xxcherishxx

Each night I think of you before I close my eyes, and I'm drenched with an unexplainable joy. I wish that I could tell you how much you mean to ...

i agree with bubblewrapped. It's way too short. It could act as a nice intro. and i think taking out the last line from the first sentence is good. Expand ...

It's a great song. Except that its a bit confusing to whether or not you want the light or the darkness. At last we see that its twilight that your ...

The third stanza has two typos in two and four. '"ment" should be "meant" Also for line 3, "i hated you" might flow better than "i hate you". i like ...

There is only punctuation for some of the writing in the poem. You should have them for all the lines of the poem. Also, there are many words that are ...

its a nice start. but i think you should make it longer, so that we get to see and understand more of what you're trying to capture. Having just two ...

nicee.. ^^ i like your rhythm but it gets a bit hard to find in the last two lines of your poem. its great though. X) - Jazi

thanks for all your comments and suggestions. ^^ i can change the punctuation a bit but im a bit lost as to how to change the overall rhythm so i'll ...

REUNiON I met her on an old path, a long forsaken lane. Her embrace was soft and sweet with the roses of yesterday. Her eyes still shone with, starry hopes ...

Helooo.. I'm Jazi. It's not my first time posting work but i'm new to this site. T.T I'm also a computer retard. So help would be much appreciated!. X)