jellybean

Hello! I'm going to start off with nitpicks. Today was one of those days he actually enjoyed a silent date night with wine and silence. This is a little awkward ...

Yay Chapter One! This was pretty long, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. I'm not going to go through and pick apart every little thing; I found some things that need ...

I am Jonah. I guess a lot of what we do is in our names. My own name reminds me of a Biblical tale in which a prophet was trapped ...

The annual Festival of Magic would have been held that last week of July, but unfortunately, for nearly the last century the festival has not been held; it shall not ...

Helloooo! I shall be humoring you today. :) I can definitely see the science fiction elements here (the airship, Sara's fangs, etc.), however, I don't really see much of a ...

Hey Lauren; you have no idea how much I loved this! :) This could fall into a couple different genres...science fiction and romance, but I'm leaning more towards science fiction ...

Hello! All my comments will be in red. :) Preface I really don't think a preface is necessary here. You could replace "Preface" with "Chapter One" and the story would ...

I love this! I think the idea is original and awesome and amazing and...okay, I'm running out of peppy adjectives haha. Anyway, I just have one little nit-picky thing. Your ...

Hello HonoriaHayden! Grammar/spelling-wise you did very well, however there are a couple other things you need to work on. (1) A Hook. Right now, the opening line that you have ...

Hello, I haven't been on here in months, but I'm back! :) Alright, let's get started... General Impression You have a nice, solid beginning; I didn't find anything seriously wrong ...

The children tell me without whispers. I can see it in their dreams, burning through their eyelids, swelling into a storm. Save us, they say, save us. I thought that ...