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Re: Growing Down
Ah, good. Thank you, whence. =D
May 18, 2007 -
Re: Growing Down
Ah, thank you all very much! You don't know how happy it makes me to know you all enjoyed my poem. =] McMourning, I have a reason for having "letting ...
May 18, 2007 -
Re: Growing Down
She clutched the tiny seed in fist in hopes that it would not be missed. But grasping tight, not letting go, suppressed its noble need to grow. So there within ...
May 16, 2007 -
Re: The Trial
I was distracted from the actual message because of the mistakes I found regarding rhyme, flow, and grammar. The fact that there are only two words that are capitalized kind ...
May 16, 2007 -
Re: A Dark Eyed Girl
This is cute. I felt like there was some missing punctuation in places, though. Pretty basic message. It's almost like the title gives it away, though. Like the poem just ...
May 16, 2007 -
Re: Arachnophobia
The imagery is of a spider actually inside of a person ... the chest being a human chest, not like a treasure chest. The poem is about how love ends ...
Apr 26, 2007 -
Re: Arubia's Instructions
It can't exactly stand alone, but it's good in structure, rhythm, and flow. =]
Apr 25, 2007 -
Re: Arachnophobia
Within the chest, they erupt from their silken cribs, Weaving withered webs of want amongst these fragile ribs. In time, the quaint strings quiver, Calling them to kill. And creeping ...
Apr 25, 2007 -
Re: Ignorance - Part I
There was hysterical laughter flooding from the hearse and into the deserted streets. The vehicle was camouflaged by the darkness while the trademarks of the city shone violently against the ...
Mar 10, 2007 -
Re: Down.
Alright, let me start by saying that I liked it. If it had more rythm/structure, I would LOVE it. The last line kind of bothered me just because I'm a ...
Feb 27, 2007 -
Re: Unspoken
I really like this. I couldn't find much flaw in the actual content. It's definitely original. I love the descriptions at the end. The quote, "I don't care if you ...
Feb 24, 2007 -
Re: Looking in
This is good. I love the diction and the rhyme, though some rhymes seem forced, like in the fourth and fifth couplets. There didn't seem to be much of a ...
Feb 24, 2007 -
Re: The Music Box
The lights on the vanity shone with a powerful but kind glow, softly reflecting off her face’s smooth features. She gently patted blush onto her bare cheeks, accentuating her pale ...
Feb 24, 2007 -
Re: Too Late
Ah, thank you both very much! I really appreciate the feedback, and I'll definitely try to fix that third stanza. =]
Feb 15, 2007 -
Re: Too Late
The midpoint of the coldest month - when gardens suffocate. The snowballs plummet fiercely down on chaos they create. I notice everyone I know is digging through the white And ...
Feb 15, 2007
