sky

You told me
where I’m falling.

I was hoping to see
another smile, just like last time,
before the clouds kiss me and
hold me in their arms.
It’s too late, I know,
It’s gonna be okay.

Squeeze my hand
so I know your there.

Remember those lies
they always caught me with?
But you saw they were truth,
even if black is white
and I am good,
you were me
and I am you.

I don’t want to be anyone else.
I can’t be anyone else.

That’s not to say I’ll be gone long.
The cruel sky is taking me, the clouds
we are going to dance
an everlasting dance.

And the whole time I’ll be waiting,
just for you.

I liked this, but kind of had trouble understanding it.

This is just an opinion, but in this line
"It’s gonna be okay."
You might change the gonna into going to.


"Remember those lies
they always caught me with?"
Who's they?

"and I am good,
you were me
and I am you."
You keep changing from present to past to present tense. Keep it one thing, please, and make life easier.

I thought it was pretty good. It flowed pretty smoothly and had great rythm. I didn't really catch the theme though, but that just gives people something to think on. I'm not big on poems but I found it enjoyable to read.