Shorts

Walking down the Country road
Mud between
between my toes
Looking at the trees
They grow naturally
In rows

Open up a coke can
Drink all you can
Sip the foam from the top
Get every single drop

Taking photographs
In black n white
Wish for the night

Watching the stars
Shoot across the sky
Hearing the sounds of the birds
Flying by

In a fairy tale land
Were everything is wonderful
Like the wallgreens commercials
My prince will come on his shiny white house
And bring me to my home

I will wear shorts under my dress
Because I hate dresses
And my hair will be a mess
Because I can’t be bothered
But he won’t care
Hell just love to stare into my eyes

Looking at the treasure maps that are hidden behind
My black pupils
The little x’s and o’s criss’s and cross’s
Speckled all over my brown gateways to my mind
Behind them he will find a map that will lead him
To my heart

I loved this!

There were a couple of typos that made me go "huh?"

"My prince will come on his shiny white house" should be "My prince will come on his shiny white horse"... except a horse wouldn't be shiny, so you might want to change that.

"Hell just love to stare into my eyes"... you need to add a comma after he in the word "He'll" unless, that is, you really do mean Hell. I hope you don't.

Other than that, and the absense of punctuation, it was really good. I especially liked the first and sixth stanzas.

--Quippie

This was actually quite good; I liked the whole concept, somehow, I found it quite phsycadelic.

Not too sure about the flow though.