Hiding Magic!

Are story starts with the Crinoline family. They are a family of eight and they had a REALLY BIG secret that they were hiding from the world! Well not exactly the whole world just normal people that weren't magical like the Crinoline's! Well see that's there secret they were wizards and witches. There were 3 wizards and 3 witches in that family. The wizards were: Austin, Adam, Ty and there dad Todd. The witches were: Nicole, Destiny, Ashley and there mother Laurie. So the parents have kept there secrets for 35 years each and the girls each fifteen cause they were all triplets and the guys have been keeping it for sixteen years cause they are all triplets also!

many many errors. Where do I start?
You said:
Are story starts with the Crinoline family.
Are? I think you meant our. ( This is a very basic opening. You are simply saying. Here's a story. Try and be more precise and detailed as well as interesting. Try opening with a detail about the family.
"The Crinoline family were no ordinary family, for they had terrible, dark secrets"
You said:
They are a family of eight and they had a REALLY BIG secret that they were hiding from the world!
They are? Present tense? Meaning that they are still living..hmmm...
The format that you use seems kind of boring. You are simply listing status that doesn't provide the reader with much detail or intrest.
You also capatalized two words. REALLY BIG. If you want to capatalize "really", fine. but not both. You shouldn't even capatialize whole words at all because they tend to detatch. moving on...

Well not exactly the whole world just normal people that weren't magical like the Crinoline's!
First, you do not need this sentence at all. If you don't mean the whole world, don't say the whole world. It is a time waster that will lsoe the reader's intrest. I can see that you are trying to introduce that the family is magical. Perhaps you could try another, mroe detailed way? Also, you put 'Crinoline's ' you don't need an apostrophe.
You said:

Well see that's there secret they were wizards and witches
there is spelled their in this sentence.
This is a very basic sentence. It is un-interesting and flat. with no expression or voice. You need more expression!MUCH more!
There were 3 wizards and 3 witches in that family.
This is simple, plain , like the other one.
The wizards were: Austin, Adam, Ty and there dad Todd
again, 'there' is spelled their
same problem with detail
The witches were: Nicole, Destiny, Ashley and there mother Laurie.
there is spelled their. This sentence is almost exactly the same as the other one. No one wants to read the same sentence twice.
So the parents have kept there secrets for 35 years each and the girls each fifteen cause they were all triplets and the guys have been keeping it for sixteen years cause they are all triplets also.
This. WOW. EXTREMELY boring and confusing. If I was the reader I would close the book right now and go and HIDE! Bor-ing! Confusing. Annoying.
you also used "cause" no chatspeak PLEASE.you do not need this sentence at all.

Overall
MUCH MUCH MUCH editing is needed. WOW austin!
more detail, be mroe precise, edit it and read some more books
P.S. Cool names!

*mental anguish*

beaverpop101 wrote:Are story starts with the Crinoline family.

Our story starts [...]

They are a family of eight and they had a REALLY BIG secret that they were hiding from the world!

Tense Change.
they have a ....
don't use all caps. It's tacky.
they were hiding from

Well not exactly the whole world just normal people that weren't magical like the Crinoline's!

There should be a comma after well, but don't correct yourself like this. Just change it so this information is included in the previous sentence.

Well see that's there secret they were wizards and witches.

Well, see that's their secret, they are wizards and witches.
Just remove up the 'well, see' part.

There were 3 wizards and 3 witches in that family. The wizards were: Austin, Adam, Ty and there dad Todd. The witches were: Nicole, Destiny, Ashley and there mother Laurie.

There are three wizards and three witches in that family. The wizards are Austin, Ty, and their dad Todd. The witches are Nicole, Destiny, Ashley and their mother Laurie.

So the parents have kept there secrets for 35 years each and the girls each fifteen cause they were all triplets and the guys have been keeping it for sixteen years cause they are all triplets also!

Huge Run-On. Split this up.

'so,' is the correct way, but remove so.

The parents have kept each kept their secrets for thirty-five years. [EDIT: Years. Although, I *did* cry thirty-five tears when I read this.] The girls are all triplets and have kept the secret for for fifteen years. The guys have been keeping it for sixteen years, because they are also triplets.

General Comments:
Read some quality work. It's all over the site. The characters are completely flat [if they can be called characters, you never introduce them. They're like... silhouettes cut out of plain white paper. Give them depth!]

This is nothing more than just telling us facts. Make it come alive. My advice is to tear this up, and start anew. Think of them as people. Show, don't tell. And don't post this small of a section.

And lastly, can I mail you a dictionary? I'll pay postage. Bad grammar and spelling errors make sounds like the screams of banshees reverberate in my head. It's my inner editor-ness. I'm an English Teacher at heart.

wow. More reading..I suggest. And editing and more interest and detail.
You're topic is pretty interesting, it's a neat subject. But the way you describe it is... umm..not exactly top class. More description, explanation. And try not to carry on and on and on about one boring subject that could've taken only a few words.