Summer Moments

6 posts
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Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 19
Summer is a series
of moments
close to
the heart.

Summer is a sequence
of warm delicate breezes.
Summer is the pitcher,
filled with cool ice tea.

Summer is the warm wind,
sweeping everything along in it's wake
Summer is the tide,
as it meets land
when the sun sets;
oblivious to the happy faces.

Summer is justice
for all afraid
of the cold, forlorn
nights of winter
and it's ways.

What is summer
some might ask
summer is a rose in bloom,
beautiful and sweet

Summer is a lake
full of
memories
cool and clear

Summer is a sailboat
floating past
a lighthouse
atop a shore of rocks.

Summer is a flower
fading into autumn
all who see her go
wait for the season once more.




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Gender Female
Points 1650
Reviews 287
Summer is a sequence
of warm delicate breezes.
Summer is the pitcher,
filled with cool ice tea.

Summer is the warm wind,
sweeping everything along in it's wake
Summer is the tide,
as it meets land


All the other parts only uses the word summer once. In these two parts you use it more than once. It just bugs me. Doesn't really go with the form of this. Using the word 'summer' once per part. You don't really have to change it.


Other than that well done. I liked it. ^_^
check out my deviantart account ^_^
http://maki121.deviantart.com/




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 3263
Reviews 158
I thought this poem was beautiful.
I really visualized summer in my mind.
You got just the right touch of softness in this poem that I felt was needed.

I felt warm reading it.
None of your ryhmes felt forced and it was all very music-like and rythmical.

If you always write like this, you are headed for some great things! :D:D




User avatar
Gender Male
Points 890
Reviews 35
I liked it! You missed a few punctuation marks, but those are easy to fix.
Admiration: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Confidence: the feeling a person has before he fully understands the situation.

Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 890
Reviews 270
Really good. I wrote a poem about summer also. It's a sonnet. Anyway enough about me, I liked it. I love summer!!!!!! Great job and keep it up! :D
Don't send sheep to kill a wolf.




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Gender None specified
Points 890
Reviews 27
ah the summer, poems about summer are very common thou
this one seamed different somehow.
Keep writing, maybe on a different season next time.
I enjoyed it.



Find wonder in the everyday, find everyday language to articulate it.
— Maurice Manning