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youngwriter

  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, Science Fiction Re: 24 - prelude

    Ok then, Positive things: I liked the start, the build-up to the fighting, and the phrase "The time had come." I liked the phrase because it's such a powerful phrase ...

    Jul 7, 2012
  • Poetry » General, General Re: I walked with danger

    This is a really good poem! Almost every line flowed together perfectly, and the descriptions were great! I loved the lines; "His name: Taboo," "As I gazed at the blue ...

    Jun 17, 2012
  • Novel / Chapter » Action / Adventure, Fantasy Re: The protectors of the elements (improved version)

    Good story so far, but starting with the character is a bit cliched, no offence. Maybe you could start with her walking to school after she'd seen the shadow? For ...

    Jun 17, 2012
  • Novel / Chapter » Science Fiction, Fantasy Re: From Where We Started - 1: 1

    Ikerot, To start, wow! The descriptions and the thoughts were spot on, I could imagine being there with Elise! The fact that she started the fire makes me want to ...

    Jun 17, 2012


Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
— Mark Twain