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Re: Short story-The Project
Wow, that was fantastic! You painted such a beautiful picture! I honestly have nothing to say negative about your posting, except that a few times I thought of some better ...
Jan 13, 2010 -
Re: Blue Ice Fire...prologue
Wow, that was great! I only have a few suggestions for changes. On the subject of grammar and spelling, just go back and double check that you have all the ...
Jan 13, 2010 -
Re: untitled book - prologue
I really think you have a great start here, only a few things to nit-pick about. You tend to use alot of sentence fragments and short sentences, and combining some ...
Jan 13, 2010 -
Re: werewolves/vampires chapter 2
I've decided to edit/comment in green :) Teal'C "Why the hell did you do that for" I screamed at Anna, who was lounging near the airport water taps. A buzz ...
Jan 10, 2010 -
Re: Black Rose-Chapter 1
I generally agree with Lydia, although I'd like to add a few things. To be honest, I was fairly confused with the last paragraph. You should consider adding more transitions, ...
Jan 10, 2010 -
Re: Short Story: The Enchanter's House
I rather liked it, although personally I would change some of the wordings, but that's just minor details. I enjoyed how the furniture and everything had personalities, and how the ...
Jan 10, 2010
