while to bring myself to click on this, but when I did... what a pleasant surprise. I liked the way Edward acted like a proper vampire, although to make this more realistic, he should have died the instant he stepped into the sun.

(Jokes)

As you can see, I'm not one for long reviews.

The Fear Contest - Winners

1st Place - Hit the Black by mikeypro
2nd Place - Makeshift Calamity by jcipriano1
3rd Place - Ashes and Blood by HaydenSmith

"And so I arrive, like a sudden windstorm at a kindergarten picnic!" - Dimentio

Quote

The same boiling water that softens the potato hardens the egg. It's about what you're made of, not the circumstances.
— Unknown

Twilight - A Reality.

Should there be more?

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