Their mum and dad called out encouraging words from below.
“Lives not fair!...
Alexzander heard nothing as he bowed several times and smiled, arrogantly rolling his eyes, down at the peasants who wouldn’t dare try this.
Though they still watched others agog, as they performed what seemed impossible to them; during these times it was understandable that they begged to be entertained, though on no account was this worth the extra salary he got to keep moral alive during times of war.
Imported all the way from the other continent, spoils of war from a war not won.
You can smoke it you can drink it; of course both times a large amounts is crushed.
Looking through sea of faces, the many stands packed to brim, it wasn’t uncommon for something to fall and be trampled.
Then there were people who couldn’t be bothered moving when the show began pissing themselves or soiling or both.
The stands were cleaned weekly but by the time it was time to clean them. They literally overpowered anyone stupid enough to walk past them. When you cleaned them once you never wanted to do it again. It was decided by a bag of stones and one had the fateful words inscribed on it saying ‘Bench and Stands Duty’ Sighing in irritation he cursed wandering of his mind and forced himself to forget it all, distraction were least what he need.
Alexzander smiled to him self because even when she wasn’t in her costume she still looked liked an acrobatic angel. Many of the men and adolescent boys had tried vainly to flirt and gain his sister love, but she politely refused. After she’d told him that she just wasn’t ready. She looked slightly nervous her feet shifting about. But she was ready as she looked at him again. Her face was resolute.
It wasn’t she didn’t love Antio, she knew he hated being forced to do this.
We are family; we shall stay a family and always be a family!
Her heart fluttered, the fire the passion, it reminded her of the early day.
She nodded in agreement her eyes full of intense hatred but her eyes strangely hot and wet, “Jared Lyons, just be glad we can’t find work else where.
You can’t have Sierra or Alexzander. Grow up; you call yourself a man, the girl only nineteen! She’s not yours to have.
She groaned, why did she stop him?
He damn deserved it, and she wanted to break his neck - to stop his taunts for good
“Now, now, now, Antio you should try to control your temper especially as you wouldn’t last very long in a fight. --Oh did you forget the little problem of walking? Too bad! Now get out my sight, before I send your whole family on to the streets! Don’t think I won’t, you do after all know me, or so you claim, so never think I need you. I don’t need you!”
He’d no right, her family risked life and limb for him and he didn’t need it. They headed back to their trailers.
Many of the men and adolescent boys had tried vainly to flirt and gain his sister love, but she politely refused, gradually the refusal become more cold.
“What do you mean by what? Do you mean this night as I watched or when I preformed it?” Antio eyes fell over his leg, the night coming back so vividly.What do you mean by what? rephrase that. And Antio eyes Antio's eyes
Alexzander success…”Alexzander's success..."
He had short fluffy bread reaching to his neck.short fluffy......bread? Fix the spelling error
“Now you two, not now, it’s been tiring day and Alexzander clear that expression she cares about you god, be glad she does.”it's been a tiring day
Looking down at the floor Melissa muttered, “Lives not fair! Now when you feel mature enough to apologize. We’ll be here.”Same as what Sydney said, I could be reading this wrong, but do you mean
Sierra lip quivered slightly and her eyes welled up with stinging tears.
Make the changes I listed above and also the changes the others listed. I suggest you re-post it after everything it done, so the other mistakes can be found. ^_^
...distraction were least what he needed.
Gradually the refusal become more cold.
He felt, no fear as he fell; plummeted
The look of nervousness she had given earlier vanished
The enclosure hummed with noise, limelight’s shone forth from neon lamps and various perfumes and other bodily smell emanated off the people.
agog
But now it was time for her the finale.
Her golden locks flying.
the crowd were silent
The look of nervousness she had originally vanished,
Sierra sighed to herself still blowing kisses.
Seeing all those normal girls watch with such envy if only they knew…
Then headed down the long descent.
The ladder, shuddering;
over his- calculating green eyes
"Weren’t you worried? Sierra
him self
The spectators broke out in a frenzy of applause.
