I finally figured out a title for this so next time I post it will be as All Babies Are Blessings… At Least That’s What They Tell Me I'll probably just put it as All Babies Are Blessings just to make it shorter
Also Kyle's name has been changed to Peter.... I hope you enjoy!
Back To Reality
I screamed, and my eyes flashed opened again, the bulge in my stomach kicking. The white walls, white floors and white ceiling comforted me. I was where I had been for three months, Veneta, Oregon. I had just woken up from the nightmare that had haunted me since that day.
I was born and raised in Veneta, so I knew where this group home was, the group home for pregnant teenagers. My friends and I always snickered when we passed this place, who would be stupid enough to have sex without protection? Then I came here, pushed by my parents who kicked me out, and realized there were only a few whose pregnancy was actually under their control.
It definitely wasn't my decision to come to Veneta's Young Mothers Shelter, a group home for young girls between the ages of twelve to nineteen who were pregnant. I originally tried to get an abortion. Before this, I was pro-choice. I thought any woman should have that choice whether or not to have a child, especially if it wasn't in their control. But it was different when it was happening to me.
I remember waking up a month later, expecting to see my little friend making its mark in my underwear, but it wasn't. I tried to stay calm while flashbacks of that night played through my mind. Had he gotten me pregnant? No. He couldn't. But what if he had?
I was too young to be a mother, I was only seventeen. How was I going to tell my parents? They didn't know Carl did any of those things, and if I told them he had gotten me pregnant they wouldn't believe me. They would just think it was one of the guys at school and my father would track some random guy down and make him cry while asking questions. No, I definitely couldn't tell them.
I was pacing back and forth in my rather large bathroom, not knowing what to do. First things first, I decided, I have to go to school. I rushed to get dressed and drive my new Lamborghini my parents bought me for my sixteenth birthday.
I could hardly concentrate on my four classes before lunch. I couldn't think; I was so worried. When lunch finally came, I was so nervous I couldn't eat.
"What would you guys do if I said I think I'm pregnant?" I blurted out once my closest friends had sat down. Their mouths dropped simultaneously, if I wasn't so worried I probably would've laughed.
"Are you serious?" my friend, Allison, asked with a mouthful of macaroni and cheese. I looked down at the table and nodded. "What? Who did you do it with? When was this?" she asked.
"Let's just say it was the night of Mike O'Connell's party," I quietly murmured, ignoring the question of who it was.
"Are you sure?"
"I think so, I haven't taken a test or anything but I'm ninety percent sure."
"Okay, I'll go with you tonight to the drug store and we'll buy a pregnancy test and then if you are we'll figure out what to do," Allison said. Her eyes were still wide open in shock, she was probably as surprised as I was, but for a different reason. She and I told each other everything; she may have thought I was keeping something from her, like if I had a boyfriend. I wish this had happened from my boyfriend, it would have been so much better than my cousin. Only, I didn't have a boyfriend.
Well, there were rumors that Peter and I were going out, but that just comes with the territory of being head cheerleader and captain of the football team. We were going to be paired up regardless. But I didn’t mind. Peter and I had actually gotten really close, and if things had turned out differently I probably would have gone to the actual prom with him.
After school, Allison rode with me in my car to the local drug-store to pick up a pregnancy test. We couldn't wait to get home for the results, so she came into the small bathroom with me in the drug-store. There was barely enough room for one person, never mind two. We were cramped in the little linoleum floored, cracked ceilinged room.
The directions were simple, pee on the stick then wait ten minutes. If there was a minus sign, be happy, he didn't get you pregnant, if there's a plus sign, well, good luck. I was pacing around the tiny bathroom, biting my nails, while Allison was fixing her make-up in the mirror; she thought the guy who sold me the test was cute.
"Can you be any more conceded?" I asked.
"What are you talking about?" she replied through stretched out lips, she was putting on more blood red lipstick.
"I'm waiting for the results of a test that could end my life and you're just putting more makeup on because you think the cashier is cute!"
"Okay," she snapped, closing the tube of lipstick, "sorry, I'll just be psychotically worried like you are."
"Of course I'm psychotically nervous, Allison, can you imagine what my parents will do?"
"True," she said. We both thought of my parents' reaction and shuddered. "How long has it been?"
"Just about ten minutes," I murmured, looking at my watch. Five seconds to go. Four. Three. Two. One.
I walked back to the sink where my test was laying and picked it up with trembling hands. There was a little plus sign. I dropped the stick and fell to the floor and started crying. Allison looked at the test too and came to comfort me.
We stayed in that bathroom for an hour, before we had a conversation of substance. She was sitting in the sink while I was on the floor, leaning against the wall. We both cried. She kept asking me to tell her who the father was but I refused. She got angry, but stayed with me.
"We still have options," she said. "If it's only the first month you can get an abortion, or you can keep it but you have to tell the father." I shivered. Telling the father would be worse than anything else. "There's a clinic downtown, you know, Planned Parenthood? And you can be out in an hour or two. I can pick you up after the surgery."
"I guess that's my only option," I said quietly. It sounded so easy. The simplest option, really. It will be gone, and I wouldn't need to worry about this. Nobody would have to know, it would just be a little speed bump on the road to life. The perfect plan.
It was all different when I went to Planned Parenthood. I didn't expect to see people lined up in front of the building with posters with slogans and pictures of unborn fetuses. All the protesters came up to me and asked me questions like "How could you kill a defenseless baby?" Initially, I tried ignoring the sights and sounds during that five minute walk from my car to the clinic but then I heard what someone called me.
"Murderer!"
I quickly spun around, and stared at the faces of the protesters. The last word rung in my mind. I brushed away the tears that, I hadn't noticed, had formed in my eyes and slid down my cheeks. I went deaf for a minute and saw the silent faces of the people yelling and waving their fists in the air. All I could hear was my heart beat. I remember thinking it was going too fast, and then I noticed it wasn't only my heartbeat, there were two hearts beating.
I'm not sure if the baby inside of me even had a heartbeat yet, but I was convinced I could hear it. My eyes grew wide and my sense of hearing returned. I quickly turned and ran to my cars. All the protesters started cheering.
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I'm not all that sure on the title though.. haha
~Dommy
. You've got me so into it!
