weekend_warrior

Well done. I would lengthen the dialogue descriptors however, adding more between the lines.

Thank you everyone for the warm welcome. I look forward to writing and reviewing here!

Greetings to all at Young Writers Society and thank you for letting me into your family. My name is James and I am a 24 year old college student at ...

I don't think Tony Blair followed Bush blindly. Tony Blair stood up for what he himself believed to be right: That Saddam Hussein had to go. I find it hard ...

I am writing from my PDA, so I'll elaborate more on this later, but for now. Think about what really drives a hero. What could possibly make someone want to ...

It is apleasure to meet your introduction. Don't be discouraged about losing your ideas. I know the feeling about having ideas chip away in my mind. I recommend carrying around ...

I agree that the gun would be an equalizer. However, there are two sides to this: On one hand, you could give the character some very special powers. The risk ...

Era: 24 years after Return of the Jedi Prologue The shouts of the protestors grew to a rising crescendo that echoed throughout the streets of the Maragosian capital city of ...

I would introduce the names of the characters sooner in prologue. Even if they are minor characters, I would give the detectives names.

This is a short story taking place in a custom world that I creaded for a Dungeons and Dragons campaign. It takes Lee Greenwood's Forgotten Realms and advances the time ...

He had no time to think though as his opponent thrust his sabre at him once more. I think it is unnecessary to include the word 'though' in here. Removing ...

Among the hundreds of identically dressed soldiers in their plastic uniforms... While stormtrooper armor may be made of an advanced polymer, I'd avoid using the term 'plastic' here as this ...