spiritblackwolf2705

Very good, I think Canis and Azila covered pretty much everything else... ~Spirit

Omg, thank you so much! I fixed the "wanna"

That was great. There really isn't anything I can see wrong with it, but than again I'm not good as giving long critiques. Keep up the good work! ~Spirit

Ah, Wonderful and funny! I love this story, it keeps me interested and waiting for you to post the next one. Keep up the awesome work! ~Spirit

EDITED again!

EDITED! Lol, Well I just added two new stanzas.

Thanks. She doesn't know that her loved one is dead yet, because she is sleeping, well falling asleep.

Hmm....Pretty good. Although I got lost, I liked the descriptions you gave. ~Spirit

Very good! Your writing shows your emotions, which makes it all the better. ~Spirit.

Thanks! For once I didn't do a rhyming poem...

Well done! It was very interesting and kept me reading. I found little errors, but those have already been pointed out. Keep up the good work! Can't wait to read ...

Thanks Ayra! :D

Wow, okay, Brad. I personally think you are to harsh, you may be trying to help with the writing and everything, but it doesn't seem like it. So if all ...

Umm, not much I can say about this piece besides, there really isn't any description of the characters. All you put is dialouge between them. I would suggest re-writing this ...

Edited!