-
Re: Aphrodite's Curse
Aphrodite’s Curse Ryan Collins Slowly turning her head with that more than casual glance—she gives him the silent knowing, holds the look of an eternal second, lighting a fire within. ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: A Blinding Light
There's a few punctuation errors and grammatical errors, but for the most part it is decently written. The only problem I had with the story is the content itself. I ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: Night
I think it has a nice rhythm to it. It is simple, but it is still elegant. I wonder why it's so short and my only problem with it is ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: The Toy Boat
I liked how you used your dialogue here, and I liked the flow it created. I have to disagree with priceless on the show and don't tell stuff, I don't ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: Don't question
I like the flow of consciousness you employ in the piece. It gives us an inside track to this persons psychosis, and by person, am I wrong to think this ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: Sum One
Sum One By: Ryan Collins Gazing into the mirror with that half awake, half dream state—I see myself there; with those distinguishing features attached to the thought of who I ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: For the Sake of Tomorrow
Well I would like to thank you for the review, however, I've never believed in the "don't tell, only show," rule. If it's a rule, where is it written? As ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: Forgotten
I'm really impressed if this is one of your first attempts at serious writing. I think you have a natural ability for descriptive language, and your use and command of ...
Aug 26, 2011 -
Re: Middle Ground
I think the theme here is obvious, and it's highly religious. That's perfectly fine, and I think you do a good job with some of your descriptions. You can tell ...
Aug 24, 2011 -
Re: the Shotgun Willies
The Shotgun Willies By Ryan Mitchel Collins I The dull, cold, silence of the night crept onward. It was turning out to be another impotent nightshift at the Golden Nugget ...
Aug 24, 2011 -
Re: Flight of the Dove - Prologue
I think you are at a spot where many young writers have been before. Your work is very transparent and you can see your emotion and feeling directly in your ...
Aug 24, 2011 -
Re: The Most Awesome Story Ever
I digged it man. It was pretty good, but I think like everyone, the work isn't very serious. It's a good piece, but I just don't know how serious we ...
Aug 24, 2011 -
Re: Love, the Problem
i just really find your descriptions to be great. I like how you work sensory details into every corner of the piece. I, however did not so much like your ...
Aug 24, 2011 -
Re: Natural Dancing
It was a fun little story to read. I'm not really sure what I should take away from the story.......maybe it is simply that dancing is fun and I can ...
Aug 24, 2011 -
Re: Resurrecting Phoenix
Resurrecting Phoenix By Ryan Mitchel Collins I I don’t know about heaven or hell. All those things I’ve heard about heaven or hell may be what it’s like, but I ...
Aug 24, 2011
