White Out, Black Out

This is really good, and i love it! I only think that this line:
"Start with your cool lips lightly on my collarbone." seem to not really fit werll with the rest of the poem as it seems too long? Just a thought, anyway, keep writing, its amazing.

I like it.

Winter pale, the line of ribs
below your strong shoulders
rise gently with each inhalation.

Perhaps a comma after shoulders? I found I had to read this part twice to understand your meaning, that it was the ribs rising, not the shoulders. It's a little confusing, and I think a comma would give it clarity.

The snow has begun to stick now
after last night grew slick with ice
and transformers exploding along the street,
the occasional flicker of house lights.

This part didn't seem to fit with the rest of the poem so well - it seemed like a transition section, and it breaks with the character of the rest of the piece.

Wonderfully conveyed atmosphere, I love the winter metaphor throughout. Beautiful poem.

I haven't reviewed poetry recently, but I had to for this one.

I love this poem. It is brilliantly crafted and expressed, and there is nothing (in my opinion) to fix. I especially like the last stanza. This is probably my favourite poem I've ever read, anywhere, anytime. This is amazing. I already have it as a bookmark on my computer.

Keep writing more poems like this!