Hey G,
I don't have time to critique this whole thing right now, but I'll give you some pointers. First, you definitely have some potential for writing. This piece was very good, especially for a first time. Like the others said, you did rush it just a little, but you did a great job detailing, and you had a strong opening. I noticed some errors in tense, but keep writing, and I'm sure people will keep reading.
Agreeing with repeatedly-repeated comments on pace, I nevertheless liked it a lot. In certain parts of the story the suspense could be improved, but the overall image left me wanting to read more.
To slow down the scene in which the plane is flying, you could perhaps create a scene, perhaps involving the man sitting next to Georgina, to establish him as selfish, so as to provide motivation for him pushing past her. Or maybe that's just impatient human nature, so whatever .
Welcome! This is really good. I love the story line. I think that you could probably have put a bit more suspense in it. The part where the plane crashes is a little to fast compared to other parts where it sometimes tends to go too slowly. I think it needs more feelings as well
Overall, I think this is a really good story. It just needs more descriptions and suspense.
Good job! Keep writing!
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