writeitalldown

I allowed shivers to move rapidly down my spine as I pressed my back firmly against the wall, hoping that I would become one with the crude, hard concrete. I ...

Sorry to be a nuissance but I noticed in the beginning you used the word "groan" alot..... "Groaning I shot my hand out from under the warmth of my comforter" ...

Sorry to be a nuissance but I noticed in the beginning you used the word "groan" alot..... "Groaning I shot my hand out from under the warmth of my comforter" ...

First is first, attitude. If you are planning to write a good story, then you have to be confident. If not, you will only end up crumpling it up(in this ...

If you are trying to keep the MC's emotions withdrawn, be very careful because it can seem like the character has no feeling, therefore the reader resents the MC. Maybe, ...

Amazing..second chapter, please.

So, sad. I promise to comment later, after my head is clear.

I agree with the emotion of anger, and fear was there but I wish it was more exaggerated thats all. This is a VERY good poem, but everything can always ...

"I am kicked back down after a relentless attempt. The monster goes unharmed; it doesn't even limp."

This is what I simply love about your poetry! Your beginnings pull the reader in, and your endings are always so bold. Perfection once again.

I set out to review one of your poems in return for reviewing mine... I can't reall critique this though, its simply awing. Good job.

That should have took you weeks to take! Its long yet doesn't lose interest, flows and can be seen from different emotions. I'm not one for poetry that is long ...

You are completely right! It is too short, it can sum up your emotion, sure. As long as thats what you want to do, I mean to sum something up ...

I smile, to show you I care. I wink, to let you know you're special. I wave, to say hello. I cry, to show you I miss you. You smile, ...

Good, very good. I can feel the emotion, and know its there...I think it can come through so much stronger. Poetry is based on emotion, poems can be very well ...