Looking through sea of faces, the many stands packed to the brim
The enclosure erupted with noise, [no comma] while the stands reverberated with old fatigue. A shroud of [s]limelight’s[/s] limelight glistened (each one glinting with a inviting glare) from neon lamps, emitting chromatic shades, [no comma] while many perfumes and other bodily smells rose off the people in a colourful cocktail.
Gradually, the din hushed and the [s]Orchestra[/s] orchestra stopped, some collapsing.
[s]As the[/s] The crowd’s eyes stirred from each other and towards the heart of the marquee, [no comma] to witness a middle-aged man saunter out, dressed in red, an inky black hat balancing on his head, the rim shielding his right eye. A long vivid light [s]following[/s] followed his movement all the way to the hub.
Once, [no comma] all was quiet, he spoke.
“Ladies and gentlemen! The act you’ve been waiting for all night,” the man’s voice boomed, “the most popular part of the night featuring son and daughter of the world celebrated acrobat couple Antio and Melissa.” He took a long dramatic breath, [period instead] “The brother and sister duo Alexzander and Sierra!” Again pausing his face lit up in glee, [period instead] “… [no ellipses] Tonight for the first time ever, they will perform their parents’ signature feat ‘Blind Luck’!”
Waiting until it quieted down, he continued, “Tonight we’ll see if Alexzander and Sierra will succeed where their parents failed?”
“Or will they fall short, ending their successful career in a night?” While he spoke, he took a sideward glance at Antio, smirking, while he juggled the enthusiasm of the rabble.
Letting out sounds of reverence consisting of oooohs’ and aaaaahs’, their hungry eyes filled with wonder.
Though they still gazed at them and countless others, agog in his statuette marvel, [s]while [/s]Sierra and he performed what seemed impossible to most.
During these times, it was understandable that they expected to be entertained, though on no account was this worth the extra salary he got to keep morale alive, [no comma] throughout [these] times of tension.
Alexzander knew that they all loved him; [period instead] it made him feel amazing, exhilarated, a god among men; always giving them what they asked for and rarely failing
His family was known all through the continent of Loka’saw, [dash instead?] him especially.
Positioned on a tall trunk-like structure, sporting bright, garish colours, Alexzander felt no joy from these bright and psychedelic shades, appealing only to those intoxicated on Shoth. Another lovely thing gained from this struggle. Imported all the way from the other continent, spoils of battles from an un-won war. They could be smoked, drunk or ingested.
The stench overpowered anyone insane enough to walk past them. It was hardly ever cleaned: [s]cleaning[/s] Cleaning duty was assigned by bad luck, [no comma] and not very often. Each person drew a single pebble out of a bag of stones, one of which had the fateful words "Bench and Stands Duty" inscribed on its surface.
[New paragraph?]
Sighing in exasperation, he cursed for letting himself drift into persiflage. Forcing his mind to focus, he reminded himself, [no comma] distractions [s]is[/s] are how amateur mistakes are made.
It was the most daring thing he had ever done. He felt at this point nothing could stop him, that he was invulnerable, and no way would he make the same mistake his father had.
His sister, Sierra, stood on a smaller pillar, grinning intently at him. She was a few years older than him, had long flaxen shining hair, which she always kept loose; for she had expressed to him many times that she loved the feeling of it flying as she fell.
Thick, [no comma] eyelashes made her azure eyes stand out on her countenance.
Alexzander smiled to himself; yes, it was no surprise men wanted her- if only for her appearance. It would be best if they knew without the make-up, she was about as heavenly as a harlot. Many the man and adolescent boy -blinded by her feats and make-up- had tried vainly to flirt and gain his sister’s love, but she would politely [s]refused[/s] refuse. Gradually the refusal had become colder. He could see her shifting feet and hands tightly clasped. Slowly her face lifted, and though she appeared nervous, her eyes were totally resolute.
It's also bet to put spaces around the dashes. So it would read like this: ...it was no surprise men wanted her -- if only for her appearance.From far below, he could barely see their parents, screaming out words of encouragement as his Dad genuflected clumsily, [no comma] in an act of excitement and pure joy.
