sarebear

Aliza, First of all, you need to leave spaces between paragraphs. It's different from in Word. I did that too the first time. You can't indent, you need to leave ...

Hi! I really really liked this story! I like the rhythmic feel of the saying. Such an old saying-one that every child hears many times, but used in an unusual ...

Hi guys, I've edited it now! I'd also just like to let you know that this poem was based on a trip I took this summer to the Canadian Rockies! ...

I was in preschool, maybe four years old when 9/11 happened. One of my friends' father was killed. I didn't really understand. I remember my mother telling me to be ...

I guess I'm kind of slow on the uptake since you've already written another one. However, I still wanted to say that this is beautiful. It was extremely sad. I ...

Stomping into my bedroom was my mum saying, “Liam get up! Don’t make me come in here and turn that alarm of yours off again! And your dog needs food, ...

This is really funny. Reviewer #1 assumed that Tracy was the cotton candy vendor. Reviewer #2 thought that Jason was the toothless man. Actually, I had thought that they were ...

The homeless child Trembles Sitting on the cold stone steps Of a house where the door is barred. The child who is lost Cries All alone in a supermarket aisle ...

Huh? :?: :?: What is this about? No idea. I thought you might be able to tell me what I could do with this scrapbook of ideas. I guess it's ...

I really like it so far. I love your description of Ella; "I’d known Ella for as long as I could remember. I had only just been born when I ...

It's pretty good. A couple things: "Alex, are you close?" Mom rings into my ear. How can someone ring in someone else's ear? You might try to extend the beginning ...

Hi Guys, this is my first post. It is the first chapter of a book I'm working on. Please let me know what you think! Also, I'm planning on adding ...

Dark. Most definitely dark. Agreed. Sick, too. But amazing. It is short but completely effective. Elegant. I can't really find anything wrong with it. Just, you might give it a ...

I like it a lot! I agree- a little bit more about the poison...maybe a flashback? I enjoyed it and think you should definitely keep going.