I wrote this to my friend because all she does is complain about herself. I know some of you know people that do that, so maybe you can understand.
Also I know the flow is a little off in some places.
Tell me what you think please!
I take constructive criticism well, so don't be afraid to be harsh and honest!
Millions of others roam this earth
There are you know; millions
Millions that do not know you exist.
You focus on yourself, and wonder;
Why does no one understand me?
You are an idiot.
The world will focus on its own problems.
Just as you center around yours.
And still you wonder;
Why does no one understand me?
You complain daily,
About the mistreatment of poor little you.
You see a man walking down the street in the nice suit;
You are jealous; his life must be perfect.
That man’s wife has breast cancer.
Selfish! Unbearable! And damn annoying!
You tell me I never worked for anything.
I did you know, but I will not complain to you.
Your issues are no matter to me
Because daily I deal with my own.
Moan! Nag! Complain!
Look around yourself just once.
See the world, watch the news!
Realize you are not the focus of this earth
To be blunt; Get Over It.
You're telling us about your friend and explaining that she complains. But, to be honest, I don't think your readers really care about that. They want to feel your aggravation, your annoyance and irritation. I see that you've attempted that, and for which I give you your props, but it could be better. I disagree with Lauren on this one, though; it's not the worst poem. It lacks a bit, but that's not something a little editing can't fix.