Her job was to catch him at the last minute. The problem was if there was no safety net below and… well, she wouldn’t let that bother her.
They were finally considered skilled and old enough to try this. He felt no fear sailing down-- [comma instead] plummeting; the wind rushed through his whole body, then he was aware of his sister grasping his hands. As he gripped hers in return, he felt a warmth and clamminess, showing she was nervous. Ignoring this, he smiled widely and madly. She threw him on to her former platform.
Sierra climbed on the trapeze, and then, while it still moved, she leapt, facing away from the destination column on to the higher one, her beautiful long blond hair flying free.
Twinkles, glittering from her elbows, made both arms appear to be pure light, completing the lie that she was a Goddess.
Landing, she sighed [s]quickly[/s] in relief, the heart pounding, [no comma] her chest as if it were a cannon ball.
Leaping, she caught with her legs and looped them round the stool; then she raised two fingers to her lips and let a shrill and piercing sound free, throwing [s]himself[/s] Alexzander off backwards as soon as the sound was uttered. [s]she[/s] She [s]speedily[/s] quickly [if you must have an adverb here] caught him, still gripping the stool with her legs, and with astonishing strength, she flung Alexzander into the air. Coming down, he landed on the swing. Having not one second to relax, she whistled again, [semi or period] he leapt blindly back over to his pillar.
There was no mistaking the sound of the peasants. As he leapt easily over, they cried out in shock; [comma instead?] and no mistaking the fawning of girls impressed by mere feats, [no comma] easily accomplished.
Sierra swung a few more times on the trapeze [s]her elegant movements[/s] as she balanced with one foot hooked on, [no comma] then flipping to perform the splits [s]of[/s] in mid-air.
[s]Each strands of [/s]her hair [s]splaying[/s] splayed out in all directions [s]-creating a mane-[/s]. [no period] Before it fell.
], and combine this with the previous paragraph.The [s]worse[/s] worst was over; finally she preformed a forward roll in mid-air, her [s]dextrous[/s] dexterous fingers catching hold of the bar and clambering up.
Not wasting one second, she got up on to her hands and head. [comma instead] [s]The[/s] her legs pointing towards the roof of the canvas.
Blood rushed to her skull, but keeping her eyes on the people, she ignored dizziness and nausea.
Vaulting once more to the trapeze, [s]he[/s] she landed on her bare feet, the trapeze still swinging like a pendulum of a very gargantuan clock. [comma instead] The crowd a visible blur of colour [s]and noise[/s].
Lastly, she swung trapeze more. Alexzander opened his eyes, the bright fluorescents lights dazzling him briefly as he strained to see, and leapt gracefully back to his own pillar, [no comma] while Sierra moved back to hers.
The noise was colossal as they bowed and embraced the overall admiration; flowers were thrown into the centre. They would brag to their friends and family, blowing it so hugely out of proportion that even world’s greatest trickster would be impressed.
Turning around, Alexzander saw Sierra on his pillar, smiling and blowing kisses to all her admirers. The look of nervousness she had worn originally [s]now,[/s] was nowhere to be found, [semi or period instead] there had been no reason for her to be so anxious anyway, [no comma] as she now [s]even[/s] looked alive beaming.
No one, [no comma] who’d watched would understand how it felt, how much of a rush you got. [comma instead] The sensation it gave.
Searching the stands, he looked for anyone worth giving an autograph to. [comma instead] Someone he would get more than a little, ‘that was great’. He winked at his sister, grinning, and bowed.
It was horrible knowing Jared stared at her, the skin-tight leotard leaving not much to the imagination. And even now, his leering stares, [no comma] [s]creating[/s] created a clammy tense feeling between the shallow façade of tight revealing outfit.
Alexzander took one last standing ovation, extravagantly bowing and enjoying the reaction he got. [comma instead] Then headed down the long descent. In this world, love was bought and sold, or you were born into it.
