sparkle8744

This is a very nice start to a good story. I think you can do a little bit more to it to make it better. I would advise that you ...

This is very intresting. I think it might be better though if you added a paragraph or so. I was a tad bit confused as I read it, but it ...

I really enoyed this beginning. It was very discriptive and I got a clear mental image of the situation. I think it might be a swell idea to tell a ...

This is a very nice piece. As I read it, it kept me wanting more. I also didn't find many grammatical mistakes. I think you should tell a little more ...

It's definetly really short, but i dont know how to add anything to it. Maybe yal can help. Also the title is 'Once Upon a Morning'. I forgot to put ...

The wind blew through my golden red hair as I sat in the wet green grass as I watched the sun rise slowly. I didn’t know why the sun attracted ...