City By Day

Busy people rushing round,
Dragging screaming children.
"Try this! Oh you'll look so sweet in this"
Pink frilly dress, look like a flamingo! What a miss!
The drunken tramps on the side,
I just want to run and hide.
The hustle and bustle of the town,
Taxi drivers sit with a frown.
Oh no! My favorite shop is gone!
Phew! Good not for long.

I'm sorry... this will sound really rude... so I apologize in advance. I didn't really get it. But that may just be me.I'm not saying it isn't bad or anything, i just don't understand it. I liked the rhyme scheme, though. i'm soo sooo soooo sorry if i sounded rude, I truly am. Since I don't understand it, I cant really give a good critique. so, again, i'm sorry.

dont  worry bout it about a city or a shooping mallin the day

Hmmm...I gather you don't live in a city? Because, truly no offense intended- this isn't a good portrayal of one. On the other hand, I liked the flow, and it certainly described your point of view well! Not much to say here except for- I liked it, although it was very busy. Don't worry if you don't like cities, though. If you don't live in one, there's way too much input to your brain. That's probably the best part of this- it describes accuratly that feeling of not knowing where to look, what to think, where to go!

What do you have against cites? No offence I didn't really like it. I'm sorry, but this was filled with stereotypes that say the city is a endless death hole full of danger and dissapointment. Actually, many cites are not like that. NYC is increacingly getting safer.This poem just bothers me. But, hey it your opinion. I really prefer the city because the country is the middle of nowhere and suburbs creep me out. One more thing the lines made the poem look too crowded. Overall, I didn't like it. I'm sorry.