The ladder, [no comma] [s]shuddering[/s] shuddered as he climbed down; it wouldn’t [s]of[/s] have mattered if it shook and threatened to break. Nothing could kill the mood, the belief of invulnerability.
Sierra blew a few more kisses, cradling the love in each kiss: [comma instead] genuine devotion apparent. Once done, she followed [s]him[/s] Alexzander down.
Before his foot even touched [s]scraped over[/s] the hard dirt, his mum swept him up in a constricting embrace, her strength still showing after all those years.
“Well done! Oh, well done! You were so amazing up there, your Father and I --” Her voice faded and she stopped the embrace, Alexzander could hear no more under the tumultuous crowd. Bright moss-coloured eyes nearly rolled [s]almost inside[/s] to the back of his head. Slouching against the pillar, he waved his hand at the crowd passively, [no comma] before placing [s]them[/s] it on one of the pillars. The signs of a [s]moustache[/s] mustache were visible under his nose.
Uninterested in the crowd, he let his long fingers dance over the wood, [no comma] and carry on to chip the already stripped pillar. He let the admiration wash over him, stimulating him, glancing up to see his [s]Dad[/s] dad limping ardently towards them, weeping tears of joy.
“Well done, [exclamation point instead] both you and Sierra performed the act perfectly!” their Father stated heartily, [period instead] “You amazed me tonight, both of you!"
Sierra came up from behind, smiling, and walked over to Alexzander, pulling him away from their [s]parent’s[/s] parents.
Once she felt it was far enough, she started, clearly still high from before, [period instead] "I admit, Alexzander, I was scared and worried." Sierra spoke, flustered but also excited[period here] "Weren’t you worried?” Sierra asked as she looked into his sharp eyes. “Even though it felt amazing, I was still worried,"
“Sierra, we are [s]worshipped[/s] worshiped like gods; why should we fear? We were born to last.” He stood shocked; [comma instead] his hands animated, reflecting his stubbornness.
“Even if we were lucky tonight, [s]doesn’t mean[/s] we won't [s]will[/s] be lucky forever. Sometimes I worry that it will run out.” Edging uneasily closer, her eyes stared into him with such sincerity.
“Never fear! People, like ourselves don’t burn out like fireworks; we are shooting stars.” Pointing towards the sky, he traced an invisible path while he spoke.
“It’s not me I’m worried about, it’s you! Just be careful,” Sierra continued, [period instead] “I’d rather you were a little cautious, [no comma] than be shot into the dust because you attempted to reach too high.” She stared with more intensity and, through the apparent love, was loathing of what he was saying.
“When have I ever shot too high?! You’ve nothing to fear. I’ll be careful,” [why is this separated? lol]
Alexzander said calmly, holding back laughter of disbelief. Why was his sister worried about him falling when he was the indefinite shooting star?
Before Sierra walked away she added, “Don’t shoot too high, my brother! Eventually shooting stars burn out and vanish.” Her gaze penetrated him like a dagger, and as she walked away, it was almost as if she had given up.
“I’ll be fine!” How dare she, [dash instead] how dare she - [no dash] accuses me of shooting too high. I’ll last, [semi or dash instead] the strong and fearless last, the weak and puny fall. My dear, dear sister, it shall be you who doesn’t last. Not I.
Sierra looked back; [comma instead] opening her mouth slightly as if she were going to add something, but when she saw how enraged he was, she turned back [s]round[/s] around and continued to walk, her stance upright and tense.
After all the guests had left, [dash instead] some looking thoroughly drunk. [dash instead] The marquee was cleared of everything. Antio began to limp off, leaning on Melissa and sighing, her expression imperceptible.
Sometimes she wished he were like he’d once been. It wasn’t that she didn’t love Antio, she knew he hated being forced to do this. Jared’s cost-cutting infuriated her, a safety net down below trapeze wouldn’t have been expensive and would have kept her husband fit and able. The man she’d first fallen for had been strong, brave, and proud… He still tried to be, but the wolf inside him had died that night. Melissa hated most that Jared thought of him as half a man. Her Antio was no different than any other man.
