ofir

This is a very rough draft. I've worked at it and worked at it, but it seems... odd. I don't know how to fix it. I appreciate any attempt at ...

Hello there. So, first off, I like this. The rest will be pretty harsh, but I've got praise at the end, so read on. I thought this was... nice. Very ...

I don't quite understand the first line. "I was three years dead, but it told a tale" what does "it" refer to? as for the rest of the song, what ...

I know you already got a lot of reviews, but I couldn't help myself. This was really good. I liked it a lot. Well, anyways, as long as you fix ...

I like this so much! This was written very, very well. The only thing that bugged me was: [quote] move anywhere that allows you a spare minute to inspect yourself. ...

The Raven Song The ravens always come They never leave me alone Standing so still like they're made of stone, They keep chirping "it's okay" But that's all they really ...

Alice hides alone in a dark hole Because in life Alice must play a certain role. On the verge of insanity Alice swings Like a bird with no wings. There ...

This was very good. There were places where the rhymes might be a bit awkward - but if you write this as a song then it wouldn't matter, because you ...

Gipsy Scuttling through the forest, Melanie ran. The fir trees around her stood tall and mighty, and every branch which twisted itself into her hair made her gasp for air, ...

There isn't much to say except I really did like it. I thought we heard the narriater more than the little girl herslef; as in, the song is about her, ...

I liked this very very much. Your words were meaningful and deep. The only thing that bothered me was that this would be hard to sing, most likely - there ...

Thank you everyone for your reviews! It means a lot to me. I apologize for not sending pms, but rather doing this together. To those of you who misunderstood, this ...

Well, Fixed already did all of your typeos... so that's that in that department. I can't really critisize anything but that, yes, it could be a song, it would actually ...

He Didn't Like Me We were never meant to have a happy ending. Not me and him. Humans, maybe. I mean, all fairytales come from truth, deep down underneath. But ...

This was pretty nice. I got a clear sense of your Mc, though I'm not sure if she's a little kid or a teenager - most adults don't think the ...