When Truth Comes

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When Truth comes
like a black and white checkerboard,
like the painful slice of reality that
grows with every birthday;

When Truth comes
like a slap in the face
with the realization of life's true shape,
once hidden behind the shroud of innocence;

I want to hide beneath the blanket again
and pretend that if I can't see it,
the truth can't see me.

Truth is a potato:
stubbornly ugly, waiting for someone
to change its form.
Many people aren't satisfied with a simple, lumpy root.
To them Truth is something to mash.
Something to dice, slice, and bake
until it finally meets their needs;
so they can hand it to you and say,
"Here is the truth."
"Man needs music, literature, and painting--all those oases of perfection that make up art--to compensate for the rudeness and materialism of life." -Fernando Botero




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Hi! I'm a big Mary Oliver fan myself, and I guess I can say I'm a pretty big fam of you now too because I really liked your poem here. Let's introduce ourselves: I'm Aussie, and I guess you're Anna, so glad to meetcha, Anna!

On to business. It seems to me like the last stanza, which for convenience's sake we shall call the potato stanza, was too long. i like the whole idea of it a lot, but . . . ooh! Maybe try putting that first, like a thesis question, and then put the other stanzas after it. Or maybe break it up and put potato references (that's weird to say) in the other stanzas, so it's like a running theme.

Also, the blanket stanza kind was kind of crunchy to me. It needs to be smoother. That 'again' really got stuck in my ears. I dunno. Don't let me get you down, this is really top-notch stuff here. i love it. PM me if you have any questions.

See you around!
“To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.” - Freya Stark




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Oh wow. That is beautiful. It has such truth to it. I love it. The last stanza was awesome. Your imagery is BEAUTIFUL.

I love it. I really can't find anything wrong. (Oh, and thanks for your review on my poem. I loved reading it. You're awesome. :))
"I move the stars for no one."
-Jareth

"You say this Labyrinth's a peice of cake? Well let's see how you deal with this little slice."
-Jareth




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Hey Anna,

Truth is a potato:
stubbornly ugly, waiting for someone
to change its form.
Many people aren't satisfied with a simple, lumpy root.
To them Truth is something to mash.
Something to dice, slice, and bake
until it finally meets their needs;
so they can hand it to you and say,
"Here is the truth."


I absolutely loved this!! It was amazing and stunningly creative. The whole potato idea made perfect sense. It was great! Thanks for the awesome read :)

-kimberli
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."



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