mariahneu

Bonjour, mon ami et dudette de camarade. :) Il fait très beau de vous rencontrer et de faire votre connaissance. Bienvenue à YWS! : D - Mariah- la maîtresse d'Anemoi ...

Hey everyone! Just thought I'd pop in, say, "Hello", and tell a little bit about myself... I am 13 years old, my birthday's on October 5th, and I'm from the ...

The civil war is a topic that really intrigues me... I really loved the journal entries that you wrote, through the eyes of a nurse in the civil war. Very ...

This story was a little confusing for me to read... I would suggest leaving one space between each new paragraph, for the sake of the reader. There are a lot ...

"He fiddled while Rome burned..." Prologue: Nancy and Fred were off to the Kennedy airport en route to an excavation site in Rome, Italy. Nancy, an archaeologist, was in search ...

Very nice. :D I actually wrote something like this a few days ago, but it was more of an essay than a poetry called "True Poetry". I think I'll post ...

Shoot, I didn't realize that it was a repeat. :S Thanks for telling me; I just changed it. I'm going to try to add some more details to it right ...

I really liked this poem; very descriptive and I loved that you made it into a "shape poem". However, I would center the poem so that it looks more like ...

I give you applause for having the courage to write a piece about the terror of math. Oh, how I hate math, and I can relate in so many ways... ...

Thank You all for your comments and critiques, they are much appreciated. :) I think I'm going to stick to writing poems about nature... I just changed the the line, ...

I really loved the word play and such in your poem. "my stomach twirling, Dancing the Salsa". The wording is so much better than just saying that you have butterflies ...

I canoe along the ocean-like lake, Not a care in the world, not the sound of a motor. My paddle, caressing the water with every stroke, The canoe, walking on ...

There, I just edited it again. Basically, I changed the whole idea behind the body and the spirit, but I kept most of the mind contents. What do you think?

Thank you both for their critiques. I just edited the poem above, so please reply with what you think of the revised version.

My mind: filled with thoughts of love, Daring to escape in the form of passion, Revealing my hidden desires, Dexterity, what I need most. My body: the fruit of gossip ...