Just then, they both heard shouting, [period instead] “Melissa! Antio! I need to see you.” Sighing involuntary, they made their way over to him.
In his hand he held a whip and his sleek, black top hat.
Antio took a step closer; [comma instead] his posture growing tense, saying, "No, no. I’ve told you before, Jared. I’m not interested in any such deal or undertaking with you! I may be handicap, but I know you’ve other such business Jared Lyons, and I wouldn’t trust you with anything as special to me as our only son and daughter! We are family; we shall stay a family and always be a family!”
Her heart fluttered, [dash instead] the fire, the passion, [semi or period instead] it reminded her of the early [s]day[/s] days. She nodded in agreement, her eyes full of [s]intense[/s] hatred, but her they were strangely hot and wet. “Jared Lyons, just be glad we can’t find work [s]else where[/s] elsewhere. For I’d rather I was far away from you with my family.” As she spoke, she stood up fast, eyes almost slitted: [comma instead] her voice low and menacing.
“But, Antio,] your children can really go far!” Ignoring Melissa completely, he continued. “They could leave and earn more money elsewhere!” added Jared, who bobbed his head in agreement to his own statement, holding his hat on with one hand.
“No, Jared, you just don’t get it, do you? They’re staying here, and don’t think I don’t know you’re various connections. You can’t have Sierra or Alexzander. Grow up; [period instead] you call yourself a man, [question mark or semi instead] the girl is only nineteen! She’s not yours to have.” Antio huffed while he spoke, one hand tightening over the crutch, reddening it.
“Very well, but remember, [colon instead?] I started you off and could very well end your career," he sneered, "or should I say ‘family business’ like this--” With that, he took the whip in his hand and cracked it on the ground, laughing at his clever example. Curling his fingers, Antio made a fist with his free hand, raising it fast, but his wife quickly grabbed his arm, preventing him from striking Jared’s nose.
She groaned, [semi or period instead] why did she stop him? He damn deserved it, and she wanted to break his neck - [comma instead?] to stop his taunts for good.
He stopped laughing when he saw the fist and, waving his finger to and fro right in [s]Antio[/s] Antio's face, said, “Now, now, now, Antio, you should try to control your temper especially as you wouldn’t last very long in a fight.” They both stared icily at each other, then Jared sneered, “--Oh, did you forget the little problem of walking? Too bad! Now get out my sight, [no comma] before I send your whole family out on [s]to[/s] the streets! Don’t think I won’t, [semi or period instead] you do, after all, know me, or so you claim, so never think I need you. I don’t!”
Melissa harshly pulled Antio away [s]hard[/s] (seeing signs of explosive consequences), controlling her own fury.
He’d no right, [semi or period instead] her family risked life and limb for him, and he didn’t need it.
The rain spattered down, creating puddles in the turf. Melissa carried him on her shoulder, ignoring the pain. She stopped suddenly and whispered his name, [period instead] “Antio…”
He heard and spun around, [period instead] “That was brave…”
“It was foolish… [s]he’s[/s] He's right…"
Looking deep into his still eyes, [no comma] (no rivers of joy [s]flowing[/s] flowed from within), she elicited, “My husband…”
“Jared’s right.” He whimpered.
In the distance, the sounds of circus music played a new mournful tune; [colon instead?] a devilish ragtime.
The various jaded structures drab and fake shades, a weak merciless disguise of happiness, [s]creating[/s] created the biggest lie in the business. The colours looked no brighter to him than in actuality, [dash instead] just moaned of the turmoil they all went through. The circus [s]just[/s] hides behind this, fooling all except those who knew it.
The circus had been his life for so long. Many a dream-filled child [s]wish[/s] wished of running away to the circus… [s]if[/s] If only they knew…
Now it had become apparent: [s]he[/s] He needed to settle down with his kids.
At dinner, he thought to himself as he and his wife darted to their room, I will ask them.
