To isolate is to be angry, Alone.
But to be angry is too close to violence.
So why not be alone?
Alone is scary.
Alone is losing yourself.
Alone is impossible.
But the feeling is still there.
Alone and depression are interlinked.
A big word often misused and as funny joke.
That hurts me.
That a state so serious and personal is made into something so unserious.
Depression is a problem that feels impossible to fix.
You know it's there.
It pops up now and then.
It eats away at your brain.
Feeding.
You don't know how to fix it.
The help you need seems obsolete.
It seems Impossible to actually follow through.
As a state of loneliness, it is easy to lose yourself.
That's what I found myself doing.
Losing myself.
I've been gone 6 months now.
I'm still lost.
I'm still looking.
But that feeling keeps on coming back,
More often now,
It’s eating away at all of me now.
I feel as though it will soon be finished.
And I will be empty,
All alone.