lcubed

Thank you ill try that!

Beautiful! I loved it!

Really well set of your feelings!!

This overall flow is great! I liked this

This is very capable of being great with a little clean up. Like at parts,"It doesn't really matter because who would admit talking to themselves about nothing?No-one.I don't even remember ...

I liked how this was simple but still meant a lot. It was good!

That's good that you are taking your hard feelings and making it into a poem. Shows you are a true writer. I liked this and it showed how it came ...

Needs work! But i can see this becoming something real if you get your story out of her dad left blah blah and her mom is now alchoholic. Yeah we ...

Thank you and I agree with the disregard and i changed it!

You're feelings were expressed well in this.

I like the flow of your feelings and how "she" is used. Explain "will swallow her wholeif she is trapped." Why?

"we're a tired bunch of fools" Maybe expand on that? Very good!

Explain HOW you feel about him not noticing..."you walking down the street every single morning. I smile at you but you never notice." Maybe it could be longer? Good start!

We need to learn how to fall, Then we should discover how to pick ourselves up. We all want to change the world, But we do not realize we need ...

Good ideas and written well. But I feel like your overall flow with.. "we all crave it.Finding that special person thoughis not a mission for the faint of heart." could ...