tigershark17

You've got an excelent start going here. I love how she sudenly kisses him at the end, but it kind of messes it up to have her slap him. Might ...

A little repetetive, but overall I really REALLY love this poem. This describes me so much, and you are able to put into words really well what I imagine a ...

This is amazing. I can't even begin to tell you how much this poem spoke to me. I can feel your emotions pouring through your words into the reader... you ...

Your detailed descriptions were what caught me most. You created vivid mental pictures with your words, so great job on that. I liked the part you snuck in about the ...

Very good. Dark, but I loved it. Good voice, intriguing and compelling, and held my interest. The story idea was very good, and kept me reading right to the end. ...

Well, there are a lot of conventional errors, and they are very distracting. However, that being said, it is a good idea. Work on sentence fluency too. Vary your length ...

Okay, still some grammatical errors, but the voice is good and I love the name XAvier, by the way. i have a similar character, XAnder, in one of my novels. ...

Awesome! Okay, so, I use the six traits writing system, which means I'll list each trait, a rating from 1-6, (6-high, 1-low) and comments for each. Let's get this party ...

WOw! Okay, first off I just want to mention that I don't even think I saw any punctuational errors, which is just awesome because nearly everything I've reviewed so far ...

Hmmm... This is very interesting! I have never really been into werewolves at all, but this is good, very good! Congrats on being able to draw me in enough to ...

Wow. You have a really unique writer's voice and an excellent use of vocabulary. One thing that would make both of those better though is to adjust your sentences. Some ...

WOw, this sounds really interesting! I haven't actually read the previous chapters yet, but I have jsut a few things to say about this. First, your writer's voice is excellent. ...

This seems like it's all dialogue. Try to add some more detail about what's really going on too. You have good sentence fluency and word skills, so great job on ...

Hey "thevoiceinside", how ya doin'? Well, my friend, it appears as through I am first! Yaay! *waves arms excitedly* So, I use the six traits writing system, which basically means ...

Ooh, very good! OKay, so, I use the six traits writing system to review, which just means I tell you how you did on the traits and give you a ...