He looked over his shoulder but couldn't see anyone. Must be behind one of the trailers, he thought. After Escorting his wife to her trailer, he [s]then[/s] went to his, own pushing [s]over[/s] the wooden door open.
Melissa watched him vanish into his caravan from the doorway, [no comma] and wished - no, considered -- to go in with him. [comma instead] to Show her love was still a thousand [s]thousands[/s] [s]time[/s] times as strong as it once been. How could someone be so heartless, [no comma] as to separate a husband and wife [s]away[/s] from each other?
Rubbing his arms to ward off the chill, he turned his head and saw that the window was open.
A knock interrupted the silence, causing his heart to scream in shock.
“Who is it?” he replied plaintively. He then frowned at his voice and [s]responded[/s] repeated with a braver edge to it, “Who is it?”
“It’s Sierra. Let me in, [semi instead] I need to talk to you,” answered the feminine voice coming from out in the rain.
“No, Dad, sorry, it can’t. Please let me in”
She walked in, [s]skin-[/s] drenched and dripping all around her so that small puddles, [no comma] [s]were[/s] formed at her feet. Her leotard soaked, and her hair [s]impersonating[/s] impersonated a mop.
Antio stifled a giggle at her appearance before sighing. “Well, Sierra, what can’t wait until dinner?” Sitting down on the nearest chair, he crumpled irritated.
“Its Alexzander, [period instead] It scares me how he never seemed afraid during ‘Blind Luck’. I have to ask, were you afraid, [s] father[/s] Father?” While she spoke, her face and body were animated.
Sierra shot to his side, her face laden with worry, [period instead] “Dad! Father! …You okay?”
Antio pushed her away angrily and stood up, his eyes awash with tears. “That was long ago… I’d… rather… [one set of ellipses is sufficient] …not …talk about… it…”
She admired her [s]father[/s] father's strength, [no comma] but didn’t want him to [s]over do[/s] overdo it, [period instead] “Father, please sit down. It’s not good for you to stand without your crutch.”
He winced, digging his fingers into his skin, [period instead] “Sierra… it’s a matter of pride… Jared… takes all chances he can to taunt me about my problem… [s]And[/s] and sadly …I’ve grown jealous of ….you… and Alexzander’s success…”
Antio fell back against the seat and sighed miserably, [period instead] “How can you look up to me…, [no comma] when you soar like a bird…, [no comma] totally free… [one set of ellipses is sufficient] ...and I gaze with such sadness…”
Sitting down, he groaned miserably, leaning back over the chair. Throwing his face into his hands, he sighed, so depressed, and [s]moving his hand[/s] pointed towards the drawers, gesturing [s]towards[/s] for his crutch, [period instead] “Sierra, be a dear and get my crutch, [period or semi instead] even if it makes me half of a man, I need it…”
She hated seeing her Father so miserable, but she needed to know. She gulped [s]afraid[/s], her hands shaking, [period instead] “Father, were you afraid?” [s]Holding[/s] She held out his crutch, almost like a shield with expected onslaught
Laying his head in his hands again, he took the crutch, [period instead] “Please… please… you’ve got your life…, …I’m half a man…, …don’t remind me of my failings!”
Moving a little closer, she nervously probed, [semi or period instead] she had to be sure, [period instead] “Father, I need to know!”
Standing up, he stood over her, [no comma] and looked into her eyes, [period instead] “Go… now!” The power in those two words was astoundingly effective.Nodding, her lip trembling slightly, she left, turning back to add, “Please don’t push yourself too hard?”
Turning away from the door, he sighed, left wondering who could have been in here.
Changing slowing, he gripped any firm object to keep his balance; [comma instead] pulling his circus costume off until he was standing in his underwear in front of the mirror.
Antio was very muscular and had a howling white wolf tattoo [s]howling[/s] on his back.
Except for a balding spot on top of his head, [s]the rest[/s] he had [s]was covered with[/s] rich inky black hair.
Reaching to his neck was a short fluffy beard, [no comma] with finely [s]chiselled[/s] chiseled features. Many of his admirers loved him, but they were slowly shifting towards his handsome son.
