Tabula Rasa: Part II

The second part of my psychological crime drama.

THOMPSON: (Addressing the audience) You know, you’ve had it easy. All your lives you’ve had it easy. Going to a proper school. Getting a proper job. But me, my whole life’s been a shithole. A bloody shithole. And those bitches, well they got what they deserved, doing what they did. They had it coming. They knew that the minute they started living, me, Roger, would come after them. They deserved to die. They deserved to die the way they did, the bastards.

[AS MASON ENTERS…]

MASON: Bastards?

THOMPSON: Nothing.

MASON: Oh, it was probably something. We know about you, Thompson. We know what you’ve done to those girls. Look…

[HE PRODUCES A PILE OF PHOTOS.]

MASON: Cynthia Darrow… Amy Sutton… Martha Lewis… Katy Stewart… Lisa Ingram… Bethany Holloway… These are the right order, aren’t they?

THOMPSON: What order?

MASON: The order you killed them.

THOMPSON: I never killed them.

MASON: Come on, don’t play games with me! You see their faces, here? Their beautiful, glowing faces? So pretty, so naïve, so… innocent. You must remember them, surely –

THOMPSON: I swear, I haven’t seen any of them.

[BEAT.]

MASON: It’s pretty brutal in prison, you know. Tell us now and we’ll make sure your cell’s two whole square feet bigger than the others.

THOMPSON: (Laughs) How can I trust you? You’re a liar.

MASON: Tell me, when have I lied?

THOMPSON: When you lied to the police, remember? About your brother –

MASON: Do not bring my brother into this.

THOMPSON: …How he was doing drugs, alcohol, the works…

MASON: Do not bring my brother into this…

THOMPSON: …How he embarrassed your family, being such a fuck-up…

MASON: DO NOT BRING MY BROTHER INTO THIS.

[SILENCE.]

MASON: I’ll tell you about my brother. As long as you tell me about yours.

THOMPSON: What? I never had a brother.

MASON: Yes you did. Remember Samuel? The one they said was “wrong in the head”? It must have hurt you when they came to take him away, seeing him all chained up, screaming like a distressed animal, the poor thing… All that repressed anger… you had to find a way out for it, didn’t you?

THOMPSON: Sammy? My brother… he was good to me… I would never hurt him… Sammy! (To MASON) Tell me, where is he?

[THE DOOR OPENS. BRADSHAW ENTERS.]

MASON: I have to go. (Exits)

I like this but not quite as much as the first one. I felt that the opening monologue by Thompson was a bit too dramatic and angry and cliche, maybe you could have made his feelings a bit more subtle and show them slowly throughout the script. But overall I'm looking forward to the next one.

I like this idea it could be a really good one to. But I think it could be longer and more action or more describing. I think you can add more signifigant details in their to give it a good spark to it. My play is to long to put on here but you know what I mean.

If you have any questions feel free to PM me at anytime.

TTYL SimonCowellLuver