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Re: The Timekeeper - Prologue
“Please, one more second," ? not , I said Shouldn't you be building emotion? You epic failed if you were. Said is such a plain, boring word, void of all ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: My pathetic love story Chap. 2
pose. I could care less. posse. I couldn't care less. Awesome-ness NEVER! use something else! Cutesy Got to be kidding me? CUTESY!? HUH! NOOOOOO. Any word by that! its almost ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: My pathetic love story Chap. 1
noticed he had walked in Noticed he'd walked in His natural Raven – colored hair was catching the light, making it gleam Small r for raven, and try: His raven ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Together Fornever Prolouge
Hello Icefire! Ah this is brilliant! The frigid night air whistled throughout the forest Through the forest A girl, dressed all in black, was darting from tree to tree, hardly ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: To Be Weak [EDITED]
It is only short and most of what i want to say is already done... soo... Breathless Right we get the point - she makes him feel euphoric. Now get ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Don't Fret
First off - ah this is splendiferous (not a word.. but hey!) Well, his hippo ate the last bean, if we’re going to use that analogy. As said above, it ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Prologue: Harlem's Run
I hope you got my pm? Right: To begin with: slow down no need to rush. Use commas, use - and semi colans. I strongly recommend in the future you ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Imagine how the person above you looks like by their avatar
Either an Asian, or somebody who likes Asians, or somebody who claims to be an Asian. [i have many friends who claim to be asian. Sad life i've got.]
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Ban The User Above You! [3]
Banned for being 2 years younger than me! Ha
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Prologue: Harlem's Run
Okay reviewing now but telling people you haven't edited turns people off... and you should've edited before posting, though so far i can't find anything major. Give me until tomorrow
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Readers Crit
I'd love that to be reviewed
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Adelaide, a Prologue.
Sorry if this sounds a little harsh. And because i gave you something of mine to review in 'review for food' threat, i decided it to be polite to do ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Would a character smoking in a novel bother you?
No, it wouldn't bother me. It would tell me things about her though - she doesn't take care of herself being one. The choice of smoking or not smoking would ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: Young Writers Society Testimonials.
it has taught me a wider vocab, because when reading other people's works, i can see new words and i am then able to use them in my own works, ...
Dec 16, 2008 -
Re: June's review thread
The title: Stepping Into Static The Genre: romance The link: It has vampires, it is a love story, mild language but nothing you have not heard before! There are more ...
Dec 16, 2008