Antio [s]started to slip[/s] slipped on his formal clothes, [dash instead] a pair of polished black shoes, some well-worn black trousers and his dinner jacket, [dash instead] almost mechanically.
He took one last look at this room; it had been his home ever since Jared had taken him in.
The room was nothing amazing, but to him it was home. A long narrow bed, [semi instead] a few knick-knacks he had collected were scattered around the room, along with posters advertising and praising his performances and acts and his [s]children’s’[/s] children's. Shows were arranged on the walls next to his, starting with Sierra and Alexzander as a young kids, then gradually becoming the centre of attention on all posters.
A wardrobe was propped against the other wall and it housed all the costumes he’d ever had. The whole boarding room seemed quaint and happy, but to Antio, it was a room full of lost memories.
He lifted his crutch and hobbled over to the door, pushing it open, and headed out to meet his family for dinner, limping with his crutch in his hand, smiling - if only fake.
It had stopped raining.
Alexzander lay on his mattress, dozing slightly, contemplating. Sierra sure had struck a nerve. Why should he [s]of[/s] have been afraid? He’d practiced thousands of times before, every time as graceful and well done as the last. He sighed, ruffling his hands through his hair in frustration. Why had her words affected him so much? A look around his room was enough to kill any feelings of fear. Posters with such exclamations as
"The Gravity Defying Duo”,
“Alexzander and Sierra: Angels of Joy”
and
“The Dove and Eagle of Loka’saw”
Just glancing at such praises, he knew he’d do it. Long ago he’d talked to his Mum about this, but she was preoccupied with his Father, and even he could see, [no comma] she hated everything this place stood for. Though money was always an incentive to him, [no comma] and the admiration.
He smirked [s]Smirking[/s] at the ingenuity of it.
Well, if my dearest sister Sierra is jealous, he thought to himself, then it’s time to raise the stakes even higher! Smiling to [s]him self[/s] himself, he climbed off his bed and began to change.
The circus master grinned. He posed in front of his mirror, speaking to himself in a businesslike manner, holding blank applications in his hands, [period instead] “It’s not easy to find fresh talent! For [s]god[/s] God's sake, they have so much potential! Alexzander and Sierra, [dash instead] oh, how they rake in the customers. But that father of theirs, [ellipses or dash instead] he’ll need to be taken down a peg or two, [period instead] I wonder… "
You wily thing, Jared, [period instead] yes [s]but[/s] the boy could be useful, but oh, Sierra... [s]it[/s] It was time to end this pointless charade of this show business and take what he really wanted, [dash instead] by force if necessary.
He held his hand out to his reflection before he sat down. He leaned back in his chair, running his bony fingers through his short russet hair. His dark [or black] [s]- dark brown - almost black[/s] eyes, [no comma] were calm, [no comma] but sadistic. The crimson ringleader uniform was now creased, ruffled, and [s]looking[/s] looked less magnificent than it was in the main tent. He grinned maliciously, [period instead] “Maybe…” he pondered, [period instead] “-- [ellipses or nothing instead] Just maybe the father needs some good old-fashioned persuasion. I wonder if he’d respond to…”
He laughed sinisterly. “When I’m finished with that annoyance, and of course Melissa; she can’t be left alone. So… Jared, if both their Mother and Father are incapacitated, [dash instead] so to speak, [dash instead] the family... they’d need a guardian, and if I could gain both their trust maybe Sierra would…. [no period] Ah, Excellent.” He chortled, [s]amused,[/s] adding the finishing touches onto his thoughts, knowing that nobody could accuse him of not having high ambitions. He smiled, [semi or period or dash instead] nothing lasts and he was sick of this business.
It’s end game.
Rephrase this so it can stand by itself.
Leaping she caught with her legs and looped them round the stool; then she raised two fingers to her lips and let a shrill and piercing sound free, throwing himself off backwards as soon as the sound was uttered she speedily caught him still gripping the stool with her legs and with astonishing strength she flung Alexzander into the air.
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