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Re: I thought I lost you...
As I walked into my house, after going grocery shopping with my parents, I walked upstairs and headed for the computer. I began instant messaging and surfing the internet, when ...
Feb 15, 2010 -
Re: Acting
Despite what both of the reviewers above have said, I find this poem very powerful. I understand the emotion, and I really think it is beautiful. Better than anything I ...
Aug 11, 2009 -
Re: My Garden
This is beautiful! But I have one comment. The ryhme scheme seems a bit funky, or off beat haha. Maybe it's just me? :p Overall I really liked this. It's ...
Aug 9, 2009 -
Re: drunk driver's persepective.
That girl was good, brave, and responsible. Yet she was the one dead, and it was my fault. I heard a bang on my front door. I heard my mom ...
Aug 9, 2009 -
Re: As I sit alone
Feel Free To Critique! Writing this poem, as I sit alone People wonder why I'm hiding; Inside my invisible shield. I listen to the silence of the air Feeling the ...
Aug 9, 2009 -
Re: Genetics
I understand what you mean, although this is vague. You are half of your parents, but you just want to be you. Someone new. (unintended ryhme, right there. haha.) I ...
Aug 9, 2009 -
Re: Living in a world
Thanks for the tips, I'll be sure to capitalize. As for the metaphors and whatnot, I kept this poem bland for a reason. I understand how I could make it ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: Music; In General
please feel free to critique, give ideas, and thoughts on this. it's a rough draft! FIRST DRAFT: Close your eyes Listen to the notes arrive They gradually swing Forming music ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: The Stream
Ohhhh! Now I get it! Clever... haha. :]
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: The Stream
Oh, and also.. "The ocean is for those who made the right decisions Now they can rest and become one with the ocean" you said ocean twice. it sounds awkward ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: The Stream
I like this a lot, but what did you mean by this? "To reach the ocean, is to reach the end of life" The end of life? To me it ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: Living in a world
living in a world where people just don't get it wishing they would just understand but i like the way i'm living it all the mystery, karma, and hope the ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: The Cycle
Hey, this is absolutely brilliant... just saying. :] I really like how you flipped the characters around, and how you set up the poem. It's genius! Just liek the person ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: The Writer
Hey Calben, I really like this. :] I mean, I don't fully understand what this means.. but it's worded beautifully. haha. Feel free to PM me and tell me what ...
Aug 8, 2009 -
Re: Trust.
As said already, capitalize your I's, and you'll be all set. I really like how you are very straight foward in your poem, with one certain message that you want ...
Aug 8, 2009
