Greetings mortals! Your cruel and powerful king is here!
I am Fanfar! Lord of Flame! He who gives the light when the dark is spooky! Owner of circuses for animals! Hater of eggs left on pans! Giver of discount codes on quality earphones!
All puny mortals of this site music bow down to your true king Fanfar Lord of Flame to avoid being cleansed in holy fire! All those who resist shall perish in the flames! You must obey my orders! However painful and arduous they may be for your punishments in my torture dungeons will be infinitely worse!
All followers of Fanfar will get discount codes on earphones, the chance to kill lesser mortals and the chance to live through the cleansing fires that will scorch your earth. Send all requests to Fanfar Lord of Flame HQ.
Farewell puny mortals.
-Fanfar Lord of Flame the Unbroken; Circus owner, Egg smiter, Bringer of